Chapter Text
The gross sound my throat made finally stopped, my breathing wasn’t causing me to choke anymore, and my face was almost dry. “My brother sucks-” I mumbled. I thought for a minute, trying to remember, “What did he do?” I asked. They had worried looks on their faces, god I hated them and their non-verbal communication, stupid fucking telepathic bullshit. “Don’t look at me like I’m a beat puppy, and repeat what you said!” I snapped at them, waiting for one of them to speak. “He’s in a band.” Barty spat out, glaring at Evan for slapping him.
I let out a chuckle, eventually laughing my ass off, “My fuck ass brother,” I spewed out inbetween my giggles. “In a band!” Oh, of course he would, “Let me guess, lead singer and electric guitar-” Evan and Bart smiled at me, laughing a bit, but they didn’t understand what made it so funny. Honestly, it wasn’t that funny, it was just so Sirius fucking Black. Of course he would run away to play in a goddamn band. I’d never tell Ev or Barty, but I remember being 8, Sirius convincing me we would make the best two man band in the world. He always told me we’d show our parents how amazing we were, and then we’d travel the world on a stage. He got to live that dream…and I’m here.
I stared at Barty, for someone who could lie about murder and get away with it every single time, he looked so guilty. “Spit it out, Barty,” He let out a breath, “Alright-” He mumbled, reaching for his blazer and digging through the hidden pocket. “Here-” He mumbled, throwing a thin square at me. A CD case, with a picture of my brother sitting in a shopping cart alongside some bigger blonde kid, he had a keyboard in his lap and my brother held his guitar straight up by the neck. He looked so happy, like he was having the time of his life, living his dream. Because he was. Living our goddamn dream with other people. There was a guy at the end, dark thick hair and glasses that looked like he picked them out at 12 and stuck with them. He had a pair of drumsticks in his hand, riding on the back of the cart. He looked stupid. There was a guy on the side, leaning over the cart, his bass guitar over his shoulder. They looked completely different from each other: My brother in jeans and leather, the bassist in a thick sweater and trousers, the keyboard bitch in a flannel and beanie, and finally the stupid drummer wearing a spiderman cropped top and cargo pants. They didn’t look like they belonged, but at the same time, they seemed so happy together.
Big text read “the MARAUDERS” over the bottom. I flipped it over to see the song list, and hell, they had a good amount for a debut. In bright red letters, honestly an eye sour, was the names:
Red Converse
Blah, Blah, Blah, Backstory Stuff
Hi Momma, f u Dad
Rats, fucker
Catch a deer
The Black House? HA!
A werewolf kinda full moon
A spy, spy, spy
My father never struts…
Anything for our moony
THE MARAUDERS
I tossed it back at Barty, “Like I give a shit,” I spat. I got up, kicking off that stupid cloth that was once a blanket. “I need to get back before Mother and Father through a fit.” I stated, dusting my front as I walked down the hall to join my parents as they spoke with families.
I entered the main room watching couples dance, parents and families sharing words. “Master Black, a moment?” I heard a man’s voice. Goddamnit. I turned to see Mr. Lestrange, my cousin Bella’s arm wrapped around his, as his official wife. I smiled seeing her. Me and Sirius were always close to our cousin’s. “Trix-” I mumbled, bowing my head, “Mr. Lestrange,” I acknowledged. He was a fine man, nothing special, just another family. But I know she’s not in love, at least she had to change her name when they married. She smiled at me, “We have a surprise you can’t tell the Family,” That’s when my smile turned fake. I knew what she was about to say, that she was about to bring a child into this world, extend her new family name and continue the blood line. She knew I knew what she was about to say, “Will you be the Godfather of my son?” She asked. I nodded, “The pleasure is mine,” I mumbled, wrapping my arms around her as she hugged me. “Thank you, Lu,” She mumbled. When she let go of me, I felt tears in my eyes, I didn’t want her to leave. She glanced at her husband, “Mr, please allow me to speak with Regulus,” He nodded, before going to catch up with some third cousin twice removed, reattached once then dyed blue. She gave a fake smile, I know it was fake cause Trix didn’t smile at any man. She turned back to me, “How are you, dear?” She whispered. “Fine, trying to lose the fathers practically throwing their daughters at me,” I mumbled a small chuckle leaving my lips. Over the years I’ve learned what I can say in front of Bella, as she got to be a young adult, the things I can say have become more tight, strict. But she always loved joking about our families marriages.
She frowned more, “I’ve been gone for a year, but I didn’t live under a rock,” She murmured. “I know what happened…to the tapestry-” Our famous family tapestry, pictured redone every 5 years, but the moment someone’s out of line…burned. The burn stays every redo. “Sirius made his choice.” I spat, “It doesn’t bother me, just as Andromeda didn’t affect you,” I saw her eyes darken. “Andy was my sister. Regulus I don’t care who you are, Black or not, I know what happened in your house. I know he was just as much your brother as Andy was my sister,” She spat, holding the necklace around her neck in her hand, the one marked with an A, Andromeda’s Pendent. She was a very unstable person, always defensive, quickly going from caring to offended. “He is my brother. The difference between me and you is that she was your sister, he is still my brother,” I uttered. Sirius has been gone for years, and while I loved Bella, she has grown into Trix, Sirius isn’t here to call her ass out. So I will. “I will be the godfather of this child, but I assure you, I will not support you. I love you Bellatrix but you will be like your Mother and Father, I pray you will not be like mine. Andy and Sirius are not a disgrace, they learned to survive. They don’t have to survive because of how hard they fought before. Me and Nara are surviving, but you? You are becoming them. Now leave me alone, I have to go be someone,” I didn’t yell, I didn’t make a scene. I held my ground, I would not take her shit. I bowed my head once more before turning to go about my day.
She grabbed my arm, “Regulus Black. I am not my Father.” She spat, her eyes looked angry and hurt, “I’m surviving.” She mumbled, letting go, stomping away to find her husband. I loved Bella like a sister, but she is a complex woman. She was a brilliant person, she had the chance to become something great, she was just dealt a bad hand. I walked away, I couldn’t dwell on her for long, she moves on quickly so I’ve learned there’s no point in being so caught up in it. “Master Black?” I heard a young voice. I just can’t get away. I turned to see a young lady I couldn’t recognize nor did I see any family crests in any of her accessories. She bowed her head, “Pleasure to be at such a magnificent event,” I almost laughed, words with such big meanings for this. “I thank you for attending, and it’s a pleasure to host such a grand gathering,” The smallest smile on my face, produced only for courtesy.
“I was wondering, Master Black, if I could ask for a dance?” The smile on my face became a real one, all these stuck up families had bullshit traditions, the fathers and men of the house speaking for the daughters. “A dance?” I questioned, making sure I heard her right. “A dance,” She confirmed. “I must admit,” I lowered my voice to her, “I am no dancer like the Rosiers, my art is in music not movement,” She grinned, “I am no dancer either, but I watched you with Ms. Rosier and you seem to hold your own just fine,” I gently held out my hand, allowing hers to fall into mine. “A dance, then” I mumbled, before leading her to the dance floor.
I placed my hand on her waist, the other on her shoulder, allowing her to do the same. The music began, a beautiful piece that I’ve learned to hate due to it being played at every event I’ve been to. I smirked, as she spun in my arms, “You dance well, Ms?” She chuckled, though not giving me an answer. I swayed alongside her, enjoying the silence we shared. When the musicians played their last notes, she smirked, “Good-bye-” She whispered, before waving as she walked off. I smiled, a light laugh bubbling in my throat. I took a few steps back, staring as she walked away from me, before turning to go in my own direction.
“Regulus, darling,” I heard Mothers voice. I felt my eyes roll as she walked up to me, “She is a fine young lady, from a prestigious household,” She explained, her tone pleased as ever. I forced a smile, “She was a wonderful dance,” I replied. “She got a dance with you, that alone is impressive,” She laughed, taking a sip of her wine glass. “I will speak with her mother and father, maybe arrange…” She paused, glancing at me, “An observed house meeting?” I sighed, slowly nodding my head. Of course, now with me as her official heir, the matchmaking has begun. “While you do that, I’ll need to excuse myself to go to the restroom,” I mumbled, watching her wave me off when she spotted something she just had to go see.
I walked off, finding an empty hallway. I slumped down, feeding my hands through my hair, my back against the wall. I didn’t want to go to some girl's house and pretend to laugh at her fathers jokes and act like I care about her hobbies. I felt my breath heavy in my chest, it was gross, dirt filled. I felt the air suffocate me, oxygen poisoned my body. I felt my soul being ripped from my body, my mind becoming a machine pushing out bodily commands, breath, blink, get up; all without any reason. I walked, feeling heavy in my own skin, each step was harder than the last. “Reggie,” Sometimes I hear these voices…when I’m like this. “Reg.” My feet falling in front of me, catching me, then moving me forward. “Reg.” Reg. Reggie. Regulus. Regulus Black. …Lu. LuLu.
“Regulus Black.” I felt sharp pain on my shoulders, finally seeing not just looking. Barty. I wanted to say something, but I couldn’t even open my mouth. “Regulus.” He mumbled. I stared at him, blinking. His eyes closed, looking away from me, the corners of his mouth turned down.
He turned, wrapping an arm around me, walking, pushing my void of a body to another room. I turn to him, finally able to push words through my mouth, “Ta peau me fait mal,”
I want out of this house.