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It Can’t Rain All the Time by wellthisisprettyrisque (brainwitchletty)
Fandoms: Panic! at the Disco, Young Veins, Twenty One Pilots, Fall Out Boy
22 Feb 2017
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Summary
It's difficult enough that Josh has to be away for months, on tour and preforming and having very little to even so much as send Ryan a text. But Ryan gets it, he really really does, he just wishes Josh would stand up for him and have people stop telling Ryan to kill himself just because they're engaged.
Series
- Part 2 of Existence is Weird
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Bookmark Notes:
Ryan couldn’t take this anymore. Even Dot was cowering somewhere away from the noise. Ryan didn’t blame her; he’d be doing the same if he could. “Forget I ever asked,” Ryan said, just wanting Josh to stop.
“How the fuck am I gonna forget my fiancé asking me to quit my band?” Josh asked.
Ryan hadn’t asked that of Josh, he’d just asked for a break, but Ryan had known, deep down, that his request was just as unfounded as what Josh had assumed to be the actual request. Ryan couldn’t look Josh in the eye. What he’d asked was ridiculous.
“I think I’m just gonna go to bed,” Ryan said shakily. “I’m not very hungry.” He stood from the couch and rushed to Josh’s side, kissing his cheek before he could chicken out. It was a horrible relief when Josh didn’t pull back from the gesture. Ryan went to the bathroom and drank a whole glass of water to force his breathing to regulate before he went to bed in his day clothes. Josh joined him about an hour later.
“I’m sorry I can’t do what you need me to do right now,” Josh murmured as he lied down next to Ryan, putting an arm over him and pulling Ryan into his chest. Ryan didn’t hesitated in hiding in the warmth of Josh’s body. He was so beyond grateful that Josh wasn’t holding anything against him. “I promise, once we have the wedding, we’ll take the longest honeymoon ever. Just need to wait a little longer.”
“I don’t know if I can,” Ryan whispered.
Josh didn’t answer and they fell asleep with Ryan’s words hanging over their heads. Josh woke up the next morning around 3 AM. Ryan helped him pack up his things and kissed him goodbye when Josh went to catch his cab.
Then, once Josh was gone, Ryan drank another cup of water, went to the corner the couch made when pressed against the wall, and sat down on the floor.
His brain shut down.
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Bookmark Notes:
omg the ryan feels the gut wrenching awful
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