my husband and I had our first threesome today and the guy died
my mom's in a pokemon go battle right now in the other room saying a whole shonen protagonist speech
apparently there are tricks to cheat during battles and you can sometimes tell when your opponent is cheating and i just heard her say to her phone, verbatim, "why do you cheat? does it make you feel good? do you lack such esteem that false victory is good enough for you? fuck you. i'll go down fighting."
she just started saying "die raichu die. die die die die. with your big smile, die"
and I said "mom I don't know if I like what this game brings out in you"
and she said, "what, would you want your mother to be some sort of loser in the leagues???"
in the pokemon world, where it's normal and encouraged for 12-year-olds to strike out on their own and be largely self-sufficient to train pokemon, we must also consider 12-year-olds could also be left at home with pokemon to be largely self sufficient while their parents travel the world training pokemon.
which is what my mom might realistically do.
Encouraging a man to start a union with a flirtatious wink. Miles you are wildin without your wife to reel you in huh
last night my partner held a somber little passover seder to show me what it’s about and when they got to the part where they were supposed to open the door for elijah they paused, frowned, and said “oh. huh. there is a clown.” and I looked out. and sure enough. there was a clown.
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