Smokin' Aces

Smokin' Aces is a 2006 film about a assassination contract that is put on Buddy "Aces" Israel's heart by a mob boss. Several hitmen compete to be the first to "smoke Aces" and retrieve his heart to claim the million dollar contract.

Buddy "Aces" Israel

• What do you see right now? You see exactly and only what I choose to show you. That is illusion, Ivy. That is the lie that I tell your eyes. Makin' the magic happen in the moment, in that split second you can see past this motherfucker and find that's all bullshit. I can shape it, I can shift it, I can make it as real as this room. That is why I am valuable here Ivy, and that is why you are not. I am sorry. I love you. I never wanted it to be like this, you know that.

• Hugo, you're looking at me like I just asked you the fucking square root of something. What did you say to Mecklen on the little motherfucking machine?!

• Are you a colossal fucking idiot?

• [mimicking Russian accent] A cinammon roll, the roll of the cinammon? That looks like a jizz. Yeah, Eastern European jizz. That looks like some fuckhead shot his load on a $12,000 calf skin jacket. The twist is it's my $12,000 calf skin jacket. Okay so you got the semen. You got the human ejaculate that has been allowed to sink in for seven hours alright, work its way into the fabric fucking fibers.

• Hugo, there isn't a fucking laundry detergent or cleaning product known to man that will get that clean. Some shit, suffice it to say, just don't wash out.

• Do I believe in loyalty?

• These flowers have wilted. Call the florist.

[about his many prostitutes.]

• And I say this from the bottom of my heart: retire.

• We just gotta keep ourselves together. Stay with me. Stay with me man. Hugo, you with me? You with me baby?

• We're almost home.

• [last words] Forgive me.

Agent Messner

• Oh, you're fucking sick, man. Hey and don't put it up against the water there. Don't even let it rub shoulders with it.

• We're getting robbed here, man. Sixteen hours of staring at Sparraza's house and this guy's got hookers up there fist fighting.

• Put that gun down or I'll fucking drain you.

• You are going to tell me why no call was made to inform us that the Israel situation had been altered. Why I and my partner and friend, who's body is going into a furnace tomorrow, weren't fucking contacted.

• Make it make sense.

• Shitcan the cue card rhetoric and talk to me like a man.

Jack Dupree

• So there it is. The bond on Buddy Israel expires in eighteen hours, after that it's jump ball.

• For some fucking reason the wise guys love him. They think he's a mystic you know, something special.

• How about the Tremor brothers? Three of them. Same skank mom, different deadbeat dads. They're used for that suicide style, kamikhaze shit. You heard about that dinner club in Cleveland, right? Well the Tremor brothers go rip shit riot on the whole fucking place. Seven dead, twenty-eight wounded. All to get this one fucking guy. Of course in the melee one of them gets shot in the neck passes out, the other gets blowback from a jammed piece is temporarily blinded, the last takes a bullet in the back, can't walk. These are speed freak, neo nazi assholes who read and recite Mein Kampf like it was mother goose, they're meaner than shit, they're dumber than hell. And these motherfuckers will go megaton at the drop of a hat.

• Rip hand to god you've got nothing to worry about. Yeah, I've assembled a team. We're gonna go in and get this guy Israel and everyone is gonna leave the theater grinning.

Agent Carruthers

• Why don't you talk a little louder, Steve? Just keep your fucking voice down.

• Israel's awake. There was apparently a fight with some prostitutes, but he wasn't involved.

• I'm gonna get to Israel before they do.

• [While reaching for his gun] How long have you been working here?...Bill?

• [Last words] Mortal. Mortal.

Georgia Sykes

• You got the .50. What you trying to shoot a jumbo jet out the sky?

• These two dudes are just lying in the elevator all shot up. What ever it was, it got way past words.

• Man are these feds fake or for real, Sharice? Please Sharice?

• [while in a standoff with an enraged Messner.] I didn't kill your man downstairs I found him like that. Whether you believe or not, man that shit ain't even important. We can either work this out and live or we can keep doin' the same shit we been doin'. Now I don't have any problem with you or your bureau so I think you should just roll off and just let us move on.

• Faggot-ass redneck...

The Tremors

• Darwin: Alright enough grab assin' goddamn it. Get them suits and the car, pitch those three poor fellows in the lake, and y'all find me over at the hotel.

• [Before he is shot to death.] Darwin: I'm really sorry about all that. Shit gets, shit gets wild and crazy and fate just up and fucks ya' for no good reason. You know ha, ha. It's the way of the world the way it's always gonna be. Okay, alright then, peace bro'.

• Darwin:[manipulating Jack Dupree's mouth] I forgive you Darwin.

Darwin: Shoot, I appreciate that man.

Dupree: If me and my brothers were in trouble with the law and we needed your car, we woulda done the same to you.

Darwin: You really mean that?

Dupree: Uh, hell yeah. We was just at the wrong place at the wrong time, so don't feel so bad, chief. You know up here in heaven it's beautiful. I'm gonna see you up here some day.

Darwin: You think so?

Dupree: I know so. [Darwin lifts Dupree's eyelids and manipulates his mouth making it look like he is smiling]

Hollis Elmore and "Pistol" Pete Deeks

• Pete: Would you please find your fangs, you fucking coward, and get with this.

• Pete: Put the fucking rabbit down.

• Pete: Well then, quit acting like someone took a shit in your cereal bowl. Reed payed us fifty grand.

• Hollis: If this Israel really is the great white whale of snitches then why are we messing with the mob who are, correct me if I'm wrong, but I think they're gonna pour boxes of bullets inta' his ass. What incentive is there to track him on something as smalltime as a fucking skiptrace.

• Hollis: No I'm gonna go to Kentucky and take Fort Knox with a sling shot then I'm gonna go into hell after Hitler.

• Hollis: You're investigating those murders out at the lake? Three men were ambushed and shot, two died and had their bodies dumped in the lake. The other has severe hypothermia, possible dementia, and will likely be a multiple amputee by weeks end if he even fucking lives that long.[[Referring to Darwin what he just did to him.]

• Hollis: [Before killing Darwin] Fuck this.

Pasquale Acosta

• Yes it is, it's filling up your lungs right now. In a moment you are going to asphyxiate, pass out, but you shouldn't be feeling any pain right now.

• Close your eyes, close your eyes. Don't make this face the last thing you'll ever see, because heaven may hold it against you.

Stanley Locke

• A million-dollar hit could draw some huge flies, and Acosta is pure mercenary. He is known for taking on serious contracts and he certainly is not alone.

• You must understand that if an attempt is made on his life, it will be made by those of the strictest professional caliber. And they are immoral, ruthless, and without restraint. And they must not succeed.

• Will you take that gun out of my spine or engage the safety please?

• Okay if you like I can take your verbal resignation right here, right now. Do you want to end your career here, Agent Messner. Your call. I understand your feelings right now and I truly am sorry, but we have an obligation that are authorized to abide by regardless of our personal feelings. But now it's time for you to get on jet back to D.C. and make no further inquiry into this matter. Is that understood Agent Messner? Are we clear Agent Messner?

Cast

• Buddy "Aces" Israel — Jeremy Piven
• Agent Messner — Ryan Reynolds
• Jack Dupree — Ben Affleck
• Agent Carruthers — Ray Liotta
• Lazlo Soot — Tommy Flanagan
• Georgia Sykes — Alicia Keys
• Sharice Watters — Taraji P. Henson
• Darwin Tremor — Chris Pine
• Lester Tremor — Maury Sterling
• Jeeves Tremor — Kevin Durand
• "Pistol" Pete Deeks — Peter Berg
• Hollis Elmore — Martin Henderson
• Pasquale Acosta — Nestor Carbonell
• FBI Deputy Director Stanley Locke — Andy Garcia
• Primo Sparazza — Joseph Ruskin
• Sir Ivy — Common
• Rip Reed — Jason Bateman