I’m howling, I know shit about the newest Snow White Disney regurgitation but I just clicked on it on iMDb and-
1.8 stars????? I didn’t think that was possible. I clicked on it and-
IT’S EVEN FUCKING LOWER THAN THAT IF YOU DON’T COUNT THE OBVIOUSLY PAID-FOR 10S. Like even the other two recent disasters are higher than that!
This is where it occured to me to check something and-
IT’S RATED SIGNIFICANTLY LOWER THAN A MOVIE MADE PURPOSEFULLY TO BE AS GROSS AND HORRIBLE AS POSSIBLE. HOW THE FUCK DO YOU EVEN MANAGE THAT??????
IT’S EVEN WORSE THAN THE SEQUEL OF A SEQUEL OF A HORROR MOVIE MADE EXCLUSIVELY BECAUSE TOM CARDY MADE A SONG ABOUT IT.
I think I’m going to pirate this and watch it out of sheer morbid curiosity.
I couldn’t help myself, I went on a quest to find a movie worse than this. A bit hard, because iMDb doesn’t let you sort by the lowest rated 250, but I managed.
BEHOLD! The movies that managed to get a worse rating than Snow White!
Pledge this!
I actually saw this one when I was, uh, probably way too young for it. It’s about Paris Hilton being a sadistic tyrant of some posh university and it includes charming scenes of her making aspiring college students eat leftover sushi from dog bowls and spraying whipped cream on her boyfriend’s dick to make her dog give him a blowjob. Definitely worse than Snow White, right?
Well-
Enough people thought it was at least ironically funny to give it a 3.7 mean so it’s, technically, NOT worse than Snow White. I guess Paris Hilton is at least hot.
Next, we have:
A very promising title! Apparently it’s a sequel of a Turkish film ‘The Man Who Saved the World’, (which in itself is apparently 'Turkish Star Wars’) and which one reviewer called 'mindbogglingly awful’. Hold on, let me show you the funniest part of one review:
This movie is so bad it interferes with one’s inner peace! Surely not even Snow White is THAT bad.
Except-
To be fair, Turks in Space is a sequel of a problematic cult favorite, so it still manages to have some fans. My condolences to the person whose inner peace was disturbed, I hope you moved to a Tibetan monastery in 2019 and haven’t had internet acess since. Hell, 2024 would be be better than seeing this.
Okay, by now iMDb algorhythm or whatever it is has figured out what I want and grudgingly started offering me its worst rated movies. Unfortunately…
It turns out it’s REALLY FUCKING HARD to make a movie that is so universally unappealing. Even the worst movies so far have at least a dozen people who gave it a pity rating and a few maniacs who think it’s unintentionally the best thing ever. Finding something below 1.8 is actually pretty hard!
But I prevailed and found this!
It’s a very bad german vanity film about… I don’t know, some guy who won a talent show once? The reviews speak for themselves:
'Cultural equivalent of stoning the viewer to death’. Wow. Have we finally found the most universally hated movie of all-
NOPE! Turns out even camcorder vanity projects have their fans. And mind you, this movie at least didn’t cost 250 million to make! Considering how cheap it looks and that some people went to war with the German Amazon to track it down, I think it actually made more money than it cost anyway.
And so my search for a movie hated more than Snow White continues!
We’re taking a turn for the absurd, and while these are TECHNICALLY a series, I have found TWO things that have made me nearly burst my spleen.
We have…
Literally just a collection of Charli D'Amelio’s videos. I have to admit I had to google who the fuck that was.
But she still isn’t what we’re looking for. She does get an honorable mention because it’s on her page that I found THIS.
People wiser than me have already realised what this is, but alas. I am an idiot. The 'ape’ part should have tipped me off, but in my defense, seeing only half of that monkey’s head was probably on purpose because you realize it instantly once you see it.
I had to open my computer, open youtube in a private window and then carefully copy it over here without opening it because I don’t want Youtube algorhythm to catch so much as a whiff of it. But yes. It’s exactly what it says on the tin.
HOWEVER.
It is, by the virtue of at least the people who went blind at the Bored Ape concert, NOT the most universally hated movie! Snow White continues to edge out some VERY stiff competition!
i have a new theory called alive internet theory where i propose that the internet is full of real people and you can befriend some of them even and maybe actually kiss them and more
“Raw milk is better for you as long as you boil it” so true bestie now imagine if we could like. Super boil it. To really get all the bacteria out. And if we could do that quickly and efficiently. Imagine that.
today i found out that when monarch butterflies migrate south for the winter, all the ones that go across the middle of lake superior suddenly stop going south and go west for five miles and then continue south. which really freaked scientists out cos like What is in the Middle of Lake Superior what do Butterflies know that We Dont Is This The End Times etc. anyway turns out about a hundred million years ago there was a mountain there and the butterflies still think they gotta fly around it. classic butterflies
Y’all, unfortunately, this is just not true. A few months ago, I urged people on this site to be skeptical specifically about ecology & wildlife biology posts with no sources. This is a perfect example.
This post has made its rounds for ten years (originally posted in 2015), and the earliest source I have ever been able to find for this claim is an article posted in 2013, which says:
“Biologists, and certain geologists, believe that something was blocking the monarchs’ path. They believe that that part of Lake Superior might have once been one of the highest mountains ever to loom over North America.”
Who these “biologists” and “certain geologists” are is a mystery. The article links two sources:
Dillard is an acclaimed author and nature writer, but she is not a biologist or geologist and cannot be referenced as such. The referenced excerpt from Pilgrim at Tinker Creek:
Dillard credits this claim to nameless entomologists and a book with no title. It’s a dead end. Bear in mind, the entomologists and books who may have made this claim, which Dillard later read, would have done so pre-1974.
The truth about monarch butterfly migrations may lack the sci-fi/fantasy allure of a mountain range that exists only in a butterfly’s primordial memory, but it’s still incredible.
These creatures with magnificently intelligent and fragile bodies are believed to use internal solar and magnetic compasses to traverse mountains and lakes:
But as far as I can find, there is no Monarchs’ memories of a long-lost mountain which dictates their modern-day migration route.
If anyone has more insight on this, I would appreciate it, because I am not an entomologist. I specialize in marine science and scientific interpretation, and I only used those skills to find and present what I believe is the best available information on this topic. Thank you!
people keep calling this “a net zero information post.” you should click any of the links I shared about butterflies and the lake and learn something new and exciting! : )
