prev ur so right. the One of Leeks

moment of unspeakable beauty today when one of my coworkers called another coworker "judas" for not splitting a can of white monster with her, and i got to watch the guy who sits next to me open a new google tab, type in "jeudis," and say quietly to himself "french thursday...?"

Pedro Pascal - Jimmy Kimmel Live (March 2025)

ITS APRIL 13 YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS

FETCH ME NEIL

do not go to therapy. enough people went to grant us all herd immunity. we are all fine and we will all be fine God bless

i like working at plant store. sometimes you ring up someone and there's a slug on their plant and so you're like "Oh haha you've got a friend there let me get that for you" and you put the slug on your hand for safekeeping but then its really busy and you dont have time to take the slug outside before the next customer in line so you just have a slug chilling on your hand for 15 minutes. really makes you feel at peace with nature. also it means sometimes i get to say my favorite line which is "would you like this free slug with your purchase"

@holyknuckled you get it. lterally what are we here on earth for if not to occasionally impose gastropods upon unsuspecting customers. this story is delightful

@holyknuckled like that?

oh? my god???

yeah, Exactly like that

Me: can I have a turn on the hedge now?

Hedgehog: no

it was a bad pain day yesterday so i was using my cane and i said to my bf “when i use my cane it makes me feel like i should be prescribing mouse bites.” and bf did not know what i meant so i sounded malignantly insane

"what drugs was op on when they wrote this lmao" none. due to the tense economic situation i've resorted to having weird thoughts for free

Three things I've always dreamed about having in my house are a video game arcade cabinet, a pinball or skee-ball machine, and an old-fashioned vinyl record jukebox. Like, I want these very badly and there is a non-zero chance I will spend a small portion of whatever inheritance I receive to buy just one of these things, if there is anything left after house repair.

What are some cool larger things you would genuinely love to have, if you had money and space?

i want a taxidermy stag that i can use as a coat rack. an articulated skeleton would be fine too and probably easier to dust...

Okay, who wants to see my absolutely hideous jewelry rack I made out of a large set of deer antlers? I feel like I need to ask consent for this, it's pretty bad. (I like it, but it has received very mixed reactions.)

Very bad picture, but this. Made from a rack on a skull plate I got for free somewhere.

It was intended to use up a bunch of fake flowers and ribbon, and then the little folded paper star and sequin strings got stuck up there later to keep them away from the cats and I never took them down.

I like the little star strands but they do not match the colors of the flowers At All and the flowers themselves are downright hideous. It's awful, but in person it's big and thus it has presence, and through that it has a kind of charm. But it holds my pendants and keychains.

But the IDEA of this is sound. It could be done very prettily.

...I would love to give it another go, actually.

Art on bottom left by @margravelucian!

no but he doesn’t mind if you wriggle a little

good morning i feel like seven dollars

Food Crime: Frosty the Slawman

so a while ago, I saw this photo going around on tumblr:

ALT

at first, I thought this was photoshopped. I mean, "welcome new man in your life"? that feels like a translation error, or someone being silly on purpose.

but guess what! turns out, Frosty Slaw Man is real!

and soon...he will be mine. let's get cooking

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I am FASCINATED