Human Condition
- a Wolfstar one-shot for @hp-soulmates prompts: Gay + Marauders Era + Sharing is caring
- Rated E for Remus's dirty thoughts and some gratuitous smut
- Word count: 3k
- Thank you @drwhoisginnyholmes for betaing and your helpful insight!
- Happy reading!
Call him jealous — he doesn't give a fuck.
It's not like anyone would believe it. Well, James and Sirius might but they'd think it's funny. Hillarious even.
And really, what does Remus even have to be jealous of? Sirius is his soulmate. Remus has him for life. Nothing but death will separate them if he has any say in it — and Sirius is not likely to abandon him either.
Remus is not jealous. He's secure in his relationship. He is very clear on exactly what kind of hold he has on one Sirius Black.
That doesn't mean, though, that he doesn't find himself bitter.
That doesn't mean, though, that he doesn't wake up in the morning and drink his tea laced with envy.
He's possessive —sue him. You'd feel the same in his position.
His position is this: draped over the third armchair from the fireplace — the one with the small side table next to it, onto which he can lean his elbow and occasionally his parchment to mark places he needs to rewrite. His back is to the rest of the common room. He's facing the couches. On the one on the right, Lily and Mary are working on the same damned Charms assignment that he is. On the one of the left, James and Sirius have given up the pretence of working on theirs.
They're quite a scene, the two of them; sprawled over each other, touching wherever they can reach and planning a summer vacation with such carelessness that Remus wants to drag Sirius away by his collar and remind him that there is a war brewing outside. That there are other people Sirius should include in such plans other than James Potter.
He doesn't do anything but watch though, because he's not a bastard and he's not jealous of James's hand tapping a syncopated rhythm against Sirius's lower back, nor of James's foot hooked against Sirius's calf, nor of James's shoulder into which Sirius presses his face whenever James's forces him to shush a particularly loud cackle.
Remus could do something. James is not afraid of him — especially this far from the full moon — but Sirius is his more than James's, and Remus could stand up and pull Sirius up and into his arms and kiss him with tongue until Sirius's knees buckle and Remus is prompted to pick him up and carry him away.
Sirius might even find it funny. He likes it when Remus gets a bit rough when they fuck. He likes to provoke it out of him, and it takes quite a bit of provocation too.
This — tumbling with James — is not a provocation. Sirius is smarter than that. More sly. Remus doesn't know if he hates the skill with which Sirius has come to use their soul bond in order to emotionally manipulate him to do Sirius's bidding, or if just another thing that makes him more… fond of Sirius. On one hand, Remus has always been drawn to Sirius's intelligence. On the other… there's always the fear that Remus's fragile self-control will see such manipulations and take more than Sirius can give.
The last thing he wants is to become one of those arseholes who don't let people come within a five feet radius of their soulmate.
Remus doesn't do anything about James and Sirius. It would be ridiculous to do something.
He likes it when Sirius is happy. He's willing to do anything to make Sirius happy — to make him smile and laugh and strum their bond with warmth and enjoyment.
Still, his skin crawls with every bubble of joy that bursts through his and Sirius's soul bond, which is there because of someone other than Remus.
He swallows with difficulty and lowers his eyes.
Sirius has not always been so physically affectionate. He used to keep them all at arm's length. They had that in common, Sirius and him, at least until James pushed and pushed and one day, Sirius became touchy. One day, Sirius's physical existence fused so deeply with James's that Remus started to wonder if his and Peter's presence was even necessary anymore.
But James continued to chase after Lily, and Sirius replaced Regulus with James when it came to the title of his brother, and Peter and Remus were never pushed away.
If someone had been so gauche to press, Remus would have guessed James and Sirius were soulmates. His own seventeenth birthday flipped this perspective on its head though.
James and Sirius have been and still are everything to each other — two twin stars so above it all.No matter his desires, Remus never allowed himself to hope that he'd have a chance at trying to survive the depths of Sirius's feelings appearing in his own chest. But here they are now: Remus and Sirius, connected at a level no magic could replicate, and James and Sirius, still tied at the hip.
Here he is in an armchair only a couple of feet away from the couch where his boyfriend is cuddling with another man, decidedly not jealous.
Sirius manhandles James into sitting up, snatching James's essay for the table. His expression is haughty and mischievous, but he manages to read only the first few words aloud before James shoots a stinging hex at him.
Remus flinches as Sirius's amusement bounces towards him and forces himself to think about something far away from jealousy. About Sirius's body arching from a different sort of pain. Right above Sirius's hip bone — the one James pushes at when Sirius lounges to take revenge for the hex — is a bite mark which drove him over the edge last night.
The pride Remus feels for this spare moment is enough to distract him from Sirius enjoying the company of another.
Sirius shrinks James's essay and holds it out of the way. James tries to snatch it, fails and then — always the master of strategy — dives low and starts tickling Sirius's sides. Sirius is not particularly ticklish but there are two very specific spots under his ribs which are sensitive.
[cont. under the cut]
Keep reading
