tw // drugs, substance abuse

we all know leo is an amazing actor, but do you ever watch a film and you completely get lost in it to the point where it feels the character is no longer an actor at all but they are one. leo was jim, i was no longer watching leonardo dicaprio act but i was watching jim carroll’s life story. leo no longer existed, my brain completely detached the artist from art. it seemed so real that i nearly felt what he was feeling (obviously nothing to that extent) but it made me sweat, get chills, i was nauseous at times, anxious, it was intense. that’s what this film did for me, leo blows me away in nearly everything he’s in, but there was something about him being so young, so vulnerable, not knowing at this point he would be the one of the best actors in our generation that made this film feel different, it was the first time he really got to utilize his talents and show the world who he was and what he was fully capable of. the basketball diaries was a hard watch for sure, any film revolving around the subject of substance abuse always is. the withdrawal scene at reggie’s house stood out to me because just knowing how hard that is firsthand, the pain and absolute torture it is was portrayed so well, it should be hard for anyone to watch because it is one of the most grueling and awful things the body can go through. the scene with his mom when she wouldn’t let him in broke me, not bc she wouldn’t let him in but because of how difficult that situation would be for any parent, it reminded me of beautiful boy (2018) at times, and near the end it reminded me a lot of requiem for a dream (2001), and probably so many other films but those were the ones that came to mind. jim was willing to do ANYTHING to just survive that physical torture and the cravings until he hit rock bottom. i’m glad this had an ending unlike requiem though, an ending where there was hope- for him and his future. it isn’t always like that in reality but after watching this i rlly needed atleast a somewhat “happy ending”