Eugene von Blaas - The curious one (1897)
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Going to see children and adolescents dance badly, play ball badly, sing badly, play recorder badly because they are young: YES! YOU ARE LEARNING! INCREDIBLE!
People are so rude about going to watch the children in their lives do stuff shittily. “Ugh toddler dance recital,” “ugh tee-ball weekend again,” “ugh nativity play.”
That guy learned what skipping is this year and now he’s playing the piano the worst I’ve ever seen but the best he’s ever done! AREN’T YOU CAPTIVATED BY THEIR ABILITY TO DO A LITTLE BIT WHEN PREVIOUSLY THEY COULD DO NOTHING? Be filled with wonder and joy!
PEER REVIEWED
I promise you, the answer is not Mr. Darcy... read all the options before you vote!
Austen Man most likely to go down on a woman *unprompted*
Henry Tilney, Northanger Abbey
Edward Ferrars, Sense & Sensibility
Colonel Brandon, Sense & Sensibility
Charles Bingley, Pride & Prejudice
Fitzwilliam Darcy, Pride & Prejudice
Edmund Bertram, Mansfield Park
George Knightley, Emma
Frederick Wentworth, Persuasion
Bonus: Robert Martin, Emma
Bonus: Henry Crawford, Mansfield Park
Bonus: Admiral Croft, Persuasion
Bonus: Mr. Bennet, Pride & Prejudice
Estimated Sexual Abilities of Austen Men if you need a reference
Ok I’m truly exhausted and tomorrow I have to take a plane so the time has come for my favourite game: The Bare Minimum. In the next few hours we will discover what is the bare minimum I can do. In each area, I only have to push myself to meet the Bare Minimum line. Once that has been met, I can move to a different area. Wish me luck