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axayacatl.neocities.org

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axayacatl 17 hours ago

me bc i have no soul ---> x_X

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letslearntogether 9 hours ago

"I have met people who claimed to be satanists, who claimed to be involved in black magick, who claimed that they not only knew a lot about it...but as I said, I've certainly been involved, and I warn all of you, never, never, never. You will not only lose your mind, you will lose your soul."

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letslearntogether 9 hours ago

In that quote, he mentions "satanism" and "black magick" specifically, not simply things which are "occult". I think many get involved in "satanism"/"black magick" without really understanding what all that means; they think that they are simply rebelling against an unjust "god", a corrupt and hypocritical "church", etc.

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letslearntogether 9 hours ago

However, at its root is pride. Whatever "pleasure" or "power" that can be derived from selfish hedonism is not only temporary, it comes at an incredibly high cost to both oneself and everyone else. To impose one's will through manipulation and/or violence *does* eventually lead to insanity...

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letslearntogether 9 hours ago

...and a loss of the qualities that make one human (i.e.: compassion, consideration, and so on). Hence, tyrants are said to be "mad with power" and have "dark triad" characteristics. The promise to be able to "rule in hell" is one's total enslavement under the illusion of "complete freedom".

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letslearntogether 9 hours ago

People do not know what they are worshipping or why, and therefore, are easily misled to their own destruction. The labels matter little. What matters most is if one sincerely turns away from harming themselves and others, for in doing so, they turn towards Life.

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axayacatl 8 hours ago

i don't really have an issue with hedonism i think we kind of obscure it when pleasure motivates all desire. i think it's important to mention i don't worship entities, it's a different experience for me. it sounds strange but i don't mind this outcome or this feeling, i am free in the sense i see past various illusions that held me in dangerous cycles, but i'm still not a person of right hand idealogy.

axayacatl 8 hours ago

i truly think there is no essentially "right" way to live. i am someone who is enamored with chaos in a paradoxically peaceful way. i could also be described as someone "morally grey" even though what is black and white is subjective to place and time. i've written about who satan is to me, and how i'm not a satanist, but i know satanists who have different experiences with him.

axayacatl 8 hours ago

all that to say is my black magic experience and relationship with my darker characteristics may be a little different than yours. i still respect your perspective, but i think it's important to note not everyone goes into dark arts for the intention of harm but for a better understanding of a universal darkness that may be too heavy for most to handle

axayacatl 8 hours ago

with the end goal of the understanding being able to come to terms and live peacefully alongside one's shadows instead of eradicating them completely

i made a webpage that lets you use your monitor as a lightbox for drawing. you can check it out xxxtras > lightbox ! im in the middle of making it cuter as i post this lol
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i b fucking with bananas
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dragontalez 16 hours ago

yo bananas are the shit

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my least favorite take in the arts is criticizing a work for being "edgy shock factor with no substance" imagine going up to a drawing of a smiling flower and saying "mindless toxic positivity dribble". this has always bothered me its so hypocritical
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axayacatl 3 days ago

how are people even defining substance? are things that do not illicit positive feelings void of substance? i feel that motivates the arts to be a form of consumption instead of experience

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letslearntogether 3 days ago

*hides doodle of smiling flowers on art page*...I joke, but the implied quaternary there is interesting: 1. All shock, no substance 2. Toxic positive, no substance 3. Tragic, but meaningful 4. Hopeful, but deep...Rarely is anything so rigidly defined though. 1 and 3 can overlap, 2 and 4 can overlap, and opinions differ depending on who you ask. Lol

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letslearntogether 3 days ago

And therein lies the distinction: Opinions often differ from experience. A piece could be deeply meaningful to the "artist", but mean absolutely nothing to a "critic", or maybe even elicit a repulsion in them. One's feelings about a piece can also change as they hear an "artist" explain their work, or when they learn more about the "artist" themselves.

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letslearntogether 3 days ago

All personal perceptions and preferences, especially in someting as interpretive as "art". The nuances make things interesting don't they? :D

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axayacatl 3 days ago

it does and i think about a lot how the audience is part of the experience of art in the micro and macro even the internet as the audience changes how we interpret a piece. i'd go as far to say other external elements including price change interpretation. i think there is something to be said about embracing all elements of the experience outside of black and white, and even accepting (cont.)

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axayacatl 3 days ago

our morals and feelings of disgust and misery as part of this "substance" that is sought after. art is powerful because it summons and invokes things. i think people tend to rob themselves of the "substance" they seek by seeing themselves as separate from it

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letslearntogether 3 days ago

Indeed. We could say the same about the relationship between judgment and compassion in general. Condemnation makes one indifferent to another's suffering and simultaneously becomes a repression of one's own.

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sometimes i post sketches on bluesky that i don't post here either right away or at all, my blsky domain is the same as my neocities if youre interested โ›ง_< link is also in my about page
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if ur interested in a 20 dollar character sketch commission hmu through my email ! need the $ so i can get my guitar out of the shop for neck repairs
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axayacatl 4 days ago

my zine "the resin" is also still available on itch.io for 5 smeckles

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axayacatl 5 days ago

my self care routines

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letslearntogether 4 days ago

Careful reflection upon virtue brings Self-awareness, and each moment presents an opportunity to act from that constructiveness. Thus, life itself becomes a meditation...heh, I sound like a fortune cookie.

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letslearntogether 4 days ago

Personally, "a fool focuses on what he lacks, while the wise accomplish much with little," is a lesson that I continue to learn. I do not want to squander or take for granted even the seemingly smallest of treasures, like time.

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letslearntogether 4 days ago

...Anyhoo, thank you for sharing your thoughts and routines! Helpful stuff.

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axayacatl 4 days ago

@letslearntogether i agree on your take! i think a reflective life is the core of mindfulness. i think it's good to fully saturate yourself in the present by falling into the mind and body, meditation helps me open up neural pathways that make that easier on a day to day

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can u recommend me a book to read tht u think i'd enjoy
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mental-labour 5 days ago

i'd have to see what books you like first lol

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axayacatl 5 days ago

i want to read something that feels like i am living in a medieval plague either literally or esoterically

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mental-labour 4 days ago

Hard to Be a God but you might actually like the film more

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sleepydawgs 4 days ago

@mental-labour that movie is insane

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letslearntogether 3 days ago

Haha! Mission accomplished. That is the most accurate recommendation I've ever seen.

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