I like getting to be the me now watching the past me. It’s almost a way of loving myself. Stroking the cheek of that girl with my understanding. Smoothing her hair in my mind’s eye.
“You’ve told me I’m supposed to be a married medical student on the way back from Cambodia. I’m wearing actual Chanel and two days ago had my labia waxed by a woman with hands bigger than yours. My fake husband just dropped a ring box onto the console between us and said, ‘There you go.’ And you want me to be serious?”
sickening that jeremy thinks about changing his last name. sickening that they gave jabberwocky the moreau surname. there will be three j. moreaus. jean can build a caring family under the moreau name in elodie’s memory.
The other 10% of the time, Neil is still important enough to keep around, and Andrew will deal with his idiocy as long as he has to.
9% of the time he thinks killing Neil might be the one thing he can’t come back from, the one thing it might hurt to lose.
7~8% of the time it feels like falling, and to a man afraid of heights it is a terrible and frightening sensation.
The more he falls for Neil the more he hates Neil, because Neil is the one thing in the world that could destroy him, and Andrew isn’t ready for that.
He just doesn’t realize yet he’s too late to stop it.
