Complicated parent relationship

There are four different types of emotionally immature parents, but at the root of each type is poor emotional development, a lack of relational skills, self-centeredness, and a struggle to develop deep emotional intimacy with their children. If you have an emotionally immature parent, it is wise to exercise discernment regarding the things you share with them. Have boundaries, and remember that some things are not your parents’ business.

There are four different types of emotionally immature parents, but at the root of each type is poor emotional development, a lack of relational skills, self-centeredness, and a struggle to develop deep emotional intimacy with their children. If you have an emotionally immature parent, it is wise to exercise discernment regarding the things you share with them. Have boundaries, and remember that some things are not your parents’ business.

In my consulting room I am often not just sitting with a couple who are experiencing difficulties in their relationship but often with a couple who metaphorically bring their parents with them to every session and spend more time talking about their relationship with them than about their own couple situation. This chronic intrusiveness by in-laws […]

"I’m literally sick from living that way. The guilt of self care is gut-wrenching."