Barbara Morrison, who writes under the name B. Morrison, is an engineer, poet, writer, publisher, freelance editor, teacher, and dancer. Morrison was once a welfare mother, and she shares that difficult experience in this book.
Author Barbara Morrison
*****
Growing up in the upper-class enclave of Roland Park, Maryland in the 1950s and 1960s, Barbara Morrison frequently heard her conservative parents talk about 'worthless' people on welfare.
Residential Street in Roland Park, Maryland
Poor neighborhood in Baltimore, Maryland
Barbara's father was a doctor; her mother was a stay-at-home-mom; and Barbara was the second of six children. The family was well-off, but Barbara was a sad and lonely child; she felt disliked by her parents and distant from her siblings.
According to Barbara, her mother - who'd been a nurse - was an unhappy housewife and mother who often sported bruises inflicted by her husband. And Barbara's father, well-respected professionally, was cold at home, especially to Barbara. Later on, Barbara's father was glad to pay for his sons' expensive university educations, but was much less generous to Barbara, who was 'only a woman.' In any case, Barbara attended college in Maryland and Massachusetts, and graduated with a degree in English from Clark University in Worster.
Clark University in Worster, Massachusetts
Growing up in a dysfunctional household, it's perhaps not surprising that Barbara rebelled. Barbara married a hippie named Lewis, who lived in a flowered school bus and had custody of his 4-year-old son Kevin.
Hippie School Bus/Home
Lewis was the exact antithesis of an 'acceptable spouse' to Barbara's parents, who became increasingly estranged from their daughter. In fact, Barbara wasn't even welcome to visit Roland Park, because she might 'infect' her younger siblings.
Meanwhile, Barbara and Lewis lived hand-to-mouth in Worster, Massachusetts, and were thrown into dire straits when their son Jeremy was born. Constant arguments ensued, and when Barbara got pregnant again, Lewis left her. Barbara was almost penniless, and Lewis threatened to sue for custody if Barbara tried to get child support. Though the idea of public assistance was anathema to Barbara, she HAD to apply for welfare.
A welfare office
In Barbara's words, "I may not look like what you would expect when you think of a welfare mother, but indeed I was on welfare. When I was 24, I was a very scared young woman. I had been abandoned by my husband and disowned by my parents. I had a baby, and I was pregnant again. I had no money and I had no job. So I had a lot of very serious decisions to make."
Barbara's mantra was "The kids come first. The kids come first. Every decision had to be based on what was right for my children, Jeremy and this new baby."
Luckily, Barbara had an artist friend named Jill, a mother with two children who was also on welfare. Jill had experience navigating the labyrinthine - and somewhat obstructionist - welfare system, and provided valuable advice to other women.
Barbara was VERY anxious about getting public assistance. She observes, "I had seen what it was like for my friend Jill. In return for food stamps and barely enough cash to pay rent on the cheapest apartment with the most minimal utilities, she was subject to surprise inspections from social workers who were entitled to criticize every aspect of her life. When she handed over food stamps at the 'Stop and Shop', the other shoppers inspected the contents of her cart, ready to condemn anything 'frivolous.' She often had to fight to keep her meager allotment from being cut at some administrator's whims, dependent on an office where social workers were told to act as if money were coming out of their own pockets." Barbara emphasizes that both she and Jill wanted to work, but it was impossible with children, because childcare would eat up their salaries.
Food Stamps
Barbara meticulously describes her welfare experience, depicting her day to day activities in great detail (too much detail at times). In any event, Barbara's tale would be instructive to people on public assistance. Barbara, Jill and several other women formed a kind of commune. The women got apartments close together, traded childcare services, worked at the local food bank, planted a vegetable garden in an empty lot, brought their children together to play, and generally assisted each other in every possible way. Still, life was VERY HARD.
It's sad to read about Barbara's travails. She had to ration her food stamps, and her family often lived on rice and beans, with potatoes thrown in once a week; fresh fruits, like bananas, were a luxury she couldn't afford; she often ran out of money between welfare checks; she couldn't afford lotion for her chapped hands; she could hardly afford to purchase her children clothes at Goodwill; she had to live in apartments that were fire hazards; she was required to use allotment vouchers for some household goods, which she wasn't permitted to choose for herself; she had trouble with both landlords and welfare administrators, and so on.
Both Barbara and Jill eventually managed to get small grants through the 'Comprehensive Education and Training Act' (which no longer exists) to help them prepare for jobs. Barbara taught creative writing in prisons and elsewhere, and took education classes when she could.
Barbara even managed to put some joy into her life by joining a Morris Dance group, and she writes a lot about this, as well as her love of writing, and the happiness engendered by her children, Jeremy and Justin.
Women's Morris Dance Group
Barbara eventually pulled herself up by her bootstraps and reconciled with her parents. In Barbara's words, "I did rejoin the work force after a few years as we all did because the average time on welfare has always been less than two years. And so after a few years when I was working again, I didn't tell anyone I had been on welfare. I felt the stigma too strongly, so I listened to my coworkers as they complained about greedy welfare moms ripping off the system, and I didn't want to say, as I could have, that welfare worked for me and the people I knew exactly the way it was supposed to. It kept us and the children alive during this little bit of time when we could not work."
Barbara Morrison
Barbara believes the current welfare system is even less supportive than the program in the 1970s, when she participated. Barbara notes that the 'Welfare Reform Act' reduced the amount of time you could be, by law, on welfare. Additionally, a lot of the training programs that helped Barbara train for a job and get the experience she needed for a job, are not around anymore, though there are some other job acts. Barbara observes, "People who are poor are increasingly being criminalized, and that's why I called the book 'Innocent', because not only was I very naive, I was very young, but I was made to feel like a criminal."
This book was published in two waves. A written edition came out in 2011, and an audiobook - with additional material - was issued in 2022.
Barbara Morrison with her book
I sympathize with mothers who are struggling financially, but I don't agree with their refusal to go after deadbeat fathers. Barbara gives various justifications for letting her shirker husband Lewis get away Scot-free, but (in my view) Lewis should have been taken to court, to prod him into providing some support Jeremy and Justin.
It's clear that impoverished people need welfare, and it's also clear that welfare recipients are often seen as slackers by other folks. Barbara's book doesn't address 'welfare fathers' but it might be interesting to hear some of their stories as well.
I found Barbara Morrison's narrative to be extremely enlightening, and I'd encourage welfare naysayers to read the book.
I listened to the audiobook, narrated by the author, who speaks very slowly and clearly.
Barbara Morrison
Thanks to Netgalley, B. Morrison, and Cottey House Press for a copy of the audiobook.
Rating: 4 stars
