y'all were asking why i was being seen for cognitive therapy and the short answer is that long covid had badly exacerbated a lot of my ADHD and Autism cognitive function issues
the long answer is today i walked outside, walked across the street to my red car, saw the windshield had been cracked terribly from one end to the other, burst into tears because i can't possibly afford a new windshield, said "it wasn't broken like ten minutes ago when I got home!" decided the children who lived in the house beside me must have done it because they play outside with random big toys all day, decided immediately i had no desire to follow up on it but that i only wished whoever broke it would have left a note, noticed one of the neighbors staring at me, realized i was going to be late to my appointment and i needed to stop fussing, got into the car, car smelled like cigarettes and i don't smoke, realized this wasn't my fucking car, realized the neighbor was staring at me because i was crying over his car (also red), and now i was in his car, got out, he said nothing, hoped he has a sense of humor, walked 10 feet to my car, deeply embarrassed.
BUT, my windshield isn't broken <3
i cant stop imagining looking outside and your neighbor you never really talk to but who you see every day just has one hand on your windshield and the other over his eyes, weeping. OF COURSE HE SAID NOTHING!!!!!