I'm part of a wood carving club and there are a lot of dads who are dripping with adhd/autism vibes who's special interest is wood carving.
One of the master skill level carvers who we'll call... Jim was working on a figure of a super heroine, who was frankly outrageously bodacious.
Several women in the club are uncomfortable with this. They tell me they wish he wouldn't carve stuff like that at the club. This is understandable. I felt a bit uneasy too. I ask if they told him, and they say no.
This goes on for months. He's at a point where he's carving the folds of her skin tight suit. It's shockingly impressive. A real
Giovanni Strazza with wood here. Many of the women in the club, (also boomers) have stopped talking to him because they're offended.
One afternoon I see a woman we'll call Karen approach him and have this conversation
Her: Wow that is really starting to look like actual fabric.
Him: Thanks! It's been a really fun challenge.
Her: I bet! She sure is - a lot- huh?
Him: Yeah a lot of these comic book characters are really outrageously proportioned!
Her: They really are! You know, when I was carving a sign that was political in a way i knew would offend some people here, I just felt so much more comfortable carving it at home.
Him: *nodding*
Her: Okay?
Him: Yeah I get that.
Her: Yeah. Okay. Good luck with her!"
*she walks off and he looks a little confused.*
Next week at the meet up Jims working on it again and Karen's furious. Says to me "He said he wouldn't bring it back! So RUDE."
So I go up to him and we have this conversation.
Me: Hey Jim
Him: Hey Neala
Me: Some of the ladies around here are feeling a little uncomfortable with the figure you're carving because of her massive cartoon titties.
Him: Ah shit, really? I thought they just thought it was funny.
Me: Yeah folks laugh a lot when they're uncomfortable and trying to hide it.
Him: Mm, yeah and I can never tell which laugh is which.
Me: Me either
Him: Well I won't work on this here anymore. I have other projects to do.
Me: Hey thanks! I wanna see it when you're done tho so take a pic for me, okay?
Him: Haha sure!
I go sit down. Karen is shocked. Jim puts the figure away and works on a carving of a crane instead. He is not upset.
A week later I over hear Karen telling her friend I screamed at Jim last week.