hey sorry it's just that i don't think i'm very good at being a person. thanks for letting me try with you, anyway.

the cats april fools pranked me by at some point in the night somehow opening the bin of treats* and absolutely gorging themselves. Like I discovered this because I could FEEL that their bellies were stuffed full when I petted them after I got out of bed and it made me suspicious. They've been in food comas all day so far. Not looking forward to the litter box situation.

like I’m pretty sure they gained a minimum 10% of their starting body mass these bellies are distended like a kitten full of milk. absurd.

Going on a date with a girl that does 6000% increased poison damage and 400% increased poison duration how much hp should I be rocking bc I got like 5.6k right now and I’m worried

It is a universal law of Online that the version of a post that goes viral and stands the test of time always has one more addition to it than the bit actually needs.

hey everyone its april fools. but dont worry i dont have anything planned. just going to sit here and...

I LIED !!!! GET PRANKED

POST BELOW ME GET FUCKING WET

Hey guys! Check out this block of pure sodium that I got!

2025 and we still don't have hairy women in movies. wild

Having anotheg 'gork we have got to get out of bed faster then this' morning

dasfsffadfjdag I meant girl but gork works better

I didn't even question it I was nodding along like I'm literally right there with you gork

thanks for posting things for me to look at

debilitating migraine today that tylenol + rizatriptan + ice + lying in a dark room for an hour have done absolutely nothing about, and I'm not supposed to take NSAIDs this close to my wrist surgery. this sucks so fucking bad this is such an unreasonable amount of pain to last this long no matter what I do to try to alleviate it

jsyk this is still an absolute nightmare. just an update.