Summer Bucket List

Dedication

To my Grams

Though your memories may fade,

I will carry your stories in my heart.

Always.

Chapter 1

Holland

Senior class, please rise, Emilia Santiago, the class president, announced to the cheers and applause of everyone in the stands.

I did as instructed, glancing into the crowd at my mom and dad, whose smiles could be seen a mile away. I was the last of the Monroe clan, the third kid, to finish high school. Come August their nest would be empty, and if I thought about it too much, I might cry. Instead, I turned to my left and smiled at Jeffery Morris, the guy who’d always been next to me for school functions——and this would be the last.

Graduates, with your left hand, move your tassel to the left, Emilia continued.

All four hundred of us made the symbolic move and waited for the official announcement.

Emilia stepped backward as Mr. Percival, the principal, approached the podium and cleared his throat.

Ladies and gentlemen, it’s my pleasure to present to you the graduating class of 2019.

It took only seconds for the sea of blue caps to be tossed into the air, mine included. A surge of pure exhilaration ran through me because I was finally done. While there were shouts and whistling from the stands, with my classmates it was hugs and smiles. My best friend, Megan, who was a few rows ahead of mine, turned around to find me and smiled.

We did it! she shouted as everyone around us continued to cheer.

I didn’t expect to be so emotional, but there I was, tears running down my face as the culmination of twelve years of hard work came to an end, the next chapter of my life only beginning. She walked toward me, greeting friends along the way until she reached me.

Are you crying? she asked, pulling me into a hug.

No, I lied with a laugh, returning the hug.

The chairs that we had sat in for the last two hours were scattered about the coliseum floor as all of our classmates found their friends. It probably looked like pure chaos, but no one cared.

Holland, I heard a familiar voice call out.

I turned to see Colin walking toward me.

He carried his blue cap in his hand, dodging people who were trying to find one another. My handsome friend, who I had known since I was three, reached us but stopped short and threw his arms up in the air. We did it!

Congratulations, I said, hugging him tightly.

You, too. He kissed the top of my head, like he always did, and then turned to Megan to hug her.

We need a picture, I said, pulling out my phone to take a selfie.

Meg and Colin stood on either side of me and we took several funny ones and one of us making sad faces. But my favorite was the one of them kissing my cheeks. Those two had been by my side for every major event. Through breakups, failed tests, fights with my sister, my acceptance into college, and everything in between, they were my people.

Okay, so what now? Colin asked as I finished taking some of him and Meg together.

I promised Mom and Dad we’d get something to eat after this was over. What about you two? I asked.

Same, Meg said. We’re still meeting up later?

Sounds good, I answered before turning to Colin. Want to come eat?

I would, but I told Chris we could do something before heading to Knox’s party. Are you still going? he asked.

Yep. We’ll be there later.

Okay, then I’ll see you later.

He kissed both of our cheeks before taking off to find Chris and the others. Megan and I would see each other after our respective dinners, so we hugged once more before walking off to find our parents. My classmates were still congratulating each other as I passed, a few of them stopping me along the way.

I didn’t expect to miss them, but as I said goodbye, I knew I would. I would miss walking the halls and talking to my friends. I would miss seeing Colin and Meg every day—they were my best friends in the world, and both would be leaving for college across the country. I would miss all of it.

And then I saw Blake.

My ex. I could confidently admit that I would not miss him. Not even for a second.

I briefly looked around to see if there was another path I could take, but unfortunately, it was not promising. To get to my family I would have to pass by the jerk I had wasted five months on. Luckily, he was talking to his best friend and new girlfriend, so maybe he would stay distracted long enough for me to pass.

Damn it, I groaned under my breath, dipping my head so we wouldn’t make eye contact. As I started to walk, my arm brushed against someone else, but before I could speak, he did.

Excuse me? the low voice said.

I’m sorry, I said absently as I turned to see who I had run into, only to see Milo Davis’ dark brown eyes boring into me, his typical brooding scowl in place.

I sighed, ready for the usual banter we’d always shared. I had never had a problem with Milo, and I didn’t think he had a problem with me, but he had always alternated between sarcastic and annoyed when it came to me. I never could tell if he was giving me a hard time or if he just hated me.

Milo was tall, with dark brown hair and a smile that, when it was the right smile, would cause a dimple would appear. There were times I found myself staring at the small scar beneath his eyebrow, the one that made him look slightly dangerous. I always wished I knew the story behind the scar, but since it was a mystery, I had imagined it was from dirt biking or some other daredevil event. Since we never really talked about anything other than school, there was little I knew about him and I was left to create a profile that I liked. He was attractive in that artsy, I don’t give a damn sort of way. Not that Milo was actually artsy at all. I had worked with him on enough projects to know that engineering was what he liked.

Standing in front of me, he had his usually messy hair brushed out of his eyes, and I was mesmerized because I could see him...and how handsome he looked.

Not you. Sorry, I stammered.

Of course not, he muttered before rolling his eyes and turning his back to me.

For four years we had shared annoyed glares directed at each other and our classmates. I heard the scoffs and grunts whenever I spoke, and the snide remarks that he thought no one else heard.

But I was aware of them all. And each time, I pretended not to notice.

Before I thought better of it, I reached out my hand, placed it on his arm, and gave a gentle tug so he would face me. As he turned toward me, he looked at where my hand touched his arm and then his eyes met mine.

Milo, not sure if I ever did anything to make you dislike me...

He opened his mouth to speak, but I kept talking.

...but I just wanted to tell you congratulations and wish you luck.

I dropped my hand from his arm and took a step away as I flashed a smile. I would miss the sarcastic banter we had engaged in, and I had always hoped that maybe we would be friends, but it had never come to pass.

As I walked backward, Milo disappearing in the crowd, I had started to slowly turn around when I caught the hint of a lopsided smile from him. It felt like a small triumph that came too late, but I still counted it as a win. I turned around, weirdly pleased that a smile could make me feel so good, forgetting that my whole mission was to avoid Blake.

Hey, Holland, Blake said when I ran right into his toned, football-playing chest.

I swallowed hard and took a step back, looking at him and his girlfriend Sammi.

Um, hey, I managed to say as my heart thudded in my chest.

We had broken up a month earlier, and while I was still single, he had managed to pick up his new girlfriend within days of the breakup. Since I was in all honors classes and he...wasn’t...I rarely saw him and had been able to successfully avoid him when the chance arose. I knew the day would come when I would have to face him, and it was time to rip off the Band-Aid.

Congratulations on the scholarship, I said. Full ride?

Nah, just the first year. We’ll see how that goes.

Well, good luck, I said, and then turned to Sammi. You, too.

Thanks. I— she started to say when I interrupted her.

Sorry, my mom is right over there looking for me. I looked at Blake one last time and smiled——my own silent goodbye to the guy I once thought I loved. Good luck.

Before he could respond, I made my way over to my mom, who could not seem to stop smiling. Her eyes were red with unshed tears, but I knew she was saving those for August when I moved two hundred miles away for college.

Baby girl! I’m so proud of you, she gushed when I was finally in front of her.

Thanks, Mom, I said, looking around for the rest of the family.

They’re already at the restaurant. Dad told them to meet us there.

And where’s Dad?

Right here, honey, he said, handing me a bouquet of flowers. Congratulations, Holland. We’re so proud of you.

Thanks, Daddy.

Did I see you and Blake talking? he asked.

Mom elbowed his stomach and he looked from her to me, confused at his obvious gaffe.

It’s okay, Mom. Yes, I accidentally ran into him, so I had to make small talk.

How was that?

Awkward. But at least I don’t have to see him again, I answered, thankful that it was the truth.

Who was that other boy I saw you talking to? Mom asked.

I turned around and looked down at the crowd that had begun to scatter and spotted Milo talking with two other people. I found myself staring a little longer than I should, but he was smiling and enjoying himself. Milo rarely smiled. If he did, I was certain more girls would have taken notice of him, because it lit up his whole face.

Holland? she asked, snapping me back into the conversation.

That was Milo.

The same Milo you were always griping about? she asked.

Yep. Just wished him luck. That was it.

Well, that was sweet of you.

Trust me, it went in one ear and out the other, I scoffed.

I don’t think so, Mom said. I mean, I watched after you walked away, and he didn’t stop staring at you.

He didn’t? I asked.

Mom smiled at me and Dad looked at the floor as if trying to locate the subject of our current conversation.

What does that mean? Dad questioned, looking between Mom and me.

Nothing, I said. Nothing at all.

I looked back down at the remaining crowd, unable to find Milo. I had gotten a smile, but I was certain Mom was imagining the prolonged stare. I had always been pretty certain that when it came to me, Milo was not a fan.

Come on, Mom said. Let’s go meet up with everyone.

I looked back one last time and noticed Milo across the room near an exit. He stood alone, and it almost seemed as though he was looking at me. Maybe even smiling.

But two smiles in one day was unheard of. Three, impossible.

TO HOLLAND, DAD ANNOUNCED, lifting up his glass of water, everyone else following suit.

Dad, I groaned, hating the attention.

What? he laughed. You’re the last Monroe to graduate. Before long, you’ll be out of the house and making decisions on your own.

Hasn’t she always done that? Mom teased. Remember when she was five and she walked into the living room when we were watching TV? She stood in front of us and said that from now on, she would no longer eat meat. She was so cute, I almost didn’t have the heart to tell her that hot dogs were made of meat.

But you did, I laughed. And then I cried because I didn’t want to give up hot dogs.

Yeah, that lasted all of five minutes. Ben, my older brother grinned. But what about the time she wanted to stay up all night and watch TV?

I remember that, Marcie gasped before laughing. Mom said that it was okay.

I thought for sure she’d fall asleep watching a movie, Mom said, shaking her head.

But I didn’t.

And Mom was pissed, Marcie added, and then did her best Mom impersonation. Holland Nicole Monroe! Don’t you ever stay up late like that again. Do you hear me?

Mom burst into giggles at Marcie’s impression as she tried to deny it, but we all knew it to be true.

I was seven, I said. I was just trying to see if I could do it.

And clearly you could, Dad said. See, this is what I’m talking about. With all three of you gone, what are your mother and I going to have around to entertain us?

You and Mom are like the perfect couple, I said sweetly. I’m sure the two of you will be just fine.

Well, we’ve all had to hear how empty the house is when we leave. Now it’s your turn, Marcie said as she gave me her most sympathetic look.

Dad, cut her a break, Ben interjected. Holland can’t handle that guilt like Marse and me.

Yeah, listen to him, I said, patting my brother’s back. Ben knows how fragile I am.

His fiancée Harper laughed and leaned her head on Ben’s shoulder. She was the first girlfriend that he had brought around that we all liked, so when he had decided to propose, we were thrilled.

What’s the plan for the summer? Harper asked.

Getting things packed. Work. The usual.

Holland, she said, shaking her head. You’re the most responsible eighteen-year-old I know. Maybe you could just relax and enjoy your last summer before you start being an adult.

No rest for the wicked, Marcie said with a laugh. Besides, I’ve never known Holland to just sit still. Ever.

I did decide to work at the country club. Tips are better, the hours aren’t too bad, and I can use the pool on my off days.

When did you decide this? Mom asked, as well as the rest of the eyes that were on me. And why am I just hearing about it now?

I dropped off an application yesterday and they called me this morning before the ceremony. They want me to start tomorrow.

Wow. But you loved working at Grady’s, Marcie said.

It’s not a big deal. I can always go back to the diner if I want. Ms. Meadows is always looking for help. But the hours and tips are better at the club.

It’s sort of the end of an era, Marcie said. You’ve been working there since you were sixteen.

I know.

Are you sure this is what you want? she asked, her mothering tone beginning to surface.

My sister was two years older than me, but always thought of me as a child. Sometimes I wanted to yell at her to stop treating me like a kid, but for the most part I just let it go.

Yes. Now, can we change the subject? I asked, taking a sip of my drink.

Luckily, there was no need to make a big deal about anything because the food came out just in time to be the perfect distraction. The waitstaff set the food in front of us, and the first minute that followed was spent in wonderful silence, each of us enjoying our meal.

What time are you and Megan getting together? Dad asked.

Seven, I answered after swallowing a mouthful of food. I’m staying at her house, if that’s okay.

Fine with me. Just be sure to text us when you get home, Dad said.

Marcie opened her mouth to object, but she was silenced with a glare from Mom. I looked at my sister and smirked, because I knew she was about to bring up the fact that she had not been allowed to do anything on her graduation night. Granted, she had spent the night before drinking so much that she had bloodshot eyes in her graduation photos. Mom and Dad were pissed about that one.

I’ll do one better and text you from the party to let you know we made it, I said, ever the annoying sister that Marcie deemed me to be.

Chapter 2

Holland

Mr. Clarke held the door open as I walked in, and gave me a warm hug. The Clarkes were like my second family, and they were always expecting my arrival. I did not get to see them at the graduation ceremony because they had their own plans with Meg. There was never a time that felt anything other than loved in the Clarke home.

We’re so proud of you, Mr. Clarke said.

Is that Holland? Mrs. Clarke asked from the kitchen.

Now who else would it be? I teased.

She walked into the living room wearing her biggest smile as she pulled me into her arms. Her hugs always relaxed me; it was like she had some magical power that had the ability to make me feel calm.

We have a little something for you, she said as she loosened her embrace. Honey, can you get the bag off the counter?

Mr. Clarke disappeared for a moment and returned with a small gift bag with silver tissue paper sticking out from the top. He wrapped his arm around his wife and they smiled while they waited for me to open the bag. When I finally did, inside I found a silver keychain with a picture of Meg and me when we were little girls. I smiled as I studied the image, vividly remembering our trip to the zoo. I looked at Meg’s parents and grinned.

Turn it over, Mrs. Clarke said, smiling eagerly.

When I did, I saw a picture of the two of us from a month earlier. Our faces were smooshed together as we hugged tightly, the biggest grins on our faces.

You two are the best, I said, pulling them both to me as I hugged them.

It’s nothing big, but we thought you two would like to have something to keep with you, even when you can’t be together. We gave Meg hers earlier.

I love it. Thank you.

Holland? Is that you? Meg shouted from her room.

Yeah! I called out.

C’mon up.

Be right there.

How was your dinner? Mrs. Clarke asked.

Great, I answered. I went home and even took a little nap.

Mr. Clarke laughed and shook his head. Something tells me you two are going to be late getting home.

We’ll be quiet, I said over my shoulder as I walked to Meg’s room.

Do you really think we won’t hear? he laughed.

Go on up, Mrs. Clarke said, playfully swatting at her husband’s shoulder.

I walked up to Meg’s room and found her sitting in front of her vanity fixing her hair. She was wearing a new shirt that we had bought the weekend before and her favorite ripped jeans. She was never one to wear much makeup, so I was surprised to see her completely