Annabel's Reviews > Spare

Putting my own personal thoughts on the monarchy aside, (and the fact that I'm nosy), Prince Harry's "controversial" and "highly anticipated" memoir, Spare, portrays himself as a person, who is breaking generational trauma and a toxic family dynamic (because they should "never complain, never explain").

As a lover of history, none of what Harry describes shocked me, because he grew up in an institution that has - historically - been racist, oppressive and imperialist. Centuries worth of history is really shining through in twenty-first century Britain.

Spare bared the similarities to the famous Burn Book from Mean Girls, because the amount of names and gossip that Harry exposes... It is quite unbelievable how much of this great gossip comes from ugly and uncovered truths.

Throughout Spare, loss and trauma play a dominant role. His poignant memories of his mother, Diana, Princess of Wales, and finding that "mummy’s been in a car crash... They tried, darling boy. I’m afraid she didn’t make it", were completely heartbreaking to read, particularly because I am someone who never got to experience the life of Diana when she was alive. The paparazzi slander in relation to Diana was intense, it is only right to feel anger when public figures are horrifically violated against having their own privacy. When Harry particularly writes that "they can’t break me, I thought. Is it, I wondered, because I’m already broken?", this highlighted the greater impact of the paparazzi on his mental health as a child.

Unfortunately, Harry doesn’t write very well, which made the memoir feel poorly executed and ill thought - if anything, there were certain details that, I felt, caused more damage than good, as it gave a glimpse of Harry's taste for drama.

For me, his memories of Diana were undermined by petty point-scoring in William and Harry's sibling rivalry. In several startling confessions of their physical rifts, it proved that this picture perfect family was crumbling behind the scenes. But as "Willy and I would turn on each other", I couldn't stop thinking about how William was constantly being presented as the arch nemesis, whilst Harry is the victim. Even when Harry discusses his brother's appearance in the prologue - the "alarming baldness... His famous resemblance to Mummy, which was fading with time" - it felt quite childish and petty, given that Harry mentioned in his recent interview with Tom Bradby that he hoped for reconciliation (not sure that will happen now though, Harry).

He spared (haha sorry) us no details on his very intimate moments - from losing his virginity, to having a frostbitten penis, even doing mushrooms at Courteney Cox's house - all of which were... Odd to read, but I suppose since Harry had been silenced for so long, everything had to be spewed out.

Harry admits that he killed 25 Taliban members during his time as a soldier in Afghanistan, which can be seen as victorious for some, however, this can be hugely damaging, not only to the Royal Family, but to veterans and current soldiers.

There will always be controversy over his decision to publish this memoir. When reading, a part of me felt like he needed more intense therapy sessions, rather than spilling all his trauma onto a 400+ page book, but another part of me cannot help but think how liberating this was for Harry. With every page turned in Spare, you cannot help but feel as though your heart breaks for him. I am glad he got to tell his story (as a memoir, but I think he released far too many podcasts, Netflix documentaries and interviews that pretty much say the same stuff), regardless, I still highly recommend.