I've watched every film in the Alien franchise several times over the years. Each of them, in their own ways, has something unique to bring - and each of them, in their own ways, still succeeds in all the essential stakes: the characterisation, the performances, the cinematography, the quality of the writing and direction, the effects... and that sense of jeopardy that grows and grows, like the alien monster itself, almost from the first scene.
So I had no hesitation actually buying this instead of renting it, given the strength of its heritage. It's twenty quid, sadly, that I'll never see again. I'd have been better off putting it on a 500-to-1 outsider in a pram race.
Within 5 minutes, I knew how bad it was. Dreadful dialogue, trying to be so sharp and cool in appealing to the Gen-Z TikTok-aholics who'll doubtlessly make up its main audience. I think it was actually written by one of them. A teen, certainly. Either that or they just picked up a bunch of street kids from South London and got them to improvise all the way through it. Dreadful, empty, dull characters with not a single one to feel sympathy for or root for. No sense at all of drama or jeopardy. And, given the decades of advances in CGI, AI and other film-making tech since the original (which holds its own even now), this still managed to look like it was filmed in a warehouse on an industrial estate in Benfleet.
40 minutes was enough for me... and I only got that far because I was hoping to see some of these dumb-clucks smashed to bits by the monsters and at least find some sense of my moneysworth that way. But no... I couldn't even make it that far.
How the hell can Ridley Scott allow his name to be attached to this heap of garbage? Does he need the money.
Cailiee Spaeney caught my eye in 'Civil War' as an upcoming talent to watch out for. But she was completely wasted in this. And she was the only talent in it. And that includes not only cast, but crew too.
I implore all Alien franchise devotees... please... just pretend this one doesn't exist.
You won't miss anything.
So I had no hesitation actually buying this instead of renting it, given the strength of its heritage. It's twenty quid, sadly, that I'll never see again. I'd have been better off putting it on a 500-to-1 outsider in a pram race.
Within 5 minutes, I knew how bad it was. Dreadful dialogue, trying to be so sharp and cool in appealing to the Gen-Z TikTok-aholics who'll doubtlessly make up its main audience. I think it was actually written by one of them. A teen, certainly. Either that or they just picked up a bunch of street kids from South London and got them to improvise all the way through it. Dreadful, empty, dull characters with not a single one to feel sympathy for or root for. No sense at all of drama or jeopardy. And, given the decades of advances in CGI, AI and other film-making tech since the original (which holds its own even now), this still managed to look like it was filmed in a warehouse on an industrial estate in Benfleet.
40 minutes was enough for me... and I only got that far because I was hoping to see some of these dumb-clucks smashed to bits by the monsters and at least find some sense of my moneysworth that way. But no... I couldn't even make it that far.
How the hell can Ridley Scott allow his name to be attached to this heap of garbage? Does he need the money.
Cailiee Spaeney caught my eye in 'Civil War' as an upcoming talent to watch out for. But she was completely wasted in this. And she was the only talent in it. And that includes not only cast, but crew too.
I implore all Alien franchise devotees... please... just pretend this one doesn't exist.
You won't miss anything.