John Donne: Poems Summary and Analysis of "A Valediction: Forbidding Mourning"

The poet begins by comparing the love between his beloved and himself with the passing
away of virtuous men. Such men expire so peacefully that their friends cannot determine
when they are truly dead. Likewise, his beloved should let the two of them depart in peace,
not revealing their love to “the laity.”

Earthquakes bring harm and fear about the meaning of the rupture, but such fears should not
affect his beloved because of the firm nature of their love. Other lovers become fearful when
distance separates them—a much greater distance than the cracks in the earth after a quake—
since for them, love is based on the physical presence or attractiveness of each other. Yet for
the poet and his beloved, such a split is “innocent,” like the movements of the heavenly
spheres, because their love transcends mere physicality.

Indeed, the separation merely adds to the distance covered by their love, like a sheet of gold,
hammered so thin that it covers a huge area and gilds so much more than a love concentrated
in one place ever could.

He finishes the poem with a longer comparison of himself and his wife to the two legs of a
compass. They are joined at the top, and she is perfectly grounded at the center point. As he
travels farther from the center, she leans toward him, and as he travels in his circles, she
remains firm in the center, making his circles perfect.

Analysis
The first two of the nine abab stanzas of “A Valediction: Forbidding Mourning” make up a
single sentence, developing the simile of the passing of a virtuous man as compared to the
love between the poet and his beloved. It is thought that Donne was in fact leaving for a long
journey and wished to console and encourage his beloved wife by identifying the true
strength of their bond. The point is that they are spiritually bound together regardless of the
earthly distance between them.
He begins by stating that the virtuous man leaves life behind so delicately that even his
friends cannot clearly tell the difference. Likewise, Donne forbids his wife from openly
mourning the separation. For one thing, it is no real separation, like the difference between a
breath and the absence of a breath. For another thing, mourning openly would be a
profanation of their love, as the spiritual mystery of a sacrament can be diminished by
revealing the details to “the laity” (line 8). Their love is sacred, so the depth of meaning in his
wife’s tears would not be understood by those outside their marriage bond, who do not love
so deeply. When Donne departs, observers should see no sign from Donne’s wife to suggest
whether Donne is near or far because she will be so steadfast in her love for him and will go
about her business all the same.

The third stanza suggests that the separation is like the innocent movement of the heavenly
spheres, many of which revolve around the center. These huge movements, as the planets
come nearer to and go farther from one another, are innocent and do not portend evil. How
much less, then, would Donne’s absence portend. All of this is unlike the worldly fear that
people have after an earthquake, trying to determine what the motions and cleavages mean.

In the fourth and fifth stanzas, Donne also compares their love to that of “sublunary” (earth-
bound) lovers and finds the latter wanting. The love of others originates from physical
proximity, where they can see each other’s attractiveness. When distance intervenes, their
love wanes, but this is not so for Donne and his beloved, whose spiritual love, assured in each
one’s “mind,” cannot be reduced by physical distance like the love of those who focus on
“lips, and hands.”

The use of “refined” in the fifth stanza gives Donne a chance to use a metaphor involving
gold, a precious metal that is refined through fire. In the sixth stanza, the separation is
portrayed as actually a bonus because it extends the territory of their love, like gold being
hammered into “aery thinness” without breaking (line 24). It thus can gild that much more
territory.

The final three stanzas use an extended metaphor in which Donne compares the two
individuals in the marriage to the two legs of a compass: though they each have their own
purpose, they are inextricably linked at the joint or pivot at the top—that is, in their spiritual
unity in God. Down on the paper—the earthly realm—one leg stays firm, just as Donne’s
wife will remain steadfast in her love at home. Meanwhile the other leg describes a perfect
circle around this unmoving center, so long as the center leg stays firmly grounded and does
not stray. She will always lean in his direction, just like the center leg of the compass. So
long as she does not stray, “Thy firmness makes my circle just, / And makes me end where I
begun,” back at home (lines 35-36). They are a team, and so long as she is true to him, he will
be able to return to exactly the point where they left off before his journey.

Summary With an Explanation of the Title

.......In 1611, John Donne wrote "A Valediction: Forbidding Mourning" to his wife, Anne
More Donne, to comfort her while he sojourned in France on government business and she
remained home in Mitcham, England, about seven miles from London. The title says, in
essence, "When we part, we must not mourn." Valediction comes from the Latin
verb valedicere, meaning to bid farewell. (Another English word derived from the same Latin
verb is valedictorian, referring to a student scholar who delivers a farewell address at a
graduation ceremony.) The poem then explains that a maudlin show of emotion would
cheapen their love, reduce it to the level of the ordinary and mundane. Their love, after all, is
transcendant, heavenly. Other husbands and wives who know only physical, earthly love,
weep and sob when they separate for a time, for they dread the loss of physical closeness. But
because Donne and his wife have a spiritual as well as physical dimension to their love, they
will never really be apart, he says. Their souls will remain united–even though their bodies
are separated–until he returns to England.

John and Anne More Donne

.......John Donne (1572-1631) was one of England's greatest and most innovative poets. He
worked for a time as secretary to Sir Thomas Edgerton, the Keeper of the Great Seal of
England. When he fell in love with Anne More (1584-1617), the niece of Edgerton's second
wife, he knew Edgerton and Ann's father–Sir George More, Chancellor of the Garter–would
disapprove of their marriage. Nevertheless, he married her anyway, in 1601, the year she
turned 17. As a result, he lost his job and was jailed for a brief time. Life was hard for them
over the next decade, but in 1611 Sir Robert Drury befriended him and took Donne on a
diplomatic mission with him to France and other countries. Donne's separation from his wife
at this time provided him the occasion for writing "A Valediction: Forbidding Mourning."
.......Anne bore him twelve children–five of whom died very young or at birth–before she
died in 1617.

Figures of Speech

Metaphor

.......Donne relies primarily on extended metaphors to convey his message. First, he compares
his separation from his wife to the separation of a man's soul from his body when he dies
(first stanza). The body represents physical love; the soul represents spiritual or intellectual
love. While Donne and his wife are apart, they cannot express physical love; thus, they are
like the body of the dead man. However, Donne says, they remain united spiritually and
intellectually because their souls are one. So, Donne continues, he and his wife should let
their physical bond "melt" when they part (line 5).
.......He follows that metaphor with others, saying they should not cry sentimental "tear-
floods" or indulge in "sigh-tempests" (line 6) when they say farewell. Such base
sentimentality would cheapen their relationship. He also compares himself and his wife to
celestial spheres, such as the sun and others stars, for their love is so profound that it exists in
a higher plane than the love of husbands and wives whose relationship centers solely on
physical pleasures which, to be enjoyed, require that the man and woman always remain
together, physically.
.......Finally, Donne compares his relationship with his wife to that of the two legs of a
drawing compass. Although the legs are separate components of the compass, they are both
part of the same object. The legs operate in unison. If the outer leg traces a circle, the inner
leg–though its point is fixed at the center–must pivot in the direction of the outer leg. Thus,
Donne says, though he and his wife are separated, like the legs of the compass, they remain
united because they are part of the same soul.

Paradox

.......In the sixth stanza, Donne begins a paradox, noting that his and his wife's souls are one
though they be two; therefore, their souls will always be together even though they are apart.

Simile

.......Stanza 6 also presents a simile, comparing the expansion of their souls to the expansion
of beaten gold.

Alliteration

.......Donne also uses alliteration extensively. Following are examples:

Whilst some of their sad friends do say (line 3)

.......Real, complete love unites not only the bodies of a husband and wife but also their souls.
Such spiritual love is transcendent, metaphysical, keeping the lovers together intellectually
and spiritually even though the circumstances of everyday life may separate their bodies.

Rhyme Scheme and Meter

End rhyme occurs in the first and third lines of each stanza and in the second and fourth lines.
The meter is iambic tetrameter, with eight syllables (four feet) per line. Each foot, or pair of
syllables, consists of an unstressed syllable followed by a stressed syllable. The first two lines
of the second stanza demonstrate this metric pattern:

....1...... . ..2........... ....3.................4