How To Become A Better Person in 12 Steps
How To Become A Better Person in 12 Steps
How To Become A Better Person in 12 Steps
Person in 12 Steps
Gratitude
Greeting others
Digital detox
Self-talk
Kindness
Mindful eating
Sleep
Deep breathing
Tidying
Forgiveness
Self-care
Self-love
Takeaway
It’s normal to feel like you could be doing more when it comes to self-
improvement. But being a better person doesn’t involve being overly hard on
yourself. In fact, it’s quite the opposite.
The more self-kindness and self-compassion you can foster, the more
equipped you’ll be to treat those around you the same way. Plus, doing good
for others can give your life a deeper sense of meaning. It may even help to
improve your physical and mental health.
Here’s a look at some ways to build self-improvement into your daily routine
and let go of negative thoughts about yourself.
1. Cultivate gratitude
You’ve probably heard it a million times, but keeping a gratitude journal of
what you’re thankful for can have a big effect on your mindset. Research has
shown that incorporating gratitude into your daily life can help ward off stress,
improve sleep, and cultivate more positive social relationships.
GIFT TECHNIQUE
When thinking about things you’re grateful for, look for instances of:
When listing things you’re grateful for, notes Hennings, make sure to also note
why that thing makes you grateful.
2. Greet everyone you meet
Whether you nod or smile to strangers passing by or say “good morning” to
everyone who enters the office, make an effort to acknowledge those around
you when you see them, says psychologist Madeleine Mason Roantree.
In doing so, you’ll notice might find yourself feeling more present and
connected to those around you, even if you don’t have a close relationship
with them.
Instead, try going for a walk and connecting with your thoughts.
Step away from your phone either for a few hours or even take the entire day
off of devices. Instead, try getting outside and connecting with nature, or
meeting up with friends IRL. Remember: Even a short break from your phone
can help you unwind and focus on what brings you joy.
The next time you find yourself feeling incompetent or overwhelmed, try telling
yourself:
“I know this change is going to be challenging, but I’ve put a lot of meaningful
thought into it and have considered all the options open to me [fact], so I feel
confident I am doing the best I can in this moment [optimism].”
The hard part is catching yourself in the act of negative thinking and
intentionally deciding to think differently. But with a bit of practice, this will get
easier.
“You’ll notice your mood lift a little when you do good for the sheer joy of it,”
says Roantree. StudiesTrusted Source show that simply counting acts of
kindness for one week can boost happiness and gratitude.
Mindful eating gives you a chance to check in with both your physical feelings
and your emotions.
Pick a meal, even if it’s just a sandwich, and take your time eating it. Notice
the different tastes and textures. “It’s a type of mini meditation that can act as
a simple ‘de-stressor,’” says Roantree.
Find ways to improve the quality of your sleep by reducing your caffeine
consumption late in the day, taking a melatonin supplement, or relaxing in a
warm bath or shower before bedtime.
Check out these other tips for getting a better night’s rest.
8. Breathe consciously
Take a moment at the bus stop, in line at the grocery store, or before nodding
off to sleep to focus on your breathing. Practicing even a few minutes a day
of deep breathing has been shown to jumpstart our body’s relaxation
response and regulate stress.
The next time you have a spare 30 minutes, set a timer and tackle some quick
household chores that’ll add a little brightness to your day, such as:
Similarly, make sure you’re exercising or mindfully moving your body, taking
time to connect with others, and having some relaxation or down time for
yourself.
These don’t need to be time-consuming endeavors. Look for quick 10- or 20-
minute pockets of time in your day where you can head outside for a walk or
prepare yourself a bowl of fresh fruit.
12. Be kind to yourself
Many of us have the habit of lingering on something that was said to us,
replaying it often in our minds. Instead of taking things personally and being
self-critical, Jackson recommends offering empathy and understanding to the
other person, as well as ourselves.
Think of all the ways you make a positive impact to those around you and try
writing them down each day. Again, these don’t have to be grand gestures.
Maybe you held the door open for someone carrying some heavy bags. Or
started brewing a fresh pot of coffee at work when you noticed it was getting
low.
If you find you’re still struggling to change your frame of mind, Jackson
advises to think of it this way: “Tomorrow is a new day, so if you beat yourself
up today about something, let yourself off the hook and start fresh tomorrow.”
Try to treat yourself the same way you would a loved one. Would you
constantly talk down to your best friend if they had an “off” day and dropped
the ball on something?
Hopefully not. And you shouldn’t talk to yourself that way, either.
Keep in mind that there are many ways to become a better person, and those
offered here are just a few. Find what feels most joyous and nurturing and try
to build them into your daily life.