‫بسم هللا الرحمن الرحيم‬

Al Adab Al Mufrad (‫)األدب المفرد‬

Al Adab Al Mufrad (‫ – )األدب المفرد‬Being Dutiful to the Parents (‫ – )بر الوالدين‬Class #1

Introduction

 The book Al Adab Al Mufrad is complied by Al Bukhari and it is about the Individual’s Manners. We
ask Allah (swt) to grant us the good manners. Ameen.
 Islam came to perfect the manners and the Prophet (‫ )ﷺ‬is upon great manners.
 First we need to have manners with Allah (swt), then with the Prophet (‫)ﷺ‬, then with the people.
This book is telling us about manners with the people.
 You have manners with Allah (swt) when you worship Him, when you watch your actions, when you
love Him. Manners with the Prophet (‫ )ﷺ‬are to take him as an example, which is follow his
Sunnah, not go against it. Doing bida’a shows no manners with the Prophet (‫)ﷺ‬.
 Manners with the people include your parents, spouse, friends, those working for you, working with
you, etc – but why do we treat others differently? Because of desires, there are priorities even when
showing manners. Manners are a result of your faith, not because of wanting something from
others.
 Al Bukhari began with manners with your parents first, why? Because they deserve the best
manners than anyone else. If you have bad manners with your parents, then it can be a major sin.
But with other people it’s less. Good behavior with your parents is a great reward.
 Your success and happiness in life is according to how much you are behaving well with others. And
when you have good manners with your parents, then Allah (swt) will help you to have good
manners with others. So the foundation to your manners is with your parents and from there it’s
built up.
 Reference: Commentary on Al Adab Al Mufrad is based on the lectures of Sheikh Abdulrazaq Al
Bader.

Virtues of good manners

 Hadith: ( ‫ وأقربكم مني مجلسًا‬،‫ "إن من أحبكم إلي‬:‫وعن جابر بن عبد هللا رضي هللا عنهما أن رسول هللا صلى هللا عليه وسلم قال‬
،‫ أحاسنكم أخال ًقا‬،‫( )يوم القيامة‬Jabir bin 'Abdullah (May Allah be pleased with them) said: The Messenger of
Allah (‫ )ﷺ‬said, "The dearest and the closest of you to me on the Day of Resurrection will be those
who are the best in behaviour) – At Tirmidhi Book 18, Hadith 1738
 Hadith: The Prophet (‫ )ﷺ‬said: (‫( )بعثت ألتم مكارم األخالق‬I was sent to perfect good character) – Malik,
Book 47, Hadith 1643
 ِ ‫هللاِ صلى هللا عليه وسلم عَن أَك َث ِر مَا يُد‬
ِ َ ‫خ ُل ال َناسَ الجَ َن َة َف َقا َل " َتق َوى‬
Hadith: (" ‫هللا َوحُسنُ ال ُخل ُ ِق‬ َ ‫ َقا َل ُسئِ َل رَ سُو ُل‬،َ‫)عَن أَبِي ُهرَ يرَ ة‬
(Abu Hurairah narrated that the Messenger of Allah was asked about that for which people are
admitted into Paradise the most, so he said: "Taqwa of Allah, and good character.") - Jami` at-
Tirmidhi 2004

Remarks while studying this book

Page 1
 ‫بسم هللا الرحمن الرحيم‬
Al Adab Al Mufrad (‫)األدب المفرد‬
04 October 2015 – 20 Dhul Hijjah 1436

 Correct intention: we are studying this book for the pleasure of Allah (swt). When the intention is
correct, then Allah (swt) will bless your study and your sitting. Then you will find the fruits of what
you’re learning which are good manners. May Allah (swt) not make us of the deprived ones who
study and memorize but don’t apply.
 Dua’a and istia’na in Allah (swt): ask Allah (swt) to help you, anything we do or have done is all from
Allah (swt). Someone might say I didn’t make dua’a but Allah (swt) helped me. That’s because Allah
(swt) is Al Haleem and dealt with you with His forbearance. With Allah (swt), you can do everything,
but without Allah (swt), you can’t do anything. Hadith: ( ‫هللاِ صلى هللا عليه وسلم أَ َخ َذ‬ َ ‫ أَنَ رَ سُو َل‬،‫عَن ُمعَا ِذ ب ِن جَ ب ٍَل‬
‫صالَ ٍة َتقُو ُل اللَ ُه َم أَ ِع ِّني َعلَى‬ َ ‫َاذ لَ َت َدعَنَ فِي ُدب ُِر ُك ِّل‬ َ ‫ َف َقا َل " أُوصِ ي‬. " ‫ك‬
ُ ‫ك يَا ُمع‬ ِ ُ ‫هللاِ إِ ِّني أل‬
َ ‫ح ُّب‬ َ ‫ك َو‬ ِ ُ ‫هللا إِ ِّني أل‬
َ ‫ح ُّب‬ ُ ‫ِب َي ِد ِه َو َقا َل " يَا ُمع‬
ِ َ ‫َاذ َو‬
"‫ك‬ َ ِ‫ك وَ حُس ِن ِعبَا َدت‬ َ ‫شك ِر‬ ُ ‫ك َو‬َ ‫( )ذِك ِر‬Mu'adh b. Jabal reported that the Messenger of Allah (‫ )ﷺ‬caught his
hand and said: By Allah, I love you, Mu'adh. I give some instruction to you. Never leave to recite this
supplication after every (prescribed) prayer: "O Allah, help me in remembering You, in giving You
thanks, and worshipping You well.") - Sunan Abi Dawud 1522
 Dua’a: ( َ ‫َال َو َس ِّيئَ األَخالَ ِق لَ َيقِي َس ِّي َئهَا إِل‬ ِ ‫َن األَخالَ ِق لَ يَهدِي ألَح َسنِهَا إِلَ أَنتَ َوقِنِي َس ِّيئَ األَعم‬ ِ ‫َال وَ أَحس‬ ِ ‫َن األَعم‬ َ
ِ ‫اه ِدنِي ألحس‬
َ‫( )أَنت‬Allahummahdini liahsanil-amali wa ahsanil-akhlaqi la yahdi li ahsaniha illa anta wa qini sayy'al-
a'mali wa sayy'al-ahaqi la yaqi sayy'aha illa ant) (O Allah, guide me to the best of deeds and the best
of manners, for none can guide to the best of them but You. And protect me from bad deeds and
bad manners, for none can protect against them but You) - Sunan an-Nasa'i 896
 Dua’a: ( } ‫ َفحَ سِّن ُخلُقِي‬,‫{ اَللَ ُه َم َكمَا أَحسَنتَ َخلقِي‬- ‫ صلى هللا عليه وسلم‬- ‫هللا‬ ِ َ َ ‫ َقا َل رَ سُو ُل‬:‫ َقا َل‬- ‫ رضى هللا عنه‬- ‫َن اِب ِن مَسعُو ٍد‬ ِ ‫َوع‬
‫حبَان‬ِ ُ‫صحَحَ ُه اِبن‬ َ
َ ‫( )رَ َواهُ أح َم ُد َو‬Ibn Mas’ud (RAA) narrated that the Messenger of Allah (‫ )ﷺ‬Said, “O
Allah You have made my creation perfect, so make my moral characteristics also be the best.”)
 Hadith: (،‫ َكمَا َق َس َم بَي َن ُكم أَر َزا َق ُكم‬،‫هللاَ َتعَالَى َق َس َم بَي َن ُكم أَخالَ َق ُكم‬
َ َ‫ إِن‬:‫'( )عَن عَب ِد هللاِ َقا َل‬Abdullah said, "Allah Almighty
shared out your character between you as He divided your provision between you) – Al Adab Al
Mufrad Book 1, Hadith 275
o This shows you need to ask Allah (swt) and He will give you.

(1) Chapter on (‫( )و وصينا االنسان بوالديه حسنا‬And We have enjoined on man to be good
and dutiful to his parents,) – Surah Al Ankaboot 8

Hadith: ( ‫ ث َّم‬:‫ ق ْلت‬،‫الصالة على و ْقتِها‬ َّ :‫ أي ا ْلعم ِل أحب إِلى هللاِ ع َّز وجل َّ؟ قال‬:‫سأ ْلت ال َّن ِب َّي صلى هللا عليه وسلم‬
‫استزدْ ته لزادنِي‬ ِ ‫ ث َّم ا ْل ِجهاد فِي س ِب‬:‫ ث َّم أي؟ قال‬:‫ ق ْلت‬،‫ ث َّم ِبر ا ْلوالِد ْي ِن‬:‫( )أي؟ قال‬Abu
ْ ‫ ول ِو‬، َّ‫ حدَّثنِي ِب ِهن‬:‫يل هللاِ قال‬
'Amr ash-Shaybani said, "The owner of this house (and he pointed at the house of
'Abdullah ibn Mas'ud) said, "I asked the Prophet, may Allah bless him and grant him
peace, which action Allah loves best. He replied, 'Prayer at its proper time.' 'Then
what?' I asked. He said, 'Then kindness to parents." I asked, 'Then what?' He replied,
'Then jihad in the Way of Allah.'" He added, "He told me about these things. If I had
asked him to tell me more, he would have told me more.")

We have to behave the best with our parents and we can easily take them for granted. They will not ask
for something but when you visit them they appreciate it so much. Paradise is so near to us but we’re
going far away, subhan Allah.

Page 2
 ‫بسم هللا الرحمن الرحيم‬
Al Adab Al Mufrad (‫)األدب المفرد‬
04 October 2015 – 20 Dhul Hijjah 1436

 Sa’ad ibn Waqas (ra) became Muslim and his mother was not and she threatened to not eat or drink
until he left Islam. She didn’t eat or drink for three days, and he told her if you had a 100 souls and
each is leaving, I wouldn’t leave the deen. You need to be good with your parents but if they put you
in difficult situatuion to disobey Allah (swt) and commit shirk, then don’t obey them. Surah Al
Ankaboot 8: (ۚ‫ك بِهِۦ ع ِۡل ً۬م َف َال ُتطِ ۡع ُهمَا‬ َ ‫( ) َووَ ص َۡي َنا ۡٱۡلِن َس ٰـنَ بِ َوٲلِد َۡي ِه ح ُۡس ً۬ ًناۖ َوإِن جَ ٰـ َهدَا‬And We have
َ ‫ك لِ ُت ۡش ِر‬
َ َ‫ك بِى مَا لَ ۡيسَ ل‬
enjoined on man to be good and dutiful to his parents, but if they strive to make you join with Me
(in worship) anything (as a partner) of which you have no knowledge, then obey them not) Allah
(swt) didn’t say be mean or shout at them, just don’t obey them in this matter. This is for someone
whose parents are disbelievers, so what about parents that are believers? Subhan Allah. Take it as a
rule in life, there is no one perfect. No perfect spouse, children, maids, etc. Imperfect + imperfect =
perfect. You and your spouse are imperfect, but together you’re perfect.
 As a woman, not only are you responsible for your parents, but also your husband’s parents to
remind him to be dutiful to his parents.
 This hadith shows us a question being posed to the Prophet (‫ )ﷺ‬from the Companions and their
eagerness is to know what are the best deeds beloved by Allah (swt), why? Because they want the
love of Allah (swt). They didn’t ask what deeds take you to paradise, but the most beloved by Allah
(swt). Sometimes when you’re on the way of guidance, there are many deeds, but you want the
best.
 The most beloved deed is to pray on time (‫الصالة على و ْقتِها‬
َّ ). To be cont’d in sha’a Allah.
May Allah (swt) love us and make us dutiful to our parents. Ameen.

Page 3