Tragedy, and an OCD diagnosis, reshaped my understanding of what I was doing – and why, says Elle Warren, a writer covering queerness and mental health

As a fire brigade commander, I worked on the Grenfell Tower disaster. When I developed PTSD, I realised I couldn’t just ‘push through’, says writer and former firefighter JD Murphy

Coming to terms with my son and his partner’s modern, tender and considered parenting hasn’t been easy – but now I love it, says Rose Rouse of Advantages of Age

Why was I so fixated on being right all of the time? Calmly, after a board game outburst, a seven-year-old set me straight, says author Sergey Maidukov

Last autumn, I pared back the clutter to face the white walls of my flat. It was the start of a more guilt-free approach to healing, says author Kat Lister

The modern world just isn’t set up for non-smartphone users, but after a few faltering steps away from mine, my life changed, says Will Clempner

My friends expected nothing less, but my habitual tardiness was more than just a quirk: it was eating away at my wellbeing, says writer Helene Rosenthal

A career in politics was my dream, but the pressures were too great. Quitting was best for me and for those I was there to serve, says author Kimberly McIntosh

Almost four decades after Stephen overdosed, I was finally able to grieve the astonishing waste of my brother’s young life, says journalist Lynne Wallis

It was a thrill to read what people were saying about me. Then I found out that I wasn’t alone. The habit just had to go, says novelist Adaobi Tricia Nwaubani

For decades I wrangled my frizz in an attempt to fit in. But amid rising antisemitism, I decided to embrace my identity, says author Diana Spechler

The expectation that parents can neatly compartmentalise their professional and domestic lives is an unfair one, says freelance writer Emma Armstrong

My childhood bullies instilled in me a hatred of my body. Now I hear the word ‘fat’ as a neutral term rather than a label of shame, says author Jason Prokowiew

Last year, I finally realised that my habit of seeing everything through to the end was just a colossal waste of time, says Callum Bains

Interning for an A-lister’s production company, I thought I had made it – but three years later I was back in cold, wet London, says app creator Kate Wilson

After retiring, I finally had time to practise. But I soon realised that playing and making music are two different things, says Brian Hanson-Harding

I used to remove myself from experiences in favour of chasing matches. Now I’m fulfilled by the company of real people, says freelance writer Anya Ryan

I had always called myself ‘a collector’. Then I saw that holding on to things had become my way of coping with hard times, says journalist Claire Jackson