synopsis - blade never wanted to hurt you, but with his mara accidents could always happen
includes - blade
warnings - gn!teen!reader, angst, slight comfort, small mentions of injuries, wc - 704
it was always a warning issued to you, one that always remained at the back of your head due to the potential huge amount of danger you could be in.
you knew it was to protect you and blade.
ever since you'd associated with the stellaron hunters, specifically blade, you'd been made very aware of every little to major danger you could ever be posed with. one of which included the potential of blade's mara flaring up - something that unfortunately always be a risk so learning how to deal with it would be the only response.
although it was certainly easier said than done seeing as blade couldn't exactly take control of when the mara would flare up or even how badly it affected him. the best precautions that could be taken were to either vacate the area for your own safety and get kafka to step in.
her spirit whispers weren't a permanent solution but the best option by far.
however, it was quite widely acknowledged that one day, since you and blade were quite close, that you would have the misfortune of watching him succumb to the mara. it was something that blade didn't want to put you through but he was very aware it was bound to happen - and pushing you away to try and avoid it was objectively a harsher fate.
blade would've never thought of bringing harm to you. especially after getting so close to you, hurting someone like you would bring blade more pain to himself, something he probably couldn't ever forgive himself for if he did.
but it was always bound to happen at some point. blade's mara had been flaring up for enough time for him to be able to recognise at least some of those signs, so the best he could do was to warn you if you were near.
the warnings were never fully possible, whether that was due to an overall lack of or simply it falling on deaf ears, it didn't matter as the failure would lead to you being around blade as the mara took control.
his mind was easily clouded and every sense of rational he had faded into a faint nothingness. you were worried for him, reluctant to leave his side as you didn't quite know what to do even if you did. - but perhaps running as far as you can with no plan would have still been the option you should've taken.
before either of you knew it, blade had drawn his blade against you. vicious intentions were held behind his actions, directed at nobody in particular with no real control for what happens next on blade's behalf.
all you could feel was a searing pain, from both the gashes being left on your body from being slashed by blade and from the pain of blade actually hurting you - even if you knew he had no control.
everything became a blur and you could only guess that you were lucky enough to have someone else to stumble across the scene and save you. the painful memories forever seared into your memory.
he was never fully conscious when the mara had control, therefore, he would only be aware of what he'd done when it subsided for the time being. and "waking up” from his mara stricken state to learn that he had in fact attacked you, it distressed him to a degree he wouldn't admit outloud.
it wasn't too surprising that balde then avoided you for a while. he couldn't bring himself to face you after learning what he'd done to you, and the fear of it happening again, at to a potential worse degree, was enough to discourage him from seeking out your company or even checking up on you.
it would take you to approach him for you and him to ever talk again. the guilt on his behalf was quite immense and so even then he was still wary - you could tell that it would take a while for it to ease.
from then on, blade would be more than cautious whenever you were around as he wouldn't ever be able to forgive himself if it happened again.