Join Me In Marvel Hell

"average cat owner spends 3 years in prison" factoid actualy just statistical error. average owner spends 0 years in prison. Miette's mother, who kicked her body like the football and went to jail for One Thousand Years is an outlier adn should not have been counted

I love how every single Georg post observes the original's typo

i like that you said "observe" instead of "preserve," implying this has religious importance.

andrei tarkovsky on the set of “the sacrifice”, 1986

Andrei Tarkovsky - Solaris (1972)

HE BROKE THE RECORD

Senator Cory Booker just broke the all-time record for the longest Senate floor speech, speaking for over 24 hours without a pause (no food, no bathroom breaks, only water to drink) as a protest against Trump and Musk and what they're doing.

The previous record was set in 1957, when Strom Thurmond spoke for 24 hours and 18 minutes protesting the Civil Rights Act.

Senator Booker has blown past that record, currently at 25 hours and still speaking as of 8 pm local time. Respect.

on ao3 like some of these doves aren't even wounded

#people used to be freaks #we used to be a country (@spikeface)

Okay but “dead dove do not eat” means “what you read on the bag is what is inside the bag”. The punchline to the reference is opening the bag that says “dead dove” and finding a dead dove, á là surprised pikachu. A fic tagged “Fuffy fuzzy bunny cuddles, dead dove do not eat” SHOULD NOT INDICATE DARK CONTENT. ONLY THAT THE FIC HAS BEEN TAGGED ACCURATE TO THE CONTENT.

We used to say “don’t like, don’t read”. Dead Dove is just an extension of that.

The author gave you a list of ingredients. The ingredients was “dead dove”. You cannot act shocked that there was dead dove. It was in the ingredients that the author told you

dead dove BY ITSELF doesn’t mean Jack all and I will DIE ON THE HILL OF RIGHTEOUS FURY

via @swatercolor [insta]

This is the best tag I've ever received on a post, I think

we need more divorcebaiting. how strongly can canon imply (without technically outright stating) that these two characters are bitterly, acrimoniously divorced? essential we explore this

i'll acknowledge it

libsoftiktok going after a beloved inventor furry for some reason

if you're wearing a fitbit, you're using spottacus's technology. be grateful.

oh boy

This guy seems extremely fucking based

so it takes "inventing the technology behind FitBit" money to own that many fursuits.

This takes my “make yourself indispensable and you can wear anything you want to work” to a whole new level.

So many modern detectives have tried to emulate Sherlock Holmes, and none of them have even come CLOSE to touching Benoit Blanc. That man is Holmes' true spiritual successor. He's a silly little guy. He's gay. He's a drama queen. He has impeccable fashion sense. He loves music. He works with the cops but refuses to work for them. His voice is both goofy and incredibly fun to listen to. He sucks at playing Clue and Among Us. He mopes in the bathtub for weeks when he doesn't have a case. He loves hanging out with The Girls but gets incredibly uncomfortable when women flirt with him. The only reason he can afford his gorgeous downtown apartment is because his husband works a real job.* The only thing he hates more than Rich Assholes are Stupid Rich Assholes. He solved a double (attempted triple) homicide and the thing that made him most upset was plagiarism. He supports women's rights and women's wrongs. He refuses to break the law himself but actively encourages his client to commit arson.

And, most importantly, he and Holmes would fucking love each other. If most of the modern day detectives inspired by Holmes ever met him, he would probably want to kill them with hammers, but he and Blanc would probably end up being penpals and sending each other newspaper clippings about crime or some shit. And I can absolutely envision a teenage Blanc reading the Holmes stories and being like, "Wait, being a silly little gay private detective is a viable career option? Well, I guess I've finally found my calling in life."

Anyway I love the Benoit Blanc movies and I hope they make a million of them

*confirmed by Rian Johnson

jurassic park but it's tiny elephants and nothing goes wrong 🥺

same score but played entirely on kazoos

Every time someone escapes tradwifery & becomes a joyful transgender, the world gets slightly more beautiful

no one's doing somnophillia anymore

because of woke

Given that patent attorneys, especially back then used to have hard science degree, it makes the one about how they know the weight limit on a bridge funnier.

For the uninitiated:

My preferred version:

Dad 100% studied physics or engineering, he's just also a troll, which is why he's a patent lawyer.

for april fools we’re deleting this entire site sayonara you weeaboo shits