“you can’t be here.”

“     and you have no say in my life , but here we are .     ”

closed    for    :    @begsfor   .

“     i     never     asked     you     to     it     .     i     know     i     made     a     mistake     ,     but     that     doesn't     give     you     the     right     to     throw     it     in     my     face     every     time     we     have     an     argument     .     you     said     you'd     try     to     forgive     me     ,     but     we     both     know     you're     not     .     ”

‘ you don't get to tell me you feel bad. ’

“    and     you     can't     dictate     my     feelings     .     ”     he     snaps     back     ,     frustrated     sigh     leaving     brims     .     “    you     know     i     would     never     do     anything     to     hurt     you     ,     i'm     truly     sorry     .     ”

‘ i never meant to hurt you. ’

“    the     road     to     hell     is     paved     with     good     intentions     ,     right     ?     ”     humorless     laugh     falls     laced     by     the     smoke     of     her     menthol     cigarette     .     “    it     doesn't     matter     what     you     meant     ,     it     matters     what     you     did     .     ”

Alice Pagani

huffs   out   a   breath   through   nostrils   that's   the   closest   thing   to   a   laugh   ,   jaw   flexing   around   it   with   biting   tension   .   "   great   ,   then   you   have   something   to   take   away   from   this   . you're   welcome   .   "   timbre   is   wrapped   in   sarcasm   ,   anger   licking   up   his   spine   as   fingers   flex   in   his   lap   .   trying   to   keep   from   throwing   her   ass   out   himself   .   "   i'm   not   an   animal   ,   faye   .   of   course   i   put   it   in   a   fucking   box   .   "   –   "   but   you   have   to   wait   to   leave   .   can't   risk   anyone   seeing   you   .   "

eyes     roll     ,     but     expression     remains     unbothered     .     when     it     came     to     zero     ,     femme     had     no     more     tears     to     cry     ,     there     was     no     time     to     waste     .     she     had     to     move     on     no     matter     how     much     she     still     cared     for     him     .     “    oh     ,     thank     you     very     much     .     i     hope     i     have     grown     a     better     judgment     after     you     .     ”     a     sigh     of     relief     at     not     having     to     be     in     the     same     space     as     her     ex     was     interrupted     by     his     remark     .     crossing     arms     in     front     of     her     chest     and     narrowing     eyes     to     look     at     homme     .     “    so     you're     holding     me     captive     ?     you     know     ,     for     someone     who     never     wanted     to     see     me     again     ,     you     actually     like     to     find     reasons     to     stay     close     to     me     .     ”

exclusive   ,   he   says   .   "   yeah   ,   thank   fuck   for   that   .   "   bites   out   ,   lids   narrowed   into   fine   slits   .   malice   marinates   beneath   thick   skin   ..   ready   to   pounce   for   his   juggular   any   second   .   "   i'm   not   throwing   a   fucking tantrum   .   do   you   see   your   shit   on   fire   ,   your   tires   slashed   ?   didn't   think   so   .   just   thinks   it's   pathetic   that   you   don't   know   how   to   keep   it   in   your   pants   for   one   night   .   "

homme     knew     he     was     playing     with     fire     ,     always     close     to     getting     burned     when     it     came     to     natalya     ,     but     that     was     what     kept     him     interested     .     “    set     my     shit     on     fire     and     slash     my     tires     is     something     a     girlfriend     would     do     ,     which     we     have     already     made     clear     is     not     your     case     ,     ”     countered     ,     sending     a     wink     her     way     ,     sly     smile     playing     on     the     corner     of     his     lips     .     “    so     that's     your     issue     ?     that     wasn't     you     warming     my     bed     last     night     ?     it's     not     my     fault     you     didn't     make     time     for     me     ,     i     just     found     someone     who     did     .     ”

self-sabotage  was  his  specialty  ,  a  well  practiced  routine  used  to  drive  away  every  single  person  in  his  life  .  but  when  his  antics  don't  do  their  job  with  the  femme  in  front  of  him  ,  he  panics  —  gaze  flickering  down  to  where  her  digits  overlap  his  .  "  you  shouldn't  .  "  shakes  his  head  ,  although  he  can't  bring  himself  to  yank  his  hand  away  from  his  the  way  the  voice  in  the  back  of  his  head  is  demanding  him  to  .  instead  he'll  drag  his  gaze  back  up  to  hers  ,  ironically  attempting  to  reason  with  her  in  his  drunken  state  .  "  what  do  you  gain  from  this  ?  us  ?  be  honest  with  yourself  .  "

femme     laughs     at     his     question     ,     thumb     brushing     against     his     skin,     eyes     kept     locked     on     his     .     “    what     do     i     gain     ?     i'm     not     worried     about     that     .     what     do     you     gain     from     this     ?     we're     just     looking     for     a     distraction     ,     right     ?     ”     raises     eyebrows     to     ask     .     in     a     way     ,     freya     could     see     herself     in     matteo     ,     just     two     empty     people     looking     for     something     ,     for     anything     to     make     them     feel     alive     even     for     a     moment     .     “    if     you     don't     want     this     ,     i     understand     .     i     just     think     it     might     be     nice     to     have     someone     around     to     distract     you     from     how     fucked     up     real     life     can     be     sometimes     .     ”

     visibly softens the moment a tear slips from her eyes . hates to see her cry . never his cup of tea . he was an asshole , but his soft spot was one - hundred percent for her . cups her face , tattooed thumbs wiping her tears . “ i'm positive , moira . i am . if you don't want me to talk to her , i won't . i mean it when i say that sometimes it's really as simple as telling me . sometimes i need you to tell me , 'cause basic clues don't register . ––- i really care about you . i do . i'm sorry i don't show it . ”

hating     feeling     vulnerable     in     front     of     others     ,     especially     after     an     argument     ,     tears     made     her     feel     weak     ,     pushing     them     away     from     her     face     .     but     his     fingers     touch     her     face     ,     and     moira     feels     at     peace     again     ,     closing     her     eyes     as     feels     his     digits     wiping     away     tears     that     insist     on     falling     down     her     cheek     .     “     i     don't     want     to     have     to     tell     you     ,     i     don't     like     being     the     jealous     and     insecure     girlfriend     .     that's     not     me     ,      ”     sighs     ,     frustrated     .     arms     wrapping     around     his     waist     and     leaning     her     head     against     his     chest     .

     she wasn't going to ignore what he just said to her . even if he tried to brush it off , she wasn't going to ignore it . didn't want to . especially because she didn't expect for him to say that he loved her . that was changing everything . her mind was fucking spinning . reeling . “ it does matter ! a simple yes or no would suffice . you don't have anything to be afraid of at this point .. ––– please . ”

large     steps     leave     him     just     a     few     inches     away     from     the     femme     ,     eyes     locked     on     hers     .     “     i'm     not     scared     ,     whatever     you     heard     doesn't     mean     anything     .     not     when     you're     ready     to     walk     away     so     easily     .     so     if     you     want     to     go     ,     fucking     go     .      ”     homme     wanted     her     to     go     ,     needed     her     to     go     because     it     was     never     real     for     rhys     as     it     is     with     lenny     .     so     she     needed     to     go     ,     own     feelings     made     him     scared     of     he     might     do     if     she     don't     .

brows furrowed for a moment as he looked at her before a soft sigh passed his lips . “ i’m sorry it took me so long to realize but , come on talia tell me it’s not too late . ”

“     ii'm     sorry     ,     but     you     missed     your     shot     ,     ”     tries     to     ignore     how     shaken     her     voice     sounds     ,     forcing     tears     to     stay     in     .     “     i     can't     do     this     ,     i     can't     keep     hurting     because     of     you     ,     and     when     i'm     finally     ready     to     move     on     you     show     up     again     .     ”

❝ you don't need me to tell you that . ❞ besides , it's fairly obvious in the way the brunette has him stumbling over his words . ❝ i mean , there's gotta be a reason they think we look good together . they've been gushing about it for the past five minutes . ❞

“     i     don't     ,     but     it     doesn't     mean     i     wouldn't     appreciate     it     ,     ”     says     ,     throwing     her     dark     locks     back     .     turning     to     face     homme     ,     arms     wrap     around     his     neck     as     femme     gets     closer     so     that     her     lips     is     just     a     few     inches     away     from     his     .     “     try     not     to     fall     in     love     ,     ”     teases     ,     before     looking     at     the     camera     again     .