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sex, mayhem, whatever.

@crookedvultures / crookedvultures.tumblr.com

20s โ€ข a landfill for my hyperfixations

me staring at my calculator app for 45 seconds before i remember i was trying to open my clock app to set an alarm

My manager was in the break room with me and she said 'I don't ever remember oranges being THIS hard to peel' and I just responded 'they're making them harder to peel' without thinking and she looked and me and said. Why?

Because of woke.

reading the worst one liner review of a film on letterboxd and then going to their profile and seeing lady bird in their top 4 yeah just as I thought

I love movies where the plot takes place in less than a day. Itโ€™s like. What if these people were experiencing the worst 8 hours of the entire lives and you got to see the highlight reel?

the way jimmy is actually a very good caretaker and genuinely takes that responsibility seriously is so important to me. like yes you have indirectly caused a ton of heinous pain and suffering. yes you cant stop lying even if your life depends on it. yes you deny yourself access to your guilt in order to preserve your own comfort and ease of existence. buuuut you also know exactly what kinds of fruit your brother wants from the store on any given day. you also go all the way into the city at the crack of dawn just for the specific newspaper your brother likes to read over morning tea. you take care to feed your fish just the right amount of food for optimum nutrition. you hesitantly ask a hostile cartel boss not to tap on the glass of the tank bc it isn't good for the fish. idk there's something heartbreaking about that! about the fact that when a life is placed in jimmy's hands, he does his best to care for it. despite everything, he does his best to care for it.

Anonymous asked:

seeing strange fetishes im not into on my dash is like observing an edible herb on a walk. Hmm. someone wise โ˜ could make use of this... but i shan't ๐Ÿ‘ด

you paint such a beautiful picture with your words anon thank you

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