Yikes

The more you repress your emotions, the stronger your elemental eruption attack is going to be. Bottle it up!

your honor my client is guilty can i get another one

i am not a hint taker. u need to speak up.

Trying To Not Feel Doomed Tuesday

my baby

Kidd Gorgeous -Nightfish 

[image description: a gif parodying edward hopper’s nighthawks. it depicts the diner filled with water and various fish swimming around inside it. the light from the diner casts reflections through the water onto the street outside. /end description]

good thing he didn’t add a door

the girls are fighting at the backstage

“Rayban charity glasses event” is a scam don’t click any link in a post that says that.

Old tumblr users remember this scam back when it first went out.

Also no, this isn’t a joke. This phishing scam is 100% running its course again so watch out for your mutuals long abandoned accounts suddenly posting it. Please make everyone aware of it since most users here are newbies who have not seen it before!

I ENDED UP DRAWING A COMIC ABOUT THIS STUPID FUCKING ASK IM CRYING

an extremely short story about two knights who were made for each other

I guess it wasn’t just a one knight stand, then…

Source

ok this is a poignant visual metaphor tho

this image made me quit my job.

I remember the first time I saw it, i stared at it for several minutes until I finally just started crying. It made me resolve to leave, and I turned in my resignation about a month later.

This is your reminder that if life keeps throwing you lemons you are not morally obligated to make lemonade from them. You can duck, or catch them in a trash can, or get a baseball bat and slam those fuckers into the stratosphere.

Guys I found the only good thing on Facebook.

Update:

Oh fuck they’re inclusive ants, too?!?

Hello, my loves. If you haven’t eaten yet today, or if you’ve had a difficult time with food for a while, this is a little reminder that you’re valuable, loved, and worthy of enjoying nice things, like delicious food and rest. It can be difficult to exist, but you’re persevering despite these hardships. If you have been waiting for a sign to be kinder or more patient towards yourself, maybe this one can encourage you to begin. I’m proud of you, and I adore you all more than words can express.

Thats a potion whose effect is “teleport straight to hospital”

when I was a kid I went camping and the adults at the big campsite went around and gave all the kids glowsticks and necklaces to wear at night (kids loved it, and adults knew where the kids were because none of them wanted to lose their prettyshiny)

Mine went straight in my mouth because it had a delightful plasticy feeling with a slight crunch if you really went for it. I chewed on that thing for ages. Until at some point I accidentally actually bit into it and it popper and I got glowstick all up in my mouth and down my shirt and it was horrible. One of (but not the worst) things I have ever had the misfortune of tasting. And I knew it had to be poison because it was probably radioactive goo or something and I was gonna die and my parents and everyone would know I died because I ate a glowstick and did something stupid

So I spat it out and washed my mouth really good with water and then wandered into the woods crying to die alone after everyone was asleep because I was clearly going to die from the poison and at least this way they might think I died getting eaten by animals or taken by ghosts or maybe they'd be happy because they never found my tiny child corpse and would assume I'd gone on to live a cool life amongst the trees.

Except at some point my parents woke up and everyone freaked out about a missing child in the woods and me being smart stuck to the trails so I was easy to find with my stupid glowing shirt and my glowing face and my bucket hat 2 or 3 miles down the path.

I told my parents I was worried people might think I was a stupid kid who died doing something stupid by eating a glow stick so instead I decided to run away into the woods forever or die and then nobody would think I was stupid. My folks listened carefully and then told me that was stupid.