rems

Today's sobering "0" had arrived during lunch.

oughh twinyard angst o<—<

no clue why andrew minyard looks like he’s fresh out the womb

I present to you: the trc cast as random tumblr posts!

Came back from a few exhausting weeks so I'm treating myself with trc doodles.

This is in the continuity of this post where i said i could make hundreds of those - and honestly i'm not kidding ; it's very therapeutic to make somehow.

the funniest part about the semi-recent 'discourse' about aaron's twins and what nora apparently said about andrew not liking them (?) was that canonically aaron and kate don't HAVE kids. like they don't want any. they do medical school and then move to chicago and get big ass aquarium and a tiny pug they name popo and like that's it. that's their lives. they actively choose to not have kids (as is their right). so like what was anybody even mad about

As promised a Neil and Andrew animation. my original plan was an exy game but I spent so long sculpting Neil’s scars that I needed an excuse to show them off.

Pro tip, if you ever find yourself learning to animate characters wait until you know what you’re doing before attempting to animate two interacting, in saying that I have so many ideas on what to do next and I will not be following my own advice.

day 1845 drawing neil josten & co instead of sleeping

i think we need to get weirder about demiromantic neil. make his relationship with andrew even weirder. fuck with the idea of what a romantic relationship is and can be and looks like. make it weird and hard or even impossible to understand and something that no one else could replicate because it's built around who they are.

I didn't notice Neil Josten's supposedly sexless narrative because he thinks too much like me and we were both fascinated by Andrew's every move. The most attractive thing a person can do is match your freak, and Neil (Identity Fraud) Josten found the one man who scratches that itch. Physical sex has NOTHING on the intricate mind games these two were playing the whole time.

rereading trk and knowing the things happening behind the scenes in the nest gives everything so much more WEIGHT holy shit wdym grayson was neil's backliner mark in the ravens v foxes match wdym jean was playing defence alongside him wdym in less than a year neil would orchestrate grayson's death wdym jean's "ashen ice" smile as he stared kevin down at the banquet wdym kevin's quiet "jean." when they see each other for the first time in almost a year wdym jean got between riko and neil when they had their fistfight at the christmas banquet wdym drake's attack was direct retribution to andrew "claiming" kevin in front of riko wdym jean spent neil's two weeks in evermore whispering to him in french when riko wasn't looking like he did with kevin for years god i feel like that one clip of jennifer lawrence on hot ones rn.

happy birthday neil homojosten pretty sure you’re the same age as my mother now

At Eden's

Neil choosing Andrew means everything to me. No one ever chose Andrew for who he is. His own mother gave him away and kept his brother. His whole life, Andrew had to bargain with promises and violence just to keep people close.

And then there’s Neil Josten with his stupid big Bambi eyes and a heartbeat like a rabbit in a trap. And he isn’t interested in anyone but Andrew. Just Andrew.

It’s like the universe is trying to apologize, awkwardly patting Andrew on the back and tying a bow around Neil’s head like some kind of peace offering.

I’m screaming. I’m in agony. I have so many feelings about them I'm about to throw up.