one day I'll be the home of queer fantasy novels

-_- apparently the cut-off for this thing I want to submit to (which closes tomorrow) is 70k words, and I’ve got 67k

I need to think of three thousand words of bullshit to pad this thing. like a chapter where everyone goes for coffee, or something. 

okay there are 42 chapters in the book, and dividing 3000 by 42 = ~72

so I’d have to write the chapter titles like this:

Chapter 2: In Which an Elf Is Concussed, but it’s Not Really My Fault Because What Would You Have Done? Would You Not Have Concussed the Elf? No, Of Course You Would Have. We All Would Have Concussed the Elf. Besides Which, I Am Very Sorry for Concussing Her and Will Try to Make Amends Later If She Stops Trying to Kill Me. Also, Her Intent to Kill Me Was a Highly Relevant Factor In My Decision to Concuss Her

and who will stop me? God?

TWO YEARS LATER! Titan Books is publishing this, and every chapter title takes up a third of the page. god didn’t stop me after all

(you can pre-order here: Barnes & Noble, Books A Million, Amazon.com, Amazon.ca, Amazon.co.uk, Indigo, Waterstones, Forbidden Planet, Bookshop.org)

it’s so funny to see this all fancy and formalized

I love when a character wants to be someone's dog so so bad. Dont mean it in a sexual way (although that can also be a part of it) I mean like. Let me be your loyal companion let me stay by your side give me a purpose in exchange for endless unconditional love let me stop being a person love me like it's my only use. Love me like that's the only thing I was made for. As you can tell. I'm normal.

What they don't tell you about writing is that as you write, you discover scenes and entire plots that you hadn't accounted for that need to be written. So you can spend two hours writing and editing only to realise you're further away from the finish line than you thought you were when you started

I need to be more insane about my ocs

it is honestly amazing how much of writing and editing is just. logistics. like... do i use a name here or a pronoun? if i move this dialogue tag to the middle of this line and break it in half, does the end of the line hit harder that way? what if i move the tag to the front? what if i remove it entirely? ...wait, whose point of view am i in; can i reasonably say this character is appalled, or must i say they look or seem or sound appalled? is this a deliberate action or a step-removed one; is her hand closing on his shoulder, or is she closing her hand on his shoulder? environment environment environment, we need to break all this dialogue up with some narration, the scene is coming untethered. what! are! they doing! with! the rest of their bodies that are not hands! fuck fuck fuck FUCK i forgot we covered this two chapters ago and now i either need to cut this whole chunk or find a reason to reprise the conversation from earlier. name or pronoun? name or pronoun? name or pronoun? move this clause around in this sentence? oh i'll add this phrase-- nope, never mind, past!me added the same phrase two lines down. okay, if i add too much environmental narration it's going to take away from this bit, but not enough and it won't feel grounded. what if i move this to its own line? where the FUCK are their hands?

Happy pride month specifically to folks on the asexual and aromantic spectrum who oftentimes feel isolated and left out of the conversation. You belong here as much as the rest of us and I hope that you are all loved in a way that is comforting to you.

unreliable narrator but it's just an aromantic writing romance

the author's barely concealed aromanticism

absolutely love abusing the power that comes with 3rd person limited pov and just ignoring things and being vague sometimes. does the character know all the details? no? then I don't have to either.

i hear a good lyric and start mentally holding up blorbos like im in the home depot paint aisle comparing swatches

I know unicorns in modern media are kind of regulated to cutsie, MLP, rainbow plastic toys, or shitting rainbows, 'lets go to candy mountain' but man. I WISH more fantasy media would put them in unironically. There is so much symbolic and narrative potential in a creature that is, depending on your mythology:

Actually, this remind me of a thought I had during my biology of mammals lab today:

So, if you've never seen one up close (or a detailed picture of one), narwhal tusks look exactly like your typical unicorn horn, complete with the spiraling grooves. But they can grow to be well over 8 feet in length.

Now imagine, a massive unicorn, the size of an elephant or larger, with a horn of that size, sharpened to a deadly point. Imagine them using those horns to spar with one another, or to defend themselves from dragons. (the only thing large enough and strong enough to take down a unicorn, and the only creature with a thick enough hide to resist their horns. But even a lucky strike might pierce a dragon's heart...)

This actually fits pretty well with the aforementioned "guardian of wild spaces". I mean, a 10-20 foot tall unicorn with an 8+ foot horn... that's certainly an effective defense against any mortal disturbance. Not to mention that that image gives pretty strong "old forest god" vibes. (Giant moss mare / horse sapling, anyone?) This also ties in well with the magical healing part, if they do happen to be divine or otherwise supernatural in some way.

Same with the fierce and deadly point. Imagine them like hippos: unicorns don't necessarily look like the most deadly animal in the forest, but they kill more humans than any other woodland creature. Fool be the mortal who gets between a unicorn and anything else.

As a side note and fun fact, narwhal tusks are actually a single massive canine tooth (almost always the left one, though some may have both emerge, which is pretty interesting to see).

anyways guys congratulations on being aromantic. it's pride month everyone congratulate aromantic people <3

This poll is about someone making art of your original character (OC) without asking you first. For this poll, assume that the character is correctly attributed to you, and the art in and of itself is not objectionable– i.e. it's tame/clean (or no more sexualized, gory, political, etc. than your own work involving that OC). This is just about the act of someone making art of your OC without your express permission.

We ask your questions anonymously so you don’t have to! Submissions are open on the 1st and 15th of the month.

challenge for romance writers where they have to write a feelings realization scene without stating or implying that romance is in any way superior to any other relationship and if they fail i feed them to a bear

i think it's nice that people write books and it's possible to read them. often through the public library system