Is the old man cute?

Boss sponsoring Aston is literally the best thing to ever happen to the Nando fucker community. Every single race weekend, Boss somehow manages to kill mw further. Like the Media day outfits...okay fine, thank you for one-shotting me. TUXEDO PICTURE???? UNDONE TIE TUXEDO PICTURE???????? This picture felt like a nuclear bomb was dropped onto my house, I started suffocating and choking and barking. Boss. I'm going to need you to post more. How can they only post one????? Splay him out over the car, yeah, that's right, I see it in the background. Mob Boss Fernando, James Bond Fernando, Charity Gala Dilf Fernando, the amount of ideas this photo awakened in us is truly horrific

HE NEEDS TO DO A STRIP TEASE FOR ME RIGHT NOW!!!! He is giving so much middle aged divorced man at a yatch party rizz that i might just expire on the spot 😳 This weekend has just been me getting thrown into one wall to the next wall by old man looking so chewable and lickable and edible that it is making me physically sick. Just god i thought black was a good colour on him but WHITE?!?!!! with that undone black bowtie?!?!! I want to eat concrete and also eat his *GUNSHOTS*

Verdict: Hot (locking him up in my basement for nefarious reasons)

Fun fact: did you know that every single time Charles has DNFed this season, Fernando has gotten a podium? Often directly aided by Charles' removal from the race

Charles DNF in Bahrain -> practically handed Fernando the P3

Charles DNF in Australia -> removed himself from the competition, indirectly aiding Fernando to P3

Charles DNF in Zandvoort -> again, not directly, but boom, another Fernando podium

Charles DNS in Brazil -> crashed before the race even started, thus moving Fernando's starting position to P3 and yet again, removing himself from the competition and helping Fernando to the podium

The pattern sure is fascinating! With Fernando looking fast in p3 in fp2 we know what we are lighting a candle for 👀

Via

We want to fuck him but he wants to fuck the tires and their heating blanket. He spends his day guzzling oil, making sweet love to and in his car and spreading the Nando babygirl agenda on tiktok. The fact that he is smaller than the pile of tires, why are u so babygirl supreme, old man?!?!! Absolutely hilariously adorable picture, he is just the cutest little lego man

I cry laughing thinking about the "Fernando is shrinking!!!" misinformation posts because of this pic 😭 This actually might be my favorite 2023 picture of him, he's such a carfuckerlover. And there's literally Fernando x Tirestack lore!! Don't you remember him tugging them along in Australia 🥹 I'm just chronically obsessed with how little this picture makes him look, he's literally less than 4 tires tall!! The caption of this was literally "Fernando Alonso hugs his tirewarmers" and I was like "Yeah 🥹 he is hugging them 🥹" He's like a little kitty seeking heat

Verdict: Cute!(But I wish the old man would hug ME like this)

Senile old man maximizing his babygirl slay in his oversized team jacket. He is like a purse dog to me, carrying it around in my prettiest bag with a bedazzled collar. Petting him and squishing him and cuddling him, he is my beloved geriatric kitty 🥹

The first time he wore this jacket, I had a mental breakdown. I've seen people be like: "Why doesn't Aston give him a jacket that fits him blah blah blah." DON'T YOU KNOW HE'S ALWAYS BEEN INTO OVERSIZED OUTERWEAR WITH SWEATER PAWS!? That's literally step one in "How To Babygirlify Yourself." I still sob thinking about Canada quali where he somehow managed to change into this between parc ferme and the interviews, he just wanted to be comfy 🥹🥹

Verdict: Cute(so adorable, I want to wrap him up in a scarf and beanie and earmuffs)

Dilf? No that's a Milf that you will be wining dining and then 69ing (if they let you) He is going to critique your entire life, every major decision you have ever made in the past 10years, he will be running an in-depth interrogation about every interpersonal relationship you have and you will let them because you are pussy blind. This milf will be making you drink green smoothies and dragging you for 5am morning jogs. That one hand on the hip sass that made you drop all logic will also mark the end of your days 🫡😔

The combo of the Kim K sunglasses, sassy pose and the fucking cuffed jorts(out of frame) had me gasping for air when I first saw these. Like how the hell does he manage to make teamwear look so cunty????? I'd let this milf critique and sass the fuck out of me 🫠

Verdict: Cute (I would become a morning person for him)

He is sitting pussy facing the front, spreading his legs so I can crawl between them and *GUNSHOT* *GUNSHOT* *GUNSHOT* He is so absolutely boyishly handsome in this!!! The hair makes me want to bang my head against a wall, i need to get my hands on them and pull!! I miss you button up fireproofs, the slayage you caused on the masses will never be forgotten. Everything about this picture screams twink u want to make cry by *Train passes by*

They have to keep him in whatever glass enclosure he's in because we'd maul him if not. Ripping his fireproofs open so fast it'll just be one big *KKKKRITSCHHHHH*, and then I'll chew on all the velcro strips like a rabid dog. I am absolutely obsessed with his silver sparkly boots just out of frame, he knows he's that bitch!(I mean I'm pretty sure this is the race before singapore 2008 😳) I'm obsessed with his hands laying crossed so casually between his legs and the slight peak of wedding ring 🫠

Verdict: Cute (i need him to cry during sex)

He should have been at the club 😔

I THINK ABOUT THIS PICTURE SO MUCH!!!!!!! THE TONGUEEEEE!!!!!! Why is a 42 year old man so babygirl, the most babygirl even! The wink 😭😭😭😭😭😭 His half closed eyes are so adorable, it reminds me of a kitten 😭 I love when Aston feeds us babygirlified photos like this. I want to squeeze him like a stress ball

SIR?!?!? WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS TO US!?!? Everytime I look at this picture I want to jump through it and pin him to the floor and bite his tongue. This picture causes extreme mental and physical anguish for me. Let me get my paws on you old man 😡

Verdict: Cute (need to leave a bruise on his lips)

Bro stop staring at me with those eyes. This is weirdly disconcerting. It's like he's telling you to buckle up because he's gonna be the one causing the car accident. But also like why is he trying to seduce me in a car safety ad 😭 the vibe is so strange. "Today 3,500 will die on the road", yeah because of YOU.

This reminds me of guys in uni who would drunk drive. Some points for the hair and the beard but the gaze is making me uncomfortable. It's giving men in public transports who will not stop staring till you get off at your station.

Verdict: NOT CUTE(I feel like he's going to commit vehicular manslaughter)

They were whoring him out since day one, this is literally from 2001 😭😭😭 "Get in the hot tub Fernando and earn your seat." I'm sure Flavio was behind this somehow....But why do all 2000s photoshoots look like they're the start of a porno!? I'm not complaining but this really looks like it could be titled "fun night with a twink in a hottub!" But also for him being shirtless in a hot tub, its not really sexy...? He's too baby at this point!

Flavio's only advertising philosophy with Nando was to consistently whore the Spanish twink out to the masses. We respect a man who does not mind sharing the beauty of his babygirl with the plebs but he is too baby here. Adorable but I feel like patting his head, giving him a juice box and then handing him a towel 😔

Verdict: Cute (but not that cute, in a "baby brother of your friend" way)

WHAT A PODIUM DOES TO A MAN, GOOD LORD!!!!! He looked so young on the podium, it's funny because he said to Checo: "I'm old please don't stress me our so much next time," yet he seems to have de-aged about 10 years????? I am obsessed with literally every single thing in this picture, I actually screamed when I first saw it. The way his eyes scrunch up like a kitten and you can't even see his eyes, just his lashes and a bit of anime eye sparkle. AND HIS NOSE SCRUNCH!!!!! AND HIS WET CURLY HAIR!!!! He just looks so fucking happy ;;;;

I am still in meltdown mode, he looked GOLDEN AND RADIANT AND BEAUTIFUL!!! He is the sun and I am blinded by its brilliance. That smile has DESTROYED me. Everytime I see this picture i curl up on the floor in a fetal position and start sobbing. AND THE CURLS!!! HAVE WE TALKED ABOUT THE CURLS BECAUSE INSANE INSANE INSANE!!! This picture added back the ten years those last laps took from me. I am sosoosososo happy and this is like a cherry on top of the most perfect sundae. I feel like screaming and never stopping and i will never be getting over anything ever again 😭😭

Verdict: CUTE(can I please take him home in a crate with me???)

This pictures throws me into hysterics every time I see it. I hate the misogyny of old f1 but it also gave us pics like this where it looks like Nando is standing next to an Amazonian who's legs are literally the size of his body. Maybe Nando should be the one put in lingerie and tall boots next time

He is trying to exchange their heights through the power of wishful thinking and open staring. They should infact put him in lingerie, knee high boots, cat ears and a tail for my viewing pleasure

Verdict: Cute!!(So tiny and small!!!! Baby!!!!)

I think this is the pic that caused everyone to be in a Stockholm situation with Aston in 2023. Like how can you hate a team that gives us pics of Fernando like this!? HE IS SO KITTY CAT IN THIS!!!! All curled up on the counter, as small as possible, but also to have a vantage point! He needs to wear the all black racesuit again, it makes me so unwell 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫 think of the black fireproofs and how good he looks! Now imagine getting that all the time.

He is two apples tall, sitting on a counter, tempting the masses. This engages my predator instinct, we should all come together to kidnap the babygirl 😤 Oh to sit and stare at a smiling and laughing Nando, aston staff how does it feel to live my dream 🙄🔪

Verdict: Cute!(I want to pick him up and cuddle him)

He is pushing his tits to the front so I CAN GRAB EM AND BITE EM AND *i am dragged off stage screaming* he might not be slaying in the sprint but he is definitely slaying absolute cunt looking like a puppy dog tortured soul Lucifer before the fall. The worse the torture gets, the more he starts whoring himself out on camera. I need to lay him down on a table and make him girl feast. I am squeezing him like a block of slime between my hands. I am running up the walls like a frenzied lizard. I am absolutely NOT recovering from this.

Okay like it's literal fact at this point that the more he suffers the hotter he gets!?!??!? We didn't see much of him yesterday and that's probably because he got a good result, yet today??? Today when he dnfs??? We get FED. The way he punctuates his answers with smiles in interviews makes me FUCKING SCREAM!!!! The angelic lighting in this is so unfair, how is he allowed to ruin my life like this in a SPRINT SHOOTOUT interview!?!??!! His beautifully fluffy cotton candy hair tufts are going to ruin me, he is literally glowing!!!! Angelic Fernando Alonso is not going to leave my thoughts for the rest of time.

Verdict: Cute (squeezing and biting and swallowing him whole)

In the war against evil we stand on the side of evil 🫡

This blog seeks to represent the mutual will and opinions of nando fuckers so I'm glad to hear it's doing its job 😭

Thank you for the support anon 🥹🩷