goes ding when there's stuff

The thing that gets me about the impending Harry Potter show is like. I'm able to, for entirely hypothetical purposes, put aside my disdain and disgust for the author's full-tilt bigotry and put myself in the shoes of someone who's still a Fan, like I would be if the author hadn't doubled, tripled, and quadrupled down on being a full-tilt bigot, and even then, imagining the alternate universe where JKR remained a staunch ally and well-meaning if clueless liberal philanthropic darling, I still can't quite wrap my head around why I'd want this show to be made

Everyone keeps saying it's going to be a Faithful Adaptation Of The Series and I'm just like... okay? This isn't A Series Of Unfortunate Events that got a bad adaptation and they had to go back and try again to get it right. The majority of fans liked and continue to like the movies, a lot, and despite some minor quibbles here and there, they're considered incredibly faithful adaptations. The Fandom isn't exactly divided on this, either.

Like, I imagine a nearby alternate timeline where JKR was never hit by the Idiot Stick That Makes You Hate Women and remained normal, and I remained a fan of a flawed but influential children's fantasy series, and I can't really think of a reason why I would be excited about them trying to make lightning strike a second time. Are people really that mad about Michael Gambon saying "Harry did you put your name in the goblet of fire" animatedly instead of calmly? Or is WB just worried that the incoming demographic of theme park attendees have nowhere near the nostalgic link to the series that millennials would, and that if they don't inject the series back into the zeitgeist, the golden goose might stop laying eggs?

If JK Rowling hadn't gone full terf and this remake was happening then we'd all be wearily rolling our eyes at yet another carriage being hitched to the endless train of unnecessarily remade hits that nobody wants. People would be joking about "they're making a live action Harry Potter now" (the joke of course being that the previous one was also live action this time so they don't even have the normal excuse). People would revive old comparisons of Lion King shots and Mulan shots and put up Harry Potter ones next to them and joke about how expressive the animation is in the original. I can't see any world in which anyone would want this.

Federal workers are going off.

The tragedy of my life is that I keep acquiring and displaying fetish art and having to be corrected by my friends.

Most recently, a friend came over my house and saw my computer background and went, "Wow, um, I didn't know you were into that." To which I look at the picture of the well drawn muscular female minotaur in historically accurate Greek clothing and I start geeking out about how I love the detail the artist did with the clothing and I point out the period appropriate folds and pins, how the artist even inserted the native plant that was used to dye the clothing this particular shade in the background, and even how the belt has technology AND historically accurate weaving patterns on it.

Then I start explaining how I love the muscular choices of the minotaur, that I was so impressed with the artist's anatomically correct depiction of the muscles converging into the neck. That many people get an upright cow's neck wrong because cow's don't have collarbones, so it can be very difficult to merge the upper arms and a chest of a human with a cow's body. I draw her attention to the beautiful way they've merged the pectoralis major so smoothly while also staying true to how muscular they've depicted the rest of the body.

I finish up with my thoughts on the artist's bold choice to depict the minotaur as a female, and despite the underlying themes of a minotaur being violence, child murder, strength, and muscles. I segue into how unlike bulls, cow are perceived as mothers. That they are the major source of milk in human culture, and that idyllic depictions of them in a field usually depict calves frolicking nearby, yet the minotaur kills and eats children.

I finish and there is a long pause.

"Urban, this is fetish art." and she takes me to the artist's twitter and god dammit it's fetish art, not a bold statement on cultural perceptions of women and violence throughout history. I have been tricked again.

So I just wanted to expand upon the fact that I don't believe the art is bad, craftmanshipwise or morally, but that I am so faceblind to it for some reason, that even my tiny hundred year old Catholic grandmother is like, "Urban, why have you displayed this oil painting of the pornography in your kitchen?" And I have to explain to her that, "Grandma, I really thought it was just someone being incredibly enthusiastic about eating cake in a wedding dress, and you know how I love wedding dresses from the 20th centaury."

Also, I didn't want to admit this in the original post because it really is embarrassing, but after I was shocked to discover minotaur lady was more than I had assumed, my friend looked me square in the eye and pointed out how on the Amphora vase in the background, there is a depiction of another female minotaur leading a man on a leash. So this situation is very obvious, but it's like a magic eye picture that everyone in the world can see but me.

#i love this actually. #OP your kink blindness has led you to discover what many other people never realize: #extreme fetish artists make some of the most interesting and thoughtful artistic decisions of any big art genre #the period-accurate folds and the thought put into the gender dynamics didn't happen by accident! #artist lovingly rendered it all in perfect detail because the whole thing is hot to them. and got to connect with you. by accident #hilarious. i've been the kink person in this scenario so many times (though never about minotaurs). i love it. #'why is that guy on a leash' me panicking: um i'm a horror writer playing with a traditionally male expectation of control. yeah (via @crimeronan)

how i'm handling my students using AI to write papers:

-don't accuse them on using AI from the get-go and instead ask them to informally define all the huge words that they used in their essay which i know they don't know the meaning of

-ask to see their original file where they "wrote" the essay. go to version history to see if it was just copy and pasted and then just edited a bit. i keep an eye out for the shit like "certainly! here's an essay about...."

-if they own up to it, they can re-do the assignment for a higher grade even if there will be an automatic penalty. if they don't, i process it like plagiarism and get my supervisor involved.

And this is much better than the immediate accusations. Some students have a good vocabulary. Stop accusing them of faking their essays without proof, and this is a good way to check.

Fellow students please stop using AI, go back to promising not to kill the school nerd if they do all your homework or something.

hakoda borrowed it and forgot to give it back <3

Yarrow loves to be up high.

and theres a dog on his head

"It seemed to be a chronic disease. It was as if even the most intelligent person had this little blank spot in their heads where someone had written: "Kings. What a good idea." Whoever had created humanity had left in a major design flaw. It was its tendency to bend at the knees."

-Terry Pratchett, Feet of Clay

This may be controversial but I think roy mustang as a Persona is getting pegged. Like he’s done the reading he’s a man of experience. If the subject came up he’d be like “well of course I get pegged. I’m a red blooded heterosexual man” But roy mustang the man? The actual fictional person and his lived experience? I don’t think he’s been pegged. It’s not that I don’t think he’d be into it but I also think hes probably only having sex with riza and they only do it every couple years and then get all guilty about it. There hasn’t been a lot of time for trying things out

It’s so crazy how you can measure the shifts in culture based on which race Ariana is pretending to be

America is absolutely disconnected to meat

I think I realized this when I had went to see my dad and stepmom one day and asked if I could place my hawk’s food. (A rabbit leg) in the freezer. My step mom was disgusted by the idea that a leg from an animal was in the freezer meanwhile an entire chicken was sitting in the fridge.

Your rotisserie chicken is an entire chicken.

Your pork chop is a hunk of pig.

Your rack of ribs are from a cow’s rib cage.

It’s like Americans view meat as colorful red and pink hued shapes that just exist and come into the world packaged.

You see so many people getting harassed or even having their content flagged for showing how to process or field dress meat when it’s at it’s freshest. Right after culling. For some reason this is considered “gore” by many folks when in reality it’s no more different from plucking a processed chicken after cull.

You also notice that Americans have an idea of what’s normal meat and what isn’t normal meat and there’s racist undertones that I’ve noticed in a lot of these comments left on foreign cooking videos

You have people that claim a video of a man in a different country preparing something like this is “eating a dog.” Meanwhile this is roasted goat.

You have people who’s only perception of an edible fish is in fillet or fish stick form and they call something like this nasty because “Eww there’s a head!” Yeah.. most animals have heads..

Some of ya’ll need to realize what your meat looks like prior to processing and that it’s prepared in different ways. We also need to erase the stigma behind non traditional meats.

Truly, genuinely, as an indigenous person I talk about this exact thing a LOT! Like, don't get me wrong I get a bit squicked when dressing a chicken or gutting and cleaning a fish, lord knows I had really mixed feelings the first time I saw a deers throat slit (I thought it was cruel, until my elder asked me if I would have preferred to let it suffer instead) The truth of the matter is that animals and humans are intertwined. We are food to one another, that's the way of the world and I think people forget that when we champion for humane treatment of animals and when we rail against factory farming we need to remember that removing death is not the goal, removing undue suffering it.

Freya Allan as CIRILLA OF CINTRA ◈ 2.03 What Is Lost

the purest form of serotonin is when a cat looks at u and u go like “what?” and it meows at u

like, that is a very unspecific response I still have no idea what you want but I applaud how adorably you meowed all the same, well done

This post led me to reminisce on the nature of cat’s meowing, and I have a funny story

I befriended a feral cat once who had spent her life in the forest without human interaction. I was worried about her because she had a paw damaged from an old injury and was emaciated but obviously nursing kittens that were hidden away somewhere. It took me weeks of putting out food and sitting across the yard every evening for her to trust me even a little and when she decided we were friends and she expected dinner every night she started coming to my door and trying to call for me in the evening, but she didn’t meow. Why would she? Cats only meow naturally as kittens when their vocal chords/ears aren’t fully developed, adult cats communicate with vocalizations that aren’t audible to humans. She probably tried making noises I couldn’t hear to call me but ended up sticking to the one I always responded to- a horrible yowling growl that she had made at me when we first encountered each other in the forest. Except once we were friends she would make this noise while purring and rubbing affectionately against a nearby tree or the porch railing (because she didn’t want to touch me yet). This understandably freaked my family members out but I was touched that she had taken the time to find a way to basically yell FUCK OFF in an affectionate way.

Fast forward to when she finally trusts me enough to bring her hidden kittens out of the forest to me, long story short I gained their trust and put them in this big pen, that I had previously used to keep chickens in, so they’d be safe and to keep her from having another litter. Except she was already secretly pregnant again! (Fix your pets, guys, they make SO many babies) and ended up having her new babies in this pen. I kept my distance, sitting on the outside once they were born until she seemed comfortable enough to let me come inside. The kittens were a bit wild, hissing viscously at me as soon as they opened their eyes, but they warmed up to me. There were four of them and soon they all wanted to be the center of attention during the twice daily play sessions. I’d be playing with one and another would meow insistently behind me and I’d immediately answer them and give them love, teaching them that humans could be friends that answer their needs- making them adoptable once they were weaned. Mama cat (Artie) would just watch me play with them, and I guess she was doing some thinking because one day when they were about a month old I was playing with them and one meowed behind me. I was confused because I hadn’t realized there was a kitten behind me and when I turned, there wasn’t. The only cat there was Artie looking at me really intensely. I turned back around to the kittens and I heard the meow again, I turned back to Artie and responded in the way I always did with the kittens “yes baby?” And she meowed again in an exact imitation of her kittens! After that she would.not.shut.up. It was like she had cracked some kind of code, meowing for attention and snacks and just to say hi. Her two older kittens, the ones she’d had in the forest, had never meowed at me either but started to once they saw how I responded to their mom. and I find it endlessly fascinating because before that it had never occurred to me that cats only meow at humans because they were taught by other cats to keep meowing past kittenhood because that’s the best way to get a human’s attention.

Imagine befriending some weird giant with the wrong number of legs that you met in the forest who seems nice enough but doesn’t seem to be able to hear you, until your friend explains that all they can understand is fuck off! And I’m a baby give me love!

IF NOT FOR EAT WHY CAKE?

IF NOT FOR MOUTH WHY HONEYCOMB?

IF NOT FOOD WHY LOOK LIKE FORBIDDEN SNACK?

I dreamed that I was playing mariokart and there was a track that took 3 days to complete and when I somehow managed to get 1st place a popup came onscreen that had a pic of koopa troopa and text that read “congratulations!! you’re gonna have so much sex” and I started laughing so hard I woke up

this is what happens when you win in mariokart world