Writer, Reader, And Basketcase

Actually, I know damn well Darcy never sat down and thought about marrying Lizzie. If he had, it would have been a week before he was rounding up Bingley, sitting him down, and looking him in the eye like he was about to propose high treason and going, "Jane. You still down bad for her?"

Coin toss whether Bingley would actually get to answer before Darcy turned around and flipped over a whiteboard like

and launched right into the most detailed migration pattern known to Regency England to keep the extraneous Bennets as contained as humanly possible by rotating them between various Bingley/Darcy estates. Like, we're talking about trading them off for minor holidays a decade out kind of detailed.

"If you and Jane take them for Lady Day ten years hence, Elizabeth and I will take them for Michaelmas. We'll all be together for Christmas and Midsummer, so we'll divide the responsibility individually on those days."

This would be followed by thirteen different spreadsheets projecting joint expenditures so Bingley knows what sort of financial commitment he'll be shouldering and how to minimize it, what proportion Darcy will take care of, what the estate plans are in case Darcy predeceases anybody, when they should probably roll out various stages to keep it from affecting their respective sisters' ability to maximize their own husband-hunting--whole nine yards.

Darcy does not know that he'll probably be murdered when the Bingley sisters find out why he asked for their social calendars. He'd be marginally fine with that at this point, because the fucking Napoleonic War campaigns were not as meticulously planned as his roadmap to getting the other three Bennets satisfactorily married, and Darcy feels about as able as if he'd spent the last year on Elba.

It takes Bingley a few minutes to realize why this is happening, then he's like

"You proposed to Elizabeth?! Congratulations!"

Darcy... knew there was something he was forgetting.

That man would have kicked the Collins's door open with four binders tucked under each arm, dumped them in a pile in front of Elizabeth, and loudly announced that if they get married tomorrow he can have her entire family except for Jane extraordinary renditioned to the Scottish moors by Sunday and then been like

"Why are you yelling at me?! I promise you, it will work! You'll never see anyone in your family except for Jane again, I swear it!" when she starts yelling at him.

i like working at plant store. sometimes you ring up someone and there's a slug on their plant and so you're like "Oh haha you've got a friend there let me get that for you" and you put the slug on your hand for safekeeping but then its really busy and you dont have time to take the slug outside before the next customer in line so you just have a slug chilling on your hand for 15 minutes. really makes you feel at peace with nature. also it means sometimes i get to say my favorite line which is "would you like this free slug with your purchase"

@holyknuckled you get it. lterally what are we here on earth for if not to occasionally impose gastropods upon unsuspecting customers. this story is delightful

@holyknuckled like that?

oh? my god???

yeah, Exactly like that

The Whole of Our Hearts

The end of the All in the Golden Afternoon series.

Tomorrow, doortime

Stardust In Our Souls by Larrysmomfics Completed story posting every Saturday as a WIP!

Explicit | Magic AU with a soulmate twist | Slow Burn-ish | Angst | Humor | Smut | Banter | OT5 | So much of the Styles siblings | Witch/Botanical shop owner Harry | Investigative Journalist Louis | Supernatural Elements | Familiars | Witchcraft | Death and Grief |

The death and grief is mostly mentions, however, MCD IS tagged, but I PROMISE it’s the happiest ending!

Harry Styles refuses to fall in love. After finding out about a generational family curse as a ten year old boy, young witch Harry casts a spell to ensure that he'll never find his true love so that he'll never have to experience the heartbreak of losing them.

Fast forward to present day.

With the curse still looming over his and his sister's heads, and no endeavors to help by the Witch Council, Harry decides to send out his own call for help by coming out to the world...as a witch. What he doesn't anticipate is that his coming out video will end up going viral, garnering the attention of not only the Witch Council, but inadvertently summoning the soulmate his ten year old self unknowingly bound to him all those years ago. Harry’s pursuit to break the curse ensues with the enlisted help of his soulmate, unaware investigative journalist Louis Tomlinson.

With a few twists and turns along the path to discovering the origin of the curse, Harry embarks upon a journey of righting past wrongs, solving an unforeseen mystery, and unintentionally entangles himself in an unexpected side quest as well- falling in love.

OR

The witchrry fic inspired by Practical Magic with Stevie Nicks as the High Priestess of Harry’s coven.

Chapters 1-12 out now! READ HERE on AO3!

🔮✨🌱🌙

She’s a completed work now! There will be an Epilogue eventually, but I’m taking my time with it. For all of you who read this as a WIP, thank you so much for coming on this journey with me!

they need to start making clothes out of material that can clean glasses well again

I was just sitting here, wondering to myself if fanfic authors know how much joy I get when I see they’ve posted a new chapter.

And the little voice in my head reminded me that *I* am a fanfic author.

But that couldn’t possibly be true for *my* story because well…it’s mine.

And if that thought process didn’t perfectly sum up what it’s like to be an artist or creator, then I don’t know what will

The Island of Misfit Boys (E, 43k) by bananaheathen

The Mates prequel is here. I love her. I love you. 💛

writing is hard but coming up with a cunty title and catchy summary will slay even god's strongest soldier

If you read the fic, leave the kudos. Leave a comment too, if possible. Just do it. It takes a few seconds of your time and it means the world to the writer.

Sincerely, me who just got told that my writing feels like watching a blockbuster movie. I don't care if they were sincere or not, I'll be thinking about that comment for the rest of my life and every time I feel bad about my art, I'll remember that someone once liked it.

🤣 You Ain’t Gotta Feel Fear Just Mingle by LadyLondonderry / @londonfoginacup

(T, 32k, coworkers) Harry has been at his dream job for less than three months, and he knows two things for sure; first, his project manager doesn't know what he's doing, and second, someone in the office is apparently pure evil, and no one will tell Harry who it is.

🤣 Your Reign is Free (to give along to Santa) by LadyLondonderry / @londonfoginacup

(T, 28k, established relationship) Harry and Louis have some friends coming by, and some totally normal birthday and Christmas plans. It’s a totally typical totally normal Christmas Eve.

🤣 Colorful Hearts by @larrysmomfics

(M, 20k, therapist Harry) In a world where orgasmic emissions change color depending on the person’s mood, Louis Tomlinson’s semen has only ever been blue. At the recommendation of his doctor he attends a support group for people with similar conditions.

🤣 Man, Deconstructed by jacaranda_bloom / @jacaranda-bloom

(E, 13k, strangers to lovers) the one where a well-meaning best mate, a sculpture-worthy arse, and a heaping dose of misunderstanding combine to create sheer and utter chaos, and also, maybe, the best thing Harry’s ever found.

🤣 Foolishly Laying Our Hearts On The Table by runaway_train / @runaway-train-works

(E, 11k, friends to lovers) The one where Harry is in love with his best friend Louis but doesn't think he stands a chance until some wisdom teeth and a rather unusual confession might just change his mind.

🤣 Just Your Jinx by @larryatendoftheday

(T, 10k, witch Harry) Harry Styles may or may not have accidentally jinxed his extremely fit new neighbor, and it's not so easy to make things right.

🤣 For a day by bluegreenish / @greenblueish

(T, 9k, body swap) the one where Harry wakes up in Louis' body, Louis in Liam's, Liam in Niall's, Niall in Harry's and no one picked Zayn.

🤣 You smile all the time ('cause how can you not show it?) by thebreadvan / @thebreadvansstuff

(E, 9k, dentist Louis) Harry never liked dentists, until now.

🤣 Let the Feeling Last by @allwaswell16

(T, 5k, omegaverse) Omega Harry thinks the alpha at the grocery store buying a cart full of vegetables must be an amazing chef. He doesn't know that Alpha Louis is feeding all those vegetables to his pet pig.

🤣 That’s the way love goes by bella28

(T, 4k, famous/not famous)  In a world, where soulmate geese are sent to the people who can't figure out who their soulmate is, Harry finds himself stuck with a goose when he is attending a concert of his favourite artist Louis Tomlinson.

🤣 Livin' In A Daydream by @lululawrence

(NR, 3k, roommates) Harry originally had thought that the sock he had pulled out was just another one of Louis’ sport socks he left balled up, but when Harry pulled the cuff out, he realized the actual sole of the sock felt… crusty.

🤣 Charm Your Pants Off by 4ureyesonly28 / @evilovesyou

(G, 2k, doctor Louis) When Harry hurt himself in front of all of his coworkers, he thought his Christmas Eve couldn’t get any worse. That was, until he ended up in an actual ambulance.

🤣 Into the Woods by @kingsofeverything

(E, 2k, magical realism) Whenever he hikes, Harry keeps an eye out for trees with knots and scars that resemble buttholes. What started as fodder for his silly little Instagram account has become his favorite way to masturbate.

🤣 an honest mistake by @disgruntledkittenface

(NR, 2k, neighbors) Louis has ridden the elevator with his neighbor all week. The first time they speak, there’s a misunderstanding.

🤣 Stole My Heart by @haztobegood

(NR, 2k, strangers to lovers) I just reached into a box of free samples outside that new chicken restaurant. Only it wasn’t free samples. It was a man. Holding a box of chicken nuggets. His chicken nuggets. I stole this man’s food, Niall!

🤣 like a dream but i wasn't asleep by @alwaysxlarrie

(G, 2k, strangers to lovers) Harry just wants to get into his hotel room and go to bed. It should be a simple task, but it’s made more challenging by his complicated relationship with gravity, a booking mixup, and a really hot guy.

🤣 Eyes so blue, Shorts so red by nonsensedarling / @absoloutenonsense

(G, 2k, alien Harry) Harry isn't like any roommate Louis has had before. For one, he doesn't know what a poem is (or skee-ball, for that matter), but luckily for him, Louis doesn't mind answering any and all of his questions.

🤣 Harry, That Kills People by LadyLondonderry / @londonfoginacup

(T, 2k, organized crime) If there’s one thing that Harry hates, it’s getting his clothes dirty. If there’s one other thing that Harry hates, it’s murder.

🤣 I Got the Recipe (And It's Called Black Magic) by @fallinglikethis

(T, 10k, Liam/Louis) Louis needs to believe in love again, and with a little help from Almost-Liam Payne, Harry makes it happen.

🤣 The Duke and the Poor Sods Who Work For Him (series) by LadyLondonderry / @londonfoginacup

(T, 8k, Zayn/Liam, Louis/Harry, Niall/Lewis Capaldi) “I have decided,” Louis Tomlinson, Duke of Elbany announces as he flounces into the room, “that we must have a hermit for our woods!” Liam Payne, not a Duke of much of anything, is very used to statements like these. They make him tired. “A… hermit, sir?”

🤣 driver's license by wordsnnotes / @quelsentiment

(T, 6k, Zayn/Louis) Louis is taking the exam to get his driver’s licence for the 3rd time (okay, sue him), and the examiner keeps getting under his skin. When they suddenly get stranded in the middle of a snow storm, they have to learn to cooperate.

🤣 With This Wing, I Thee Wed by LadyAJ_13 / @ladyaj-13

(T, 4k, Niall/Louis) Niall crosses his arms and pouts, a little line appearing between his eyebrows. “I want Nandos. I like Nandos.” “And I like my dignity,” Louis mutters.

whatever. it’s relevant.

There are two types of writers:

1. 'It's fiction, it doesn't need to make sense!'

2. 'I didn't account for the rotation of the planet and how that affects the constalations while my characters stargazed at different times of year, I have failed as a writer, and this entire thing is trash'

Love myself as a person, hate myself as a writer.

hey authors :D so this post applies to EVERYONE, but especially those of y’all with anxiety or OCD

if you are writing something that has a stereotypical trope?? that’s perfectly okay. even if it’s a trope that you see a lot of people on the internet whining about.

it’s okay. it’s okay if you have a love triangle, or a miscommunication incident, or.. well i’m having a hard time thinking of more examples of tropes, it’s a little bit late and it’s been a long day, but i just want y’all to know that it is YOUR story. YOUR writing.

why tf would you want to spend all your time writing something you don’t even like??? if you want to write about something but most people think that it’s ‘cringe’ or ‘cliche’, you should still absolutely go for it!!!

because after all, your stories are for YOU. maybe other people can read them too, if you’re posting or publishing them, but at the end of the day they’re ultimately for you.

you CANNOT make everyone happy. so PLEASE do not cut out things that make you happy just so you can try to make your writing more palatable to snobs on the internet who don’t realize that they can just choose not to read things that they don’t personally enjoy.

this was kind of long. anyways i hope y’all have a nice day/night :D

🪻The Anticipation Of Knowing You by toastnbeans [13k]

After Louis overhears his next door neighbor having sex, he doesn’t really expect anything but awkward hallway encounters to come from it. Instead, he’s surprised to find himself in a whirlwind pen pal relationship with the sweet, albeit loud, baker next door.

🪻Home For The Holiday by @larrysmomfics [86k]

A "The Holiday" inspired AU where Harry meets Louis after agreeing to swap houses with a stranger on the internet for three weeks over the holidays.

🪻However Do You Want Me, However Do You Need Me by @moonshinelouis [7k]

Louis loves Harry—he loves being his boyfriend, loves being soft and gentle with the person he cares for the most. But there must be something seriously wrong with him; why would he crave to be rough in a moment so delicate, with a person he’d never otherwise dream of hurting?

🪻Just Hear This And Then I'll Go by @allwaswell16 [44k]

Former boy band member Louis Tomlinson can’t stand pompous indie artist Harry Styles, but with a new record label to launch he is going to have to endure his pretensions to snag up and coming new artist Liam Payne, who happens to be Harry’s oldest friend. Luckily, Liam seems to be very interested in 78 Records and maybe a little more than interested in Louis’ best friend. Too bad Harry won’t be making this easy on any of them.

🪻Lonely Cards Club by @hellolovers13 [25k]

Harry's life in Cardiff is rather uneventful. Until he receives a strange Christmas postcard. It gets even stranger when he finds another one the next day. An Advent story about missed opportunities and second chances.

🪻Take My Breath Away by @realitybetterthanfiction [153k]

Lt. Harry Styles, call sign Sparrow, is a prodigy when it comes to flying. The owner of an unrivaled Naval pedigree, being a pilot was always written in the stars for Harry. With his trusty RIO, Lt. Niall Horan, Harry has made an unprecedented ascension in the ranks of the Naval aerial combat elite, and has been recruited to the esteemed Premier Delta flight school, carrying on his family’s legacy. What he finds there are unexpected friendships, perilous challenges, and something beyond what he ever thought possible. Because as his father had always told him, before the great Captain Styles went tragically missing in combat, you don’t fall in love with the sky, you fall in love with what keeps you on the ground.

🪻The Oldest Magic Word by @kingsofeverything [18k]

Louis gets called up to play Seeker for the English National Team and when he gets there, he finds out that Harry Styles, his old school crush, is the Team Healer.

🪻After All This Time by lovelarry10 @chloehl10 [36k]

Louis and Harry have been best friends since a fateful meeting on the Hogwarts Express seven years ago. With their time at Hogwarts coming to an end, their friends are determined to make them see that perhaps they've always destined to be more than just friends. Prompted into reliving some of their most vivid moments at Hogwarts, Louis and Harry come to a startling realisation... that just maybe, after all this time, they're meant to be each others. Always.

🪻You're All I Dreamed Of by staybeautiful @harruandlou [53k]

Harry sank lower until his chin was hovering just above the water line. He had his mug balancing precariously against the lip of the bath. It had to be cooling already, but he still looked serene, like there was nowhere else he’d rather be.

“I could live here,” Harry said, smiling with his eyes closed.

It was as if the words sprung from Louis’ mind, his mouth, and twisted into Harry’s. His heart picked up and before he could stop them they were tumbling out.

“Okay, you should,” he stuttered and Harry turned to look at him. “You should move in with me.”

Or after a Monday lunch with Zayn, Louis finds himself reevaluating what "too soon" means, especially when it comes to Harry.

🪻Temporary Tattoos, Hotel Hearts, Horizon Homes by teumessian [17k]

Louis is just 18 and ends up in 2015 for one day at Harry’s request, one day to make sure his spirit is strong and hopeful enough to take him to the X Factor and end him up where he’s supposed to be. Aka, the one where Harry makes sure Louis knows how amazing he is.

🪻Making The Grade by hachimanskitsune [151k]

His last Dom/boyfriend outed him to his entire graduate school faculty leaving Harry to flee Glasgow. Some tough love from his mum sees him moving to London to room with his best mate. With a bit of luck he gets into graduate school to finish his Masters Degree and managed to score an assistantship position for a professor to cover his tuition.

Things were finally coming together, but he missed submitting. When his best mate decides to drag him to a local kink club, Harry thinks it's a mistake, but he needs the relief. A chance encounter with a fantastic Dom at the club leads to an intense scene that rebalances him emotionally -- until Harry shows up to meet his new mentor the following week and finds himself face-to-face with the same blue eyes that dropped him to his knees two nights before.

Harry curses his luck of finding the perfect Dom, only to have him be the one man he couldn't ethically have. Can they find a balance between desire and duty?

🪻Relaxed Daddy, Tamed Bratty by @somedovesfly [9k]

Established d/s Larry. Louis has a stressful day at work and asks subby Harry to give him sensory deprivation to relax and decompress. However, the brat in him can't resist playing with his tied up Dom and Louis is more than happy to give him some fun-ishment for misbehaving.

or A realistic BDSM story about how couples use kink for not just sex, but also stress relief.

Total Fics Read: 12

since it’s a scary time to be trans: refuge restrooms is an app which maps gender-neutral/single-stall restrooms. it’s community-mapped, so it’s possible you might be the first person to log the restroom locations, but hopefully it’ll help some people.

please reblog this post if you’ve got trans followers. stay safe.

For my non-trans followers: please consider getting the app just so you can add neutral restrooms to the map when you run across them. Simple way to help.

This is absolutely still a thing, for anyone wondering!

We keep each other safe! This is one way to help, whether you’re trans or not!