one star uber driver named "wife of tarantula"

isnt there a better picture they could have used

cicadas :-) ⭐️

when i go in a room and forget what i needed i become a point and click protagonist. [water bottle?] that’s not helpful right now. [socks?] i don’t know what to do with that. [charger?] that’s not helpful right now. [scissors?] i can’t do anything with that. [water bottle?] that’s not helpful right now. [lone paperclip?] that’s not helpful right now. [water bottle?]

i'm actually the most beautiful¹ girl² in the world³

¹ decently attractive

² multigender person

³ massachusetts

i don't have an astigmatism. my sight is just blurry because of the love. love softens things around the edges

I can appreciate a man who's normal but I LOVE a man who's comparatively normal. A man who seems like a mess in a vacuum but as soon as you compare them to their friend circle you're like "oh. Oh wow. You're their idea of sensible."

how about you stop eating po’ boys with the low boys and start eating broccoli and beef with the commander in chief

HOBBES vs. TIGGER cage match TO THE DEATH say goodbye to your childhood because ONE! WILL!! DIE!!!!

Picturing two tiger plushies just kind of sitting there facing each other in Thunderdome

i am picturing it

Hobbes and Tigger would find some aspect of tigerhood to bond over, but Calvin would put Christopher Robin in the ground.

this is problematic of me (joke) but i really enjoy the splashing of french into english speech or writing. just adds a pizzazz

*adds a certain je ne sais quoi

see the problem is that despite around 8 years of french schooling the french language has utterly escaped my brain so even the most obvious set up i had created for myself by accident was missed by me. such is life.

*c'est la vie

god damn it

for april fools we’re deleting this entire site sayonara you weeaboo shits

Trans visibility has gotten scarier for years now, and the trans people celebrating today are extraordinary. I love every single one of my trans siblings, including the ones who don't want to be visible today or can't be. Stay safe, and don't let them take your pride away from you.

reblog to give your headache to elon musk instead

em dash is so fucking sexy. puts her in a paragraph 8 times.

being a symbolism enjoyer should humble you because at the end of the day no matter how eloquently you articulate it youre essentially saying "i love it when things have meaning"

my hobbies are Colours and Shapes but, like, in a mature, sophisticated adult way