this one is a bit difficult to describe, so i'll ramble for a second to try

people who grow up around or involved in toxic or abusive relationships tend to seek those types of relationships even when things are eventually going well, because that's what their brain is used to

kind of in a "the pain you know is better than the one you don't" way

that kind of behaviour is a lot of the time compared to feeling like a dog (especially if the abusive/toxic relationships created dehumanizing feelings)

abusers can love victims, and victims can love abusers toxic relationships can have love on both sides

love is never an excuse for putting someone else through hell

!! CELEBRATE EMOJI STIMBOARD !!

It took every actual fiber of my being to not add a gif with kamala harris in it because it would have actually been so fucking funny ou guys don't know. I resisted the impulsive thoughts......... who cheered

Emoji in the center by @meeb-motes !! Go follow it hes so cool....

x | x | x x | x | x x | x | x

A serious post.

TW: Abuse , Manipulation tactics , Love bombing

( sorry if anything is misspelled or confusing)

Hello everyone ! We wanted to try and keep this as private as we could but we felt you all deserve an explanation why we haven’t been posting as much here as usual.

We are currently healing from an abusive relationship we were in. We have made multiple posts about it in our discord so we thought we should share a bit more here.

We were in a relationship with a person , let’s call them L for around a month. The first conversation we ever had with them was them sending us a gift of nitro , around 10 dollars. They then went and excessively flattered us , asking us invasive personal questions which we answered due to thinking they had good intentions. We now realized that this was Love Bombing.

Long story short they would become jealous and angry if we talked to our close friend , would constantly ask questions about said close friend and would ignore boundaries set up multiple times.

We ourselves would become angry or cruel towards them on a couple of instances , this only happened after we were pushed when we were having an episode or meltdown. Every time we would profusely apologize and believe we were in the complete wrong and horrible. They then latter on after we broke up sent us a threatening message that was purposefully written in a way to trigger our PPD and CPTSD aswell as they sent us threats in that message and asked us to take down the post we made or “things would get ugly”. This was what’s known as “Reactive Abuse” a manipulation tactic abusers use against victims to try and get them to not speak out.

They expected us to be able to handle all of our disorder , disabilities and trauma perfectly and at the same time give them immense amount of attention.

They made us feel like we had to apologize for having private meltdowns or episodes , they would constantly push us for attention when we indicated we were in a episode or informed them we had to be offline.

We just wanted to make this post to explain why we have been gone for a bit and stuff and aswell as the fact up until now we were under the impression most things were our fault and that they were not abusive, they were.

Screenshots of our prior announcements in the server are under the cut. Do know this is before we realized they were abusive.

If you know who this is DO NOT HARASS THEM we hope they learn to grow and heal but we will not be there to see them grow.

here are the SS about the convos we talked about in the post.

^ first msg we received ever from them

^ them asking us invasive personal questions a day (?) after first talking to us. We thought this was normal at the time due to not knowing what a healthy relationship looked like ( we have been groomed multiple times so this behavior was normalized to us)

^ this is the messages from the day we got together. The 16th.

^ them messaging us multiple times while we were having a meltdown. Us apologizing profusely for having a meltdown and not meeting their needs , this was something that happened frequently in the relationship. They knew most of our trauma , disorders and triggers. They commonly pushed and even in our opinion purposefully triggered our episodes.

^ them asking another slightly invasive question out of the blue. This wouldn’t be a problem if this hadn’t happened and kept happening many times.

^ them asking about our friend kit. We had to make multiple bounties about them not asking us abt kit and they broke them every time. They constantly asked if kit disliked them , if we were talking to kit , why did we call kit a nickname ? Etc etc. We stopped talking to Kit as much as we were afraid that would cause them to spiral or be angry.

^ them talking a bunch about their other crushes. Is jokingly saying we were the “side how” turns out that was true! They cheated on us. In relationships especially open ones there needs to be communication and while we shared all of the infos abt our partners / bonds with them they never told us abt theirs, even lying abt it when we asked ( the next screenshot)

^ them lying to us abt not being in a relationship. According to timestamps of ss they were in a relationship with someone named Ivory at this time ( who turned out to have lied abt their age but that doesn’t matter rn )

^ them asking about kit again , us having to write long orator as we felt bad and were scared we were doing something wrong and us having to justify our relationship with Kit.

^ us explaining that we were splitting , them pressing and asking questions when they knew we had black split on them and were very volatile.

there’s even more ss that were lost due to deleted channels or are VERY personal convos where we were incredibly vulnerable that we don’t want to share.

By the way if they ever make a response we have them blocked on all platforms and will not respond . We will not give them anymore attention it’s not healthy at all.

A serious post.

TW: Abuse , Manipulation tactics , Love bombing

( sorry if anything is misspelled or confusing)

Hello everyone ! We wanted to try and keep this as private as we could but we felt you all deserve an explanation why we haven’t been posting as much here as usual.

We are currently healing from an abusive relationship we were in. We have made multiple posts about it in our discord so we thought we should share a bit more here.

We were in a relationship with a person , let’s call them L for around a month. The first conversation we ever had with them was them sending us a gift of nitro , around 10 dollars. They then went and excessively flattered us , asking us invasive personal questions which we answered due to thinking they had good intentions. We now realized that this was Love Bombing.

Long story short they would become jealous and angry if we talked to our close friend , would constantly ask questions about said close friend and would ignore boundaries set up multiple times.

We ourselves would become angry or cruel towards them on a couple of instances , this only happened after we were pushed when we were having an episode or meltdown. Every time we would profusely apologize and believe we were in the complete wrong and horrible. They then latter on after we broke up sent us a threatening message that was purposefully written in a way to trigger our PPD and CPTSD aswell as they sent us threats in that message and asked us to take down the post we made or “things would get ugly”. This was what’s known as “Reactive Abuse” a manipulation tactic abusers use against victims to try and get them to not speak out.

They expected us to be able to handle all of our disorder , disabilities and trauma perfectly and at the same time give them immense amount of attention.

They made us feel like we had to apologize for having private meltdowns or episodes , they would constantly push us for attention when we indicated we were in a episode or informed them we had to be offline.

We just wanted to make this post to explain why we have been gone for a bit and stuff and aswell as the fact up until now we were under the impression most things were our fault and that they were not abusive, they were.

Screenshots of our prior announcements in the server are under the cut. Do know this is before we realized they were abusive.

If you know who this is DO NOT HARASS THEM we hope they learn to grow and heal but we will not be there to see them grow.

here are the SS about the convos we talked about in the post.

^ first msg we received ever from them

^ them asking us invasive personal questions a day (?) after first talking to us. We thought this was normal at the time due to not knowing what a healthy relationship looked like ( we have been groomed multiple times so this behavior was normalized to us)

^ this is the messages from the day we got together. The 16th.

^ them messaging us multiple times while we were having a meltdown. Us apologizing profusely for having a meltdown and not meeting their needs , this was something that happened frequently in the relationship. They knew most of our trauma , disorders and triggers. They commonly pushed and even in our opinion purposefully triggered our episodes.

^ them asking another slightly invasive question out of the blue. This wouldn’t be a problem if this hadn’t happened and kept happening many times.

^ them asking about our friend kit. We had to make multiple bounties about them not asking us abt kit and they broke them every time. They constantly asked if kit disliked them , if we were talking to kit , why did we call kit a nickname ? Etc etc. We stopped talking to Kit as much as we were afraid that would cause them to spiral or be angry.

^ them talking a bunch about their other crushes. Is jokingly saying we were the “side how” turns out that was true! They cheated on us. In relationships especially open ones there needs to be communication and while we shared all of the infos abt our partners / bonds with them they never told us abt theirs, even lying abt it when we asked ( the next screenshot)

^ them lying to us abt not being in a relationship. According to timestamps of ss they were in a relationship with someone named Ivory at this time ( who turned out to have lied abt their age but that doesn’t matter rn )

^ them asking about kit again , us having to write long orator as we felt bad and were scared we were doing something wrong and us having to justify our relationship with Kit.

^ us explaining that we were splitting , them pressing and asking questions when they knew we had black split on them and were very volatile.

there’s even more ss that were lost due to deleted channels or are VERY personal convos where we were incredibly vulnerable that we don’t want to share.

EDIT; more ss that we found and forgot to add !!

^them persisting us 2 talk and ignoring the boundary we made in our status that THEY SAW to to us and us apologizing for being disabled / disordered AGAIN bc we were afraid of angering or upsetting them