like WHY is leno acting like a rescue dog?? "yeah i thought they'd keep me chained up in the yard, maybe throw some scraps every once in awhile so i wouldn't starve. but pld lets me sleep inside the house? in my very own bed? he said i can eat food in the kitchen whenever i want, and he even took me to a grocery store so i could pick out my own treats? he's so loving and respectful. he even said if i'm a good boy he'd start clicker training me!" okay leno. sure.

it's leno's world and we're just living in it. except for will smith hockey, who is living in a bubble with macklin celebrini where the name "ryan leonard" can't haunt him

leno's giggling and squirming as ovi slurps vodka off his belly, his mouth getting dangerously close to leno's waistband and causing all kinds of, um, personal problems for leno and like you'd think he's the clear winner here! certainly the consensus on tumblr dot com slash men's hockey rpf. however i do believe in my heart that will still thinks he's winning. he's going to beat mack at golf and mack's going to dramatically flash those big hazels at him and will's going to demand a sleepover in mack's bed as his prize so he can fall asleep mouth breathing in mack's face. and he's going to leave leno on read.

um actually will's redbull sponsorship is super important. he basically had to post today. the stock market is - and redbull's shares - sales are, they're - well, he guesses someone who doesn't have the responsibility of such an important sponsorship wouldn't get it. but like whatever. he's happy for leno and whatever he's got going on in dc. will's too busy golfing to keep up with the eastern conference.

i need ovi to get ryan leonard drunker than he's ever been in his life, admitting will smith shaped secrets that leno swore he'd take to the grave, crying his eyes out in some DC club while ovi soothingly pats his back and pets his head like a pathetic wet kitten and feeds him more shots until he's on his knees in the grimy bathroom puking his guts out, and someone is like 'uh should we get the kid home?' and ovi's benevolently like 'no, no, it's good for him. he needs to get it all out' as if leno's not going to check his text thread with will just in case he's texted the second his eyes can focus on a phone screen again

leno getting his hands on this specific picture to post to his stories oh it's so over will smith hockey it's never been more over