ooceanouu

Sex shouldn’t be possible or legal

Hopping on the Vine compilation bandwagon, part 1/?

Oh god, I lost it at the Tim Hortons one.

I never saw the cheating test questions sequel before now and it did not disappoint.

It was a simpler time

This comp is a perfect mix of classics and hilarious ones that somehow I’ve never seen before

I find your lack of whimsy disturbing

I don't know how I'm ever expected to be normal again after watching this. this video is already lodging itself deep within my vocabulary as I type

Everyone at Sephora knew i didn't belong there and they all started runnning tords me and chasing me and screaming

@nokiisland

being on tumblr is like being in a car in a parking lot

like it's technically public, but you're also sorta in your own little bubble, and people have to be Actively trying to listen in order to hear you, if they're even aware that you're speaking at all. and then sometimes you accidentally bonk the horn with ur elbow and suddenly the whole parking lot knows you're a virgin

being on tumblr

is like being in a car

in a parking lot

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

if a surgeon says you have to fast, you have to fast. end of story.

if a surgeon says your child has to fast, they have to fast. even if they are rreeeaaaallly hungry. even if they beg for food. even if they cry. even if they throw a tantrum. even if they scream for hours.

if a surgeon says you have to fast, you have to fast.

For a bit more context/plainer language from a child life specialist:

the medicine the doctor gives you to make you sleep, called anesthesia, makes you sleep differently than you do at night. Medicine sleep is so deep that the muscle that keeps your stomach closed falls asleep too.

Your stomach and your lungs are connected by your esophagus, which connects to your mouth and brings air to your lungs and food into your stomach.

Because you’ll be laying flat on your back, This means if you have food in your stomach it can come up out of your stomach, and because they’re connected by your esophagus, food or drink that comes out of your stomach can go into your lungs.

Because they aren’t supposed to have stuff other than air in them, having food or drinks in your lungs can make you really sick.

The doctors really don’t want that to happen, which is why they ask you not to eat or drink anything the day you’re having your surgery/whatever you’re getting anesthesia for. It can be really hard but it’s important!

everyone move over this post is about fish religion now

you've heard of Legal Eagle now get ready for the Surgeon Sturgeon

you’ve heard of Legal

Eagle now get ready for

the Surgeon Sturgeon

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

Hey everyone, I know it's going to be a busy day for a lot of people, but Google enrolled everyone over 18 into their AI program automatically.

If you have a google account, first go to gemini.google.com/extensions and turn everything off.

Then you need to go to myactivity.google.com/product/gemini and turn off all Gemini activity tracking. You do have to do them in that order to make sure it works.

Honestly, I'm not sure how long this will last, but this should keep Gemini off your projects for a bit.

I saw this over on bluesky and figured it would be good to spread on here. It only takes a few minutes to do.

Why is that the image google used

snoopy of the day

this is making me hyperventilate

I have no sense of sense is too funny not to highlight

yandere this and tsundere that how about doing your laundere

it's pronounced lingerie

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