I think I talked about his before but I don’t care lol.
Manon absolutely hates being sick. It’s been drilled into her that she is a Blackbeak, heir to a mighty name. Sickness is a weakness that is never tolerated (in her grandmother’s eyes). She always turns it against her: her own carelessness led to her becoming sick (never mind Manon is chronically stressed which fucks up her immune system, but then again, that is also her fault). To her grandmother, getting sick is something that she has caused, and there is always a lot of guilt / blame that comes with that.
‘You’re careless and weak’ is the usual mantra. Alongside ‘can’t do anything right,’ with a side of ‘will bring the downfall of our name,’ and her grandmother’s favorite ‘I should find another well-suited heir,’ she's just easily reminding Manon that she will disown her and find someone more capable.
So, Manon doesn’t let sickness get in the way. She pops these pills and pretends that everything is fine. It takes a week tops; she can easily handle that.
She’d be running a high fever, but she’d deny it and go on about her day high on those over-the-counter pills she’s taken to handle her ailment, and that is that. Manon doesn’t let sickness stop her, and she doesn’t even acknowledge it.
Asterin and Sorrel don’t like it at all, but there isn’t much they can do about it. Manon is stubborn and she picks and chooses what she wants to hear.
Even in adulthood, guilt and shame are swirling inside of her at the realization that she is unwell. But it doesn’t matter, she knows how to handle things and sickness doesn’t stand in the way at all.
Manon just denies that she’s sick and carries on like nothing is wrong.
Dorian learned quickly that this is a battle he can’t win because Manon is in denial and very stubborn about it. And he realized that this is not something he wants to fight over (it can escalate to an actual fight) because, really, he needs her to rest and probably see a doctor so that she gets better. But instead, he’s forced to watch her push herself to the limit because she insists that she’s not sick and doesn’t need to rest, let alone see a doctor.
Dorian hates it, but he knows he should wait it out. It’s either she starts getting better or gets worse to the point where she collapses. Does he like it? Absolutely not. Is there anything he can do about it? Not at all.
One time he decided that he needs to put his foot down. It was a terrible night that he wishes to forget about but it will forever be ingrained in his memories.
Manon was sick, but she kept brushing it aside as nothing. He let her be because what else could he do? All her defences were up, and she kept him at an arm's length.
She got worse, getting out of bed was becoming more difficult, and her temperature didn’t go down for more than three days. Still, she didn’t admit that she was sick. She tried to get out of bed one evening, but it was becoming increasingly difficult. Her coughing was getting worse and he knew that he shouldn’t wait this out.
A week later, she kept gradually getting worse. At one point, she tried to get up, but she ended up passing out. She was having difficulty breathing, and it didn’t look like she was going to be up on her own.
Knowing that this is too alarming, he called for an ambulance.
Manon ended up staying at the hospital for over three weeks. And even then, it took her three more weeks to fully get over her sickness.
Dorian hates that it got to that point. He hates that this is how bad things have to get before he can interfere. He hates having to bring it up whenever Manon is feeling sick.
He spoke to Asterin about it, wondering if they do things differently and can actually help. But the answer was the same: Manon doesn’t allow herself to admit that she’s sick because her grandmother never tolerated such acts of weakness. It angers her to no end, and one thing people avoid is making that woman angry.
So really, at the end of the day, there isn’t anything he can do. But Dorian isn’t known for giving up. He figured that it was all about association. Of course, he can't just magically erase Manon's entire past and memories. This is why he decided to focus on creating new ones. For example, he doesn't bring up the fact that she is sick or unwell. He simply calls it something else altogether. Like, just them lying down for a bit. It's tricky and doesn't always work, but there is progress.
Dorian usually runs Manon a hot bath, then she'd wear one of his shirts, and he just... created this whole routine to make her feel safe and okay with taking some time to recover. It might not last for long, but he is grateful that she's at least resting and sleeping.
With time, Manon got better at it, and Dorian was more persistent because he didn't want to call an ambulance for her ever again. He was so scared when it happened, the only thought going through his mind was that she could die and he couldn't live with that. This is why he took matters into his own hands when it comes to this sort of thing.
