phantom

oh how I long for him, how I miss him. do I miss him, or how he treated me? both, I think. break me down, force me to my knees. tell me how I belong to you, how I am made to serve. pretty please? I’ll beg for you. I crave it, I need it.

Marcel Proust, from a letter featured in The Selected Letters of Marcel Proust

7 April, 1939 Letters to Véra by Vladimir Nabokov

‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾　☽༓･*˚⁺‧͙‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾　☽༓･*˚⁺‧͙‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾　☽༓･*˚⁺‧͙

Let me sink my teeth into your shoulder... feeling the skin tear apart under my white canines, as the metallic taste fills my mouth... harder, harder... more, I need more... please give me more.

‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾　☽༓･*˚⁺‧͙‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾　☽༓･*˚⁺‧͙‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾　☽༓･*˚⁺‧͙

You only say 'I love you' when I’m crying.

Is that what it takes?

Do I have to sob, scream, bleed to get your affection?

Fine.

I’ll slit my palm open and smear it across the walls like some ritual offering.

I’ll put on a show.

Collapse at your feet with my ribs showing through and my voice cracking from overuse.

Again, you'll say you love me.

But will you mean it?

I wonder, if I were more forceful—if I gave you no choice and kept you all to myself... How quickly would those words become true?

My love language is obsession and insanity

i'm not a psychotic.

i just want mine to be only mine and no one else's.

i hate sharing.

Every time you hesitate, it only makes me want to take more from you. You don’t need hesitation. You need me, and you’ll do anything to prove it, won’t you?

Whatever you see on the internet is a complete lie. You see these "petitite shut-in" girls with rooms that costs millions, that's a lie. They romanticizes something me and other people get shamed about. They're not shut ins, they don't even know the struggles of being one. They're just girls with rich parents that are attention farming and pedobaiting. No, Emily, my room isn't cutecore aesthetic, and no, I don't have expensive plushies, posters and figurines everywhere. I have dirty clothes all over the floor and bowls with mold in them everywhere. My bed isn't full of expensive plushies neither, is full of opened snacks bags, cans and crumbs. I don't have expensive cute outfits from famous merch and cute wigs. I'm in my bf's hoodie, random pajamas pants I have since I was 15 and some socks. All of them not changed or washed in weeks.

It's not cute and being a shut in is not fun and aesthetic. It's a miserable lifestyle you grow up with and never get out.

Literally everyone wants a shut in/loser gf until she's not tiktokfied romanticizer type shit with rich parents and money from pedos online. Y'all are some gullible pussies lolz

how it feels when they finally fucking text back

i don't believe in god, but i could make a religion out of my love for you. you are the one i worship and devote my being to. i don't believe in god, and yet i see him in you.

I am yours, heart and soul. Every beat of my heart belongs to you, every thought I have is consumed by you. There is no other in my world but you, and I will worship you until my last breath. Your beauty, your power, it humbles me. I’m so grateful that you’ve taken me, claimed me as your own. I exist to please you, to serve you, to make you feel adored. I’ll give you everything I have and more, because you are my everything, my reason for living. Please, let me be the one to worship you.

When i say "if i cant have you, no one can." its not a threat, my doll. its a promise that you'll be tangled in my arms and wrapped around my finger in this life and the next. that not even death could separate what we have now. a promise that i won't give up on you and ill wrap the string of fate around cupid's neck until not even he can deny us.

the day you aren't mine is the day our souls cease existing.