send me a made-up fic title and i'll tell you what i would write to go with it

send me an ask with a fake title and ill tell you what that would prompt me to write!!

its horus he’s here

Guys no, it gets so much better. 

A small fat bird, like the above, is the hieroglyph used in Ancient Egyptian to mean “wicked” or evil”.

The phrase above him (the inscription should be read from the top down) is “Nb s3″ or “Lord of the son of”. Genitive is usually implied in this sort of phrase without a connecting word, meaning:

This birb has literally created the sentence and declared himself “ Lord of the Son of Evil”

God dammit, I realised I made a mistake doing this from memory- the first sign is “k” for “your”, not “nb” for “lord”. So this birb has declared himself “your evil son”, not “the lord of the son of evil”. Which is not quite as dramatic, but still very menacing. You go bird.

Behold, my evil son. I am so very proud of him.

Me with all my current WIPs. 😅

here have this grond meme that my partner made

@pollydoodles have I tagged you before? Yes/no? Who cares this is fucking evergreen

Hahah you have not BUT that’s a Venn diagram of interest of which I am firmly in the centre

Watch: George Carlin spoke the truth about pro-lifers in 1996 — and it’s still being proven today.

You’ve heard of:

Get ready for:

I just fucking finished spartacus for the first time and I feel like I have died inside

I said the same thing months ago, I feel you.

Glinda really had an entire musical number expounding on the theme of "success in life is not about being highly qualified or even competent, but manipulating people's superficial perception of you." and then she went into POLITICS. truly the #girlboss representation the world has earned

Do NOT leave this in the tags! I’m obsessed by the mental imagery of Elle Woods and Glinda meeting ahhhhhhhhh

@pollydoodles is it bad that I went there? (Okay but now with added James Buchanan Barnes.)

Definitely not bad whatsoever

You know what low key makes me sad? The scene in Avengers when Fury finds Steve at the gym to recruit him.

Yeah yeah, Steve is glowing and sexy from working out, and his ass looks great in those sweats.... but think about that (not his ass the other thing). He's sweating. Like seriously sweating....

How long was he at the gym, by himself (having fucking flashbacks no less!) to have worked up that kind of a sweat? This is Captain America, its not easy to wind the guy but he is very clearly worn out and drenched here. The poor man has been all alone, taking out all his pent up painful memories and emotions on those bags for fucking hours probably. Then Fury just shows up to talk to him about the very thing he is having ptsd flashbacks about! Just uuuugh I hate it!

Steve I just want to hug you 🥺😭

you COMMENT on fic? you comment on the story like it's worth something? oh! oh! love for reader! love for reader for One Thousand Years!!!!

This.

Yes.

Rest in Power to The Vivienne. A beautiful soul taken far too soon.

Fic Reading Challenge Stats

Happy New Year, friends! I come bearing my last post of reading stats and fic recs for 2024. I hope you’re able to take some time and enjoy some of the stories that kept me company this year. 🖤

I always slide in with December numbers before I hit the pie charts for the year… I read 743,608 words and 208 chapters in December. I completed the @fanfic-reading-challenge Tasks on December 1st so I spent the month mostly rereading old favourites. We also had a very busy holiday season (my middle son got engaged!) so there was generally just less reading done. Ah well. New year, new goals.

Annual Stats

In 2024, I read (or reread) nearly 17.1 million words (800 stories). This number is WAY down from last year (by nearly 4 million words!) and while I didn't read as many different authors, I did branch out into 132 fandoms (as opposed to 114 in 2023) and I read 170 various ships (a slight uptick from the 162 unique ships in 2023).

The 2025 @fanfic-reading-challenge is out now (I posted about it a few days ago) - so I hope some of you will sign up and join the fun. It's going to be very challenging this year, but there is no correct way to do it and you can read a little or a lot. It’s just a twist to something you’re all doing anyway. And the discord is very busy and fun as well.

And of course, thank you to everyone who gave me suggestions for stories and pairings and fandoms and who shared their favourite stories with me. I could not have gotten through this year without you and I’m SO grateful for you. 🥰

How wonderful - and what a lot of reading!

I hope you find just as many great fics this year 🥰

WIP

Saw this, thought it looked fun.

Game Rules: Make a 24hr poll listing the titles of every WIP you want to work on. (It’s fine if you only have one, still make a poll for the vote count). Whichever WIP title gets the most votes, write 1 sentence for every vote received.

Legit forgot about this, what a useless person I am.

However, as per the votes:

The Only Logical Solution (Darcy/Bucky, Explicit)

“Not sure it went so well, last time,” he said, matching her tone and watching as her fingers began to move with a tentative slowness that he’d not experienced from her before. He meant what he’d said, but couldn’t stop his breath catching as she touched him.

When We Collide (We Come Together) (Darcy/Bucky)

“Thor’s good people,” Darcy said, a slight edge to her voice.

“That he is,” Bucky agreed. “Several good people, all shouting at once. And, for some reason, naked.”

Thanks, He’s a Rescue (new Pizzaverse)

“Hi-nice-to-meet-you-my-name-is-Bucky-Barnes-my-friend-is-Steve-Rogers-you’ve-probably-heard-of-him-as-he-is-Captain-America-and-part-of-the-Avengers-”

“Oh,” Pepper said, raising a hand to her face, concealing the smile that threatened to overcome her typically calm demeanour.

27 Dresses (Darcy/Bucky)

“I think the Russian circus might still be in that tent, Lewis.” Barnes snorted, shifting the gun from one shoulder to the other and giving her another once over. Steve, apparently knowing better, opted to keep silent and head for the fridge. He too was suited, the dark blue of his stealth suit even darker in places where blood had splattered across it.

It’s Friday (I’m in Love) (Darcy/Bucky)

“So we’re babysitting Thor’s girlfriends in the middle of nowhere,” Bucky snorted. “I see why you fought the Accords so hard. Imagine if they’d stopped you from doing this.”

legally blonde from warner’s perspective is so funny

One day you’re dating this gorgeous but ditsy girl but your family pressures you to break up with her once you go to harvard so you do and it ends in tears but whatever.

Next thing you know, she’s at Harvard, dressed in entirely different clothes, saying its easy to get in and she’s pretending she forgot you go there. But you payed your way in and she’s rich too so you kind of assume she did the same thing and fine, so you have a stalker now.

There’s a mixer at the start of the school year. She shows up in a playboy. bunny. costume.

She tries to flirt with you while your fiance is in the next room. You tell her enough is enough and she gets like really angry at you.

Suddenly she is kicking ur ass in class, she steals opportunities away from you, she steals your girlfriend, she starts winning cases, she’s on the news now, she graduates as valedictorian

And you deserve it

The book from his perspective is even funnier.

You break up with the girl you actually really like because she's hot, but your family expects you to marry a girl who's rich and also smart enough to be a lawyer herself, so you string her along until just before graduation and then tell her so long and thanks for all the fish.

Then you show up at Stanford for orientation and, at the end of the long list of accolades and accomplishments the various students in your graduating class comes in with, the dean of students announces Stanford Law's first-ever beauty queen, and holy shit it's your ditzy ex.

You have already gotten engaged to the girl your parents expect you to marry. Your fiancee is actually in more of your ex's classes than you are, just because of how the schedules line up. There are quite a few people in your class who knew her before and they all mock her. Most of the other students get in on it. You stay out of it.

There's a Halloween party, she shows up dressed as a Playboy Bunny, and she outright tells you she came to Stanford to prove she's good enough for you. You laugh at her.

Your fiancee convinces you to send everything you ever got from your ex back to her. She does this right before first semester finals. You may possibly feel like a jerk, but you do it anyway.

You get your grades back for the first semester. Your fiancee is near the top of the class. You are at the bottom of the class. You are pissed off about this. You decide you need to do something about this situation. What you decide that you need to do is take your ex, who understands you and would never show you up with grades like that and knows how to make you feel like the biggest man in the world, out to dinner, order a meal that your fiancee has managed to convince you to stop eating for your health, declare to your ex that you are going to start making your own decisions again...and have therefore decided to start playing golf again, damn what your fiancee says. You are completely confused when your ex leaves the table in tears.

You may or may not find out that your ex took all her first semester classes pass/fail, which means she technically did better than you.

You apply for an internship with a lawyer who is working on a case involving a woman accused of murdering her elderly husband. You get it, along with your fiancee, a militant feminist, and your ex. The feminist gets the internship because she is an expert in women's rights and particularly as they relate to this case. Your fiancee gets it because she has insanely good research skills and the grades to back it up. Your ex gets it because she is passionate about the case and also has connections with a number of people involved in the case, including the defendant. You get it because your father went to law school with the lawyer in question.

Your ex gets to go along on depositions. Your fiancee also goes to depositions. You are struggling to keep up with the minimal workload you have been given.

The case gets to court. The lawyer is on the verge of losing. Your ex suddenly jumps up and asks to ask the key witness questions. She then manages to skewer the entire testimony based on her intimate knowledge of both beauty routines and sorority politics. She gets mobbed by the press immediately following the case and the lawyer goes on record as stating he is proud of her.

You are delighted. You present your ex with a detailed explanation of how you can now marry her, because your parents will accept her when your dad's old friend tells them how smart she is and you can have a hot wife too. Your ex informs you that she's not interested in you anymore and that she's realized she can do better, and then adds that incidentally your fiancee has been standing behind you this entire time hearing you talk about how she's ugly as a brick fence and you're only marrying her because your parents are making you.

Your fiancee gives you the ring back, skips class, and goes to the salon. Your exes have now unionized.

Okay, confession time:

I have never seen Legally Blonde. Yes, I know. Obviously it is well past time for me to rectify this situation.

Right, @pollydoodles?

Make it your New Year’s resolution

"Half of England is owned by just 1% of the population. According to research by author and campaigner Guy Shrubsole, individual homeowners hold just 5% of the country’s land, while the aristocracy owns 30%."

This was a big turning point in UK land management, and also its social fabric - the Enclosures Act. It took almost all the common land that poor people (quite literally, commoners - this is what the term means) were using to graze their animals for free, and put it into private ownership, meaning those commoners now had to pay the new owner for the grazing.

No one could afford it. This caused rapid and widespread rural poverty, and drove people en masse to the cities for work - just in time for the Industrial Revolution, which needed bodies to work the factories. It decimated rural society and culture. And by now, we see the opposite - rich people moving to the country, because they're the only ones who can afford it.

If you’ve ever been to the UK and gotten yourself out of London and into a more rural area, and then thought to yourself good god why can’t these people make roads in straight lines - apparently, this is why.

The common land was enclosed, but it’s not neat little square parcels, and so the common roads that were made meander along the borders of these odd shaped bits of land and, as a result, have on occasion some rather hairy bends.