Pinned
The tail end of February…it’s cold and dark and wet and windy (well it is here)
Have some Murderbot and Gurathin FLUFF
It’s warm and safe and cuddly*
3K, one chapter oneshot for the
Reblogged
Three doesn't look at the ceiling when talking to Perihelion but looks straight ahead
Once it gets comfortable around people, it's rarely still, liking to drum it's fingers on surfaces or swing it's legs or shift it's weight from one foot to another
People assume that, because of it's name, it'd be a math nerd and while it likes math, it's really into science and economics.
It bonds with SecUnit over historical dramas. It doesn't comment on the lack of historical accuracy in the moment but has fun picking apart the inaccuracies with Peri/Holism later
While SecUnit prefers to be off alone with ART in it's downtime, Three likes to hang out with the other humans. It may not actively engage but it likes being in the same room, a nerdier version of parallel play (like SecUnit, it's favorite humans are big nerds which suits Three just fine because it is also a nerd)
The humans ask if it wants to keep it's name private but, unlike SecUnit, it likes having other people use it's name. This makes it feel known and wanted. Not an interchangeable, nameless, easily replaceable secunit but an individual. The humans don't want any secunit, they want Three. The use of it's name also keeps secunits One and Two memorialized. You can't help but remember that Three was once part of a set
It calls MB by it's feed name mostly but sometimes "1.0" to annoy it. It calls it "SecUnit" when talking aloud or to clarify for the benefit of the humans, which weirds some humans out ("Aren't you....both secunits?" "No. That's SecUnit. I'm Three") but is perfectly logical to other constructs, bots, and the humans that have known it longest.
It has a customer service smile. SecUnit decidedly does not.
It has a favorite color. That color is white. SecUnit thinks that's the most boring color in existence, second only to brown, but Three is very pleased to have decided on a personal color.
Like SecUnit, Three doesn't tend to talk aloud much. Unlike SecUnit, Three doesn't tend to use verbal words in the feed.
Three doesn't curse but, when it feels so inclined, insults like Shakespeare himself is writing it's lines.
Three looks like a cinnamon roll but could kill you
It's best friends with Gurathin.
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I am reminded this morning that Carl Sagan said in Broca's Brain (1979):
The fact that some geniuses were laughed at does not imply that all who are laughed at are geniuses. They laughed at Columbus, they laughed at Fulton, they laughed at the Wright brothers. But they also laughed at Bozo the Clown.
As always I have to point to John Sladek* who put it five years earlier in 1974:
"They laughed at Galileo, they laughed at Darwin, they laughed at Edison … and they laughed at Punch and Judy."
*the man’s surname is an anagram of Daleks!
Reblogged the-bloodrose-gemstone
yo mr white can you sign my permission slip so i can go to the aquarium bitch
jesse. you need money to enter jesse.
yo mr white can i have $5 to go to the aquarium it's for school bitch
jesse. do you want some money for the gift shop jesse.
yeah mr white. can i have money to get lunch there too please. bitch
of course jesse. bring me back a cuttlefish plush jesse
you got it mr white
thank you jesse
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Photo Section From Instagram @dastmalchian Peter Capaldi & David Dastmakchian In 2021 🔥
What!!!!
❤️
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i wish usb ports were several magnitudes larger and made a hefty "kerchunk" sound when you plugged stuff in
Maybe they wouldn't take three attempts to plug in correctly then
Proof positive that Murderbot’s data port is NOT a USB port is that in All Systems Red there isn’t a scene in the DeltFall habitat where it comes back online to hear someone muttering,
Fuck it, I put it in that way up to start with! Stupid ports…
Reblogged crabs-brencil
i was so scared for him
Reblogged allied-masterkinputer
op link the fucking article
thanks. what the fuck
Reblogged liljeconvallaria
Company gunship bot pilot!
Where are you now?
What happens to the Exit Strategy Company Gunship Bot Pilot?
It makes its presence known right from the start:
“The gunship’s bot pilot pinged me curiously. Active SecUnits are never carried on gunships because they’re right, it’s too dangerous; we’re shipped on unarmed transports as cargo. The bot pilot had communicated with SecUnits over the feed on missions, but it had never had one aboard before.”
Ooh bot pilot! You know how dangerous SecUnits are supposed to be, and you’re pinging it? Curiously?
Not just curious:
“The bot pilot was curious and friendly”
Then the first indication the ship is under attack:
“I lost the rest because I caught an alert from the bot pilot to the gunship’s human captain. ”
Go bot pilot, trying to get the humans to see the danger!
Things escalate pretty quickly—
“I slipped all the way into the ship, into the pilot bot’s hardware.”
Ahem, Murderbot—you’ve only just met!
“The bot pilot asked if the Attacker was a construct created from human neural tissue, rather than a bot, and indicated points in the analysis that would confirm that theory.”
So this pot pilot is bright! Keeps calm. You’ve got a SecUnit in your hardware and you’re under attack and you manage to spot what the Attacker is! Go bot pilot!
“The bot pilot wanted to know what we should do. It was a good question.”
“Then bot pilot disengaged SecSystem.
I knew we had to do it but it was terrifying to be so vulnerable. I could feel Attacker bearing down on bot pilot, on me. I told bot pilot we needed to protect this important information so the company could retrieve it later and that I would hide it in the shuttle. Bot pilot ripped the confused ShuttleBotPilot out of its memory core and I dumped the data bundle into its place.
And Attacker transferred itself into the shuttle’s system.
Three things happened at once: (1) ShuttleSecSystem walled the shuttle’s comm system. (2) Bot pilot deleted its own comm system codes and I overloaded and fused its hardware. (3) My body told Dr. Mensah and Pin-Lee, “Now.””
Phew! Murderbot and bot pilot working as an integrated team! Yay!
“The gunship was moving slowly at that point, so the shuttle didn’t drop very far away, but with our comms fried it might as well have been on the other side of the wormhole. Attacker was gone, trapped in the shuttle.
Hah, I thought. Take that, you fucker.
Ship’s feed and system codes were trashed, but bot pilot was already reasserting control. SecSystem did the system equivalent of staggering drunkenly to its feet. Someone on the flight deck said, “Oh, mothergods, we’re clear!”
Bot pilot regained control of its weapon system and queried the captain. The captain said, “Confirm, fire.”
I stayed long enough to enjoy the boarding shuttle disappearing in one explosive burst, and the multiple impacts breaching the Palisade ship’s hull, then pulled my scattered code together and dropped back into my body. It felt weird.
Mensah and Pin-Lee still stood in the corridor, watching me worriedly. “We’re clear,” I told them.
Pin-Lee made an excited whooping noise and Mensah grabbed her and swung her around.
I felt weird. Very weird. Very bad.
Performance reliability at 45 percent and dropping. Catastrophic failure—
I felt my body crumple, but I didn’t feel myself hit the deck.”
So…quite the adventure for bot pilot! And the last it sees of Murderbot is: when you’ve grabbed your guns, got you human pilot to give permission, and you and the SecUnit watch the fireworks together…
And then, it’s gone.
I mean, this has GOT to have been the most intense date any bot pilot has ever been on?