the way they're literally in love with each other

wlw: The Tortured Poets Department

okay so I'm having a debate with my flatmates

are these all different things and if so what do you call them

I think I have a weird positionality within gay spaces cuz I am extremely transmasc passing, like ppl have gone months without realizing that I'm not in fact transmasc, and like when I meet transmasc ppl, like especially transmasc dykes, they very much greet me as one of them in ways i definitely dont see them doing to my sisters.

This feels especially true for like transmascs who are very much attached to their lesbianism (which I have no qualms with inherently), because I think a lot of the gender I perform in these spaces is very lesbian, even though I have no particular attachment to lesbianism as any sort of ism. I get invited to these spaces that are treated as definitively 'lesbian,' and despite the variety of lesbian and bisexual cis women, nonbinary people, and transmascs, dolls are usually either entirely absent, or in very small numbers, especially in relation to the number in the area that outwardly should have a place in the space.

I really don't think it's malicious or conscious, and I don't think in most of the instances I have experienced that being perceived as a TS woman would have led to outright hostility, I just think people are so used to excluding TS women like high schoolers excluding the one weird kid in class. It's usually not going to be name calling and harassment, most of the time it's gonna be treating them poorly but with plausible deniability, make them feel like they're talking to a wall, make them feel just unwelcome enough that it's them who makes the choice to walk away. Cuz if it was their choice, well, you don't have to confront the fact that you excluded them.

So then dolls find and make their own spaces. Cuz we need somewhere to be, we need some kind of community. I feel more gay community at a local hardcore show than I feel at lesbian mud wrestling. Cuz even though most of the crowd is gonna be cishet, I'll see way more sisters there than at any lesbian event. And community isn't just "demographic," it's a network of people whose names and faces you know. And it's hard to get to know people when they make your sisters feel unwelcome.

Idk I dont really have a point here, it's mostly just some noticing I've been doing, and it just bums me out. Blah

“Just think, Ruth, I never did it for anybody else before. Now nobody in the whole world knows I can do that but you. I just wanted for us to have a secret together, that’s all…Ruth took her hand and smiled down at her. ‘My Idgie’s a bee charmer.’”

–Fried Green Tomatoes at the Whistle Stop Cafe, ch.26

i just know van and tai were so mad in the wilderness when everyone started girlkissing like oh so we’ve been linking pinky fingers under the table at team dinners for months and NOW you guys are all gay? I see how it is all of you are posers

it's ok to block anyone to curate your experience unless you have me blocked in which case you're wrong and also missing out on beautiful wonderful meee <3

actually as long as we're talking about realistic expectations of ageing, the nature of social media decontextualising people's personal posts has absolutely given some of you guys a false and potentially dangerous view of how your body is expected to change over time. I semi frequently see people sharing or repackaging commentary on experiences with disability as if it's an inevitable part of getting older. and like, yes, as you get older you are likely to develop new conditions, injuries or disabilities, but you need to understand your body's baseline well enough to identify those changes and interrogate them.

e.g. if you are seriously having such bad joint or back pain in your 30s that it hampers your day to day activities, you need to take that seriously. that is not 'just ageing', that's potentially an indicator of an underlying condition, unaddressed injury (which is quite common but will get worse if you don't notice and take care of it) or daily habits (poor posture, poor diet, sedentary lifestyle) causing cumulative damage to your body.

I know plenty of 30+ and 40+ year olds who are not especially athletic but who can still climb up and down stairs with ease, sit on the floor and get up again without discomfort, have floor or shower sex, ride a bike, wrestle a dog or a kid, climb a tree, maybe even do a handstand. there is no shame at all in developing pain or mobility issues which limit the kinds of things you can do comfortably, but it doesn't serve anyone to pretend that those changes are bound up with reaching a certain age. even in your 60s and 70s and beyond you should notice if you start feeling a new kind of pain or physical limitation. don't dismiss this shit just because someone told you "yeah that happens when you pass 30"

"Shauna is actually a bad person, she's just horrible this season, I didn't know she was THIS awful," ok so when she told that guy in season one that she was really excited to kill him and peel his skin from his body did yall think she was bluffing

joining in on the fun!

me whenever I see posts about how canon is shit and can be discarded

re: everyone stomping their feet and loudly whining in the notes

chappellroan: 𓏲.ೃ pics from bday .ೃ I <3 my friends soooo much ㅤ‪♡