Predicting Shrek 5 Until the Film Releases

oh, hello there!

as you all probably know already, the teaser for shrek 5 was just released and reactions are a bit…mixed?

personally, i think it’s a bit early to say it’s dead in the water because shrek’s eyes are a little bit closer together but eh

anyways i thought “hey wouldn’t it be funny to rattle off a bunch of stupid predictions until the film came out?” so here we are

statistically, i’ve got to get at least one of these right

bye bye! see you later >:]

they have to travel across the shrekverse (shrek multiverse) to find the pieces of a broken macguffin

shadow wizard money gang is referenced (they love casting spells)

gingy accidentally opens a portal to hell

there’s a high speed carriage chase

shrek and the gang accidentally join a league of bounty hunters

sans undertale cameo

shrek gets sent into the distant past and fiona gets set into the far future

shrek and fiona get trapped in the magic mirror

the terrible dogfish from pinocchio appears oh noooo

ALIENS

a group of characters go out for drinks at a tavern

shrek’s daughter is a chappell roan fan

shakespeare himself is the main villain

puss says “i hate mondays”

the golden goose’s mother and dragon have an epic kaiju battle

shrek will have a midlife crisis and buy the far far away equivalent to a motorcycle