Possibly Obsessed

Fare thee well!

Twas a great show. Enjoyth we did. This week past.

Credit to unicorn of mischief 🙏❤️

Distractions Masterlist

After that morning with Tom, when you felt like you were falling all over again, you decided you needed some distance. He’d tried to hook up a few times after that, and as much as you wanted to, you knew it wouldn’t be healthy for either of you, so you told him you were busy. Still, there were so many nights when you came dangerously close to texting him to come over. How the fuck were you supposed to get over him?

Distractions Masterlist

Since the night of Kaitlyn’s birthday party, you hardly ate, you hardly slept, you threw yourself into your work in an attempt to distract yourself, but anytime you weren’t working you were laying in bed in the dark, crying until you physically couldn’t cry anymore. Weeks went by with no communication between you and Tom whatsoever. Was he thinking about you? Did he miss you as much as you missed him? Meanwhile you kept reliving your fight with him, hearing the awful things you’d said to each other over and over again in your head. Yes, you regretted the things you said, but he called you insecure and damaged, two things you knew were true but you’d hoped– you’d thought– he didn’t care about. It broke your heart. In more ways than one. Not only did it confirm your suspicions that he didn’t have real feelings for you, but it shattered your friendship. 

Distractions Masterlist

The first time you and Tom spent time together after you told him you wanted to just be friends for a while, it was a bit awkward. It wasn’t like you didn't know what to do with each other when sex wasn’t an option. That part was easy. You did everything you’d always done together, you just didn’t have your hands all over each other while you did it. That was the hard part. You were so used to touching each other all the time, and now you were both trying so hard not to that you hardly knew what to do with your own hands. Your bodies were like magnets to each other, and at first it seemed almost impossible to resist that pull toward one another. But over time, it got a little easier. Relatively anyway.

Meanwhile, Tom was finding that his feelings for you weren’t subsiding in the slightest. In fact, not being able to kiss you or touch you beyond a quick hug only made him realize that he’d taken that freedom for granted, and it made him ache for you even more.

On top of that, you weren’t quite yourself. You were more reserved and guarded. He relished the times he could pull a genuine laugh out of you, because it was an occurrence which was happening fewer and farther between. And yet, you wouldn’t tell him what was wrong. He never pressed you, but he’d be lying if he said it didn’t hurt. He thought the two of you could tell each other anything, but evidently that was not the case. Granted, he was keeping a rather big secret from you, but that was different. He knew that you were both better off if he didn’t tell you how he felt about you. He just had to get over it. But how the hell was he supposed to do that?

…

It had been a few weeks of focusing on just being friends with Tom, and it wasn’t helping like you thought it would. Every time the two of you hung out, you’d look at his lips and wish they were kissing you, you’d look at his hands and wish they were touching you, you’d look at his arms and wish they were holding you. And the jealousy was getting worse. Every day that you didn’t see him, you wondered who he was with instead. And there were times when you were with him and he’d be texting someone back and forth. Yes, it could be about work or from one of his other friends, but you couldn’t help but wonder if it was someone he was sleeping with, especially when you saw a woman’s name pop up on his phone that you didn’t recognize. To make it worse, every time you had these thoughts, you hated yourself a little more. You never thought you’d be that girl. You used to be this career driven badass who wouldn’t be tied down by anyone, and now you were this pathetic little girl with an unrequited crush and crippling jealousy issues. That’s what you had decided, by the way. It was just a silly crush– an all-consuming, blinding, deafening, mind-numbing, heart-wrenching crush– and the thing about crushes is that they eventually fade. So all you had to do was wait it out. What you were quickly learning, however, is that it was a lot easier said than done.

Now you found yourself getting ready for Kaitlyn’s birthday party, and you were unnecessarily nervous. You knew Kaitlyn would have definitely invited Tom, but you didn’t know if he was going. You hadn’t seen him since she had invited you a week ago. Would he show up with a date? If not, would he go home with one? You don’t know if you’d be able to handle seeing him flirt with someone else, but you couldn’t hold it against him if he did. Then again, maybe he wouldn’t be there and then you wouldn’t have to worry about any of this.

Unfortunately, life was not that kind. When you walked into the pub, you were immediately met with Tom’s annoyingly cute smile from across the room. He waved at you before turning back to… of course… a pretty young thing in a tiny black dress. You were suddenly kicking yourself for wearing one of your more modest sundresses as you walked straight to the bar. Once you had a drink in your hand, you went to find Kaitlyn, using all the effort you could muster not to glance back over at Tom.

“You made it!” came Kaitlyn’s voice from behind you.

You turned around and hugged her. “Hi! Happy birthday, darling!” You held her out at arms length to get a good look at her. “It is so good to see you!” It was true. You realized how isolated you’d become and it was nice to see a friend whose presence didn’t make your heart ache. She also reminded you of simpler, happier times.

“It’s great to see you too! How are you?”

Little did she know how complicated of a question that was right now. “I’m doing alright. Focusing on work as usual. How are you?”

“I’m wonderful! Miss working with you though. Did you see that Tom is here? I’m actually a little surprised you guys didn’t come together!” She chuckled.

“Oh he is?” you said in an attempt to be nonchalant. “I wasn’t sure if he was coming, or not.”

Kaitlyn looked confused. “Really? I thought you guys would be living happily ever after by now, after that kiss from the last time I saw you!”

You chuckled as you shook your head. “If you recall, that was a dare. We’re still just friends, Kait.”

She rolled her eyes and groaned dramatically. “Jesus, you two are frustrating.”

You put your hand on her shoulder. “Nevermind that. It’s your birthday, and I’m buying you a birthday shot! What do you want?”

“You really don’t have too–”

“Ah ah! It’s not an option! Let me do this! I’ll be right back.” You left her to mingle while you headed back to the bar.

“Can I get a ‘blowjob,’ please?” you asked the bartender.

“I didn’t realize it was that kind of party,” came a voice from behind you. The voice that made you weak in the knees. Well, you couldn’t avoid him all night.

“You know what, make that two,” you added.

“Better make it three,” Tom interjected. He leaned on the bar next to you and placed a hand on the small of your back. “Hi, by the way.”

“Hi,” you replied casually, trying to ignore the goosebumps that spread over your whole body from one little touch. “Sorry, I thought I should find Kait and get her a shot before I came and found you.”

“No worries, darling. I’m just glad you’re here.” He smiled warmly at you.

You briefly smiled back before shifting your gaze back to the busy bartender. Don’t ask who he was talking to. Do not ask. “Who was it you were talking to before? Someone you know?” Dammit.

“Just a friend of Kaitlyn’s. A fan, apparently. Nice girl.” He sounded uninterested, which pleased you probably more than it should have. There was a beat of silence between you before he spoke again. “How’ve you been?”

You looked down at your hands. “Erm, busy. You know, with work and stuff.”

“That’s not really what I was asking, Swe–”

“Three blowjobs,” the bartender announced as he placed the shots in front of you.

“Let’s go find the birthday girl!” you said overenthusiastically, handing him a shot before taking the other two and heading into the crowd.

When you found Kaitlyn, she was sitting at a table with a couple of people who were just leaving. She threw her hands in the air when she saw you and Tom and squealed. “Aaaahhh! Name a more iconic duo!”

You rolled your eyes. “Okay, okay, okay. It’s time for shots.” You placed the glass with the most whipped cream in front of Kaitlyn.

“Ooh! What is it?” she asked excitedly.

“Just drink it, and then I’ll tell you,” you replied with a smirk. She eyed you suspiciously and then shrugged, as if deciding she didn’t care.

The three of you raised your glasses. “Happy birthday, Kaitlyn!” you and Tom cheered before all three of you downed the concoction. Yours was gone before Kaitlyn finished hers, so you thought now was the opportune time to tell her what she was drinking.

“Congrats on your first blowjob, Kait!” you said.

Kaitlyn went wide-eyed and suddenly started coughing, which soon mixed with laughter. “You’re disgusting!”

You and Tom both laughed. “It’s delicious though, right?” you asked. She nodded as she continued to cough and laugh.

“I think you’ve gone and killed the poor girl,” Tom said. You smiled at him, amused with yourself and he suddenly pressed his lips together, holding back another laugh.

“What?” you asked.

He let out a reserved chuckle. “You’ve got some…” He pointed to his top lip.

“Oh!” you quickly wiped the whipped cream off your upper lip, and then you noticed he actually had some on the corner of his mouth and you giggled. “You’re one to talk.”

He wiped his upper lip too, not realizing where the cream was.

You smiled and shook your head. “Here, let me.” Placing a hand on his cheek, you carefully swiped your thumb over the corner of his mouth, locking eyes with him in the process. For a fraction of a second, the sounds and sights of the pub seemed to disappear, leaving just the two of you.

The sound of a group of people roaring with laughter somewhere else in the pub snapped you out of your trance. You cleared your throat and looked down at your lap before briefly looking back up at Tom, absentmindedly sucking the cream off of the tip of your thumb. “There. Right as rain.”

“Thanks,” Tom choked out. He cleared his throat and tried again. “Thanks.” He gave a nervous chuckle and the two of you turned your attention back to Kaitlyn, who had not only stopped coughing, but was actively staring at the two of you with her mouth agape.

“You’ve got to be kidding me,” she said, annoyed.

“What?” you and Tom asked in unison. She merely rolled her eyes and let her forehead fall forward into her palm.

After that, you managed to loosen up a bit and just enjoy yourself. You caught up with Kaitlyn and Warren and a few others from the film you’d done together and just generally enjoyed yourself. All the while, you were still hyper aware of Tom’s presence, finding the slightest excuse to touch him in the most innocent ways, and you could have sworn he was doing the same. One of you would briefly put their hand on the other’s arm or back, when you’d sit, it would be close enough that your legs would just barely touch, or sometimes you’d even just barely graze your hand against his when walking by. At first you told yourself it was completely innocuous, ignoring the high it gave you each time. But as the night went on, the more it happened, and the more you had to pretend like you weren’t playing with fire. All you wanted to do was let go and have fun, something you hadn’t done in weeks. Unfortunately, it didn’t last long.

About half way through the night, during a rather rousing quarters tournament, a petite young red headed woman called Lily arrived at the party. Apparently, she and Kaitlyn went to uni together, but what surprised you was that Tom knew her as well.

“Tommy!” she greeted him excitedly, wrapping her arms around his neck as they hugged.

Tom gave her a few strokes on the back before pulling away, looking at her with a large grin on his face. “How are you? I didn’t know you knew Kaitlyn!”

“It’s a small world isn’t it? I’m doing well! What have you been up to?” She hooked her arm under his and dragged him away while they talked. He didn’t even introduce you to her. Your jaw clenched as you did your best to turn your attention back to the game, but you couldn’t help glancing over at them. She was more touchy with him in their one conversation than you’d been with him all night. You were beginning to get an idea of just how well they knew each other. Occasionally you caught him glancing back at you, a look of concern on his face. You assumed it was guilt, or pity, or both. But when Lily also looked at you with the same face, you could no longer pretend that you were okay. You needed some air.

“I’ll be right back, Kait,” you told Kaitlyn, before making a beeline for the alley door.

As the door shut behind you, you leaned back against the brick, looking up at the sky and blinking back tears. You had no time to gather yourself, however, before Tom came to find you.

“Y/n–” As soon as he saw you, his features dropped with concern. “Hey, are you alright?”

“I’m fine,” you said, wiping your eyes, but there was no hiding the tears that had already escaped down your cheeks.

“No, you’re not.” There was a hint of annoyance in his voice, knowing you were blatantly lying to him. “What’s wrong?” He stepped in front of you and cupped your face in his hands.

“Don’t worry about it, Tom,” you looked down at your feet, but he gently lifted your face to look at him.

“You keep saying that, but it doesn’t make me worry any less.” His piercing blue eyes desperately searched yours for the answers you refused to give him, while your own gaze pleaded with him to let it go. When he couldn't find what he was looking for, he sighed and pressed his forehead to yours, both of you closing your eyes for a moment. You brought one hand up to cradle the back of his head while the other rested on his chest. Tilting your head up, you lightly grazed the tip of your nose along the side of his, and he responded in kind. Your breathing became shallow and you could feel his heart racing under your palm. You looked at his lips and he at yours, electricity flowing across the millimeter gap between them until finally, they touched. The kiss made your breath hitch and your heart flutter. For a moment, you felt like you were floating, like you were safe, like you were home, until you realized what was happening. Shit.

You broke the kiss abruptly and stepped away from him. “I can’t do this.”

He closed his eyes for a moment and took a deep breath before looking earnestly at you. “Why?”

“Because I can’t, Tom,” you replied, the pain in your voice clear as ever.

“That’s not a reason.” He sounded frustrated.

Your eyes welled up even more as you shook your head. “You’re not being fair.”

“I’m not being fair? Y/n, I can feel you pulling away from me and you won’t tell me why.”

Beginning to feel defensive, you rolled your teary eyes at him. “You’re just sore because you can’t fuck me anymore.”

Tom froze for a moment, raising his eyebrows at you. “Wow,” he scoffed, shaking his head. “I am sick of you always making assumptions about me based on your own insecurities.”

Your pain and anger continued to rise. “You’re just not used to someone seeing past the whole Prince Charming façade and calling you out on your bullshit. I hate to break it to you, but not every woman you put your dick into falls for your little act.”

“Fuck you, Y/n,” he snapped back. “You’re so damaged that no one even has a chance at getting close to you.”

Feeling a sharp stab in your chest, your eyes shot back to him in disbelief, then narrowed with rage. “You know what? If that’s the way you feel, then get the fuck out of my life.”

“Gladly,” he hissed as he yanked the alley door open and disappeared into the pub, leaving you standing there alone, your body shaking and tears streaming down your face.

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Distractions Masterlist

The next day at work you were exhausted and distracted, almost putting the wrong shade of foundation on two different clients and completely forgetting primer and setting spray on another. You never fell back asleep after you got home that morning and you spent the entire day constantly checking your phone to see if Tom had texted you, even though you told yourself you didn’t want him to. You needed space from him to get over whatever was going on with you. However, the longer the day went on without hearing from him, the more depressed you got. What the fuck was happening to you?

x

Bonus Content

Update!

Distractions Masterlist

Over the next several weeks, you and Tom didn’t see each other as much as you used to. Tom had begun a UK press tour for a small independent film he’d done last year that would release in a couple of months, and you had already jumped headfirst into yet another project– a mini series for the BBC. When you did see each other, which was only about once or twice a week, it was often a brief rendezvous of vigorous, stress-relieving sex, followed by a few hours of sleep before having to get up to go to work. You tried to convince yourself that it was just because you were both so busy– and it was, partly– but something was different. There was a slight distance between the two of you. Admittedly, you were partially responsible for that. 

Distractions Masterlist

Hawaii was quickly turning out to be one of your favorite places in the world, and it wasn’t just the idyllic weather or the gorgeous scenery. It was the culture. Everyone there was always so kind and happy. You learned that “Aloha” was not just the word for hello and goodbye. It was a way of life. It meant generosity, kindness, and love. And it was palpable everywhere you went. 

You were having the time of your life. Yes, you were having copious amounts of sex, obviously, but you also went whale watching, hiking through the rainforest, kayaking, shopping at a local market, and visited famous film locations for movies like Jurassic Park, Pearl Harbor, and, of course, the first film Tom shot in Hawaii, Kong: Skull Island, where Tom excitedly showed you around like a proud little puppy. It was really quite adorable.

“Just an actor” who can read the Iliad in the original text.

Darling, it’s 108. 😘

NO WORK FOR ONE MONTH!!!!!!!

Holiday time ❤️