'he would not fucking say that' maybe he would if he knew he was starring in his very own porn fic for the sole purpose of delighting some freaks on archive of our own dot org. maybe he'd play it up for the cameras. ever consider that
someone get this poor man a chair for the love of god
The Face of Hextech | 1,957 | AppleSharon / @applesharonfiction
Summary: Jayce likes serving Viktor’s sweetmilk in the Man of Progress mug because sometimes Viktor looks down at the picture and laughs. He makes it a point to ensure that Viktor’s brown mug becomes a holder for pens, pencils, his compass, and other assorted stationary. It’s unfair that Viktor doesn’t have a mug, Jayce thinks. It’s unfair that people don’t recognize Viktor for the brilliant person he is. After receiving a mug with his face on it at their hexgate celebration party, Jayce wants to make sure that Viktor receives the recognition he deserves. Based on this art commissioned by the LoL Germany account where Jayce drew Viktor's face on a mug.
Summary: It's just Sunday dinner, it shouldn't be this hard for Jayce to open his mouth and ask Viktor to come, but somehow it feels even scarier than it'd been to stand before the Council and risk banishment.
Your Past is Always Close Behind | 7,442 | Miikado
Summary: After his time in the wastelands of Piltover, Jayce is thrown back further in the past then he intended, and finds himself standing in front of a version of his partner, before they invented Hextech. Maybe he has more options than he'd thought. And maybe, just maybe, he can allow himself to be cared for, for once. “There will be time for questions later… Come.” Viktor holds out a hand, helping the other man to his feet with some difficulty. “You need a bath.”
High Hawk Season | 9,959 | JeanLuciferGohard / @thefaustaesthetic
Summary: Three weeks, and the south-facing side of his apartment is still missing, and they won’t even let him sleep there with a tarp tacked over it, because the ‘structure of the building was compromised’ and it’s ‘not fit for habitation’, as if student housing, even student housing on the Kiramann’s dime, ever had any claim on habitability in the fucking first place. “I've been sleeping at the lab, Viktor.” (which he probably would’ve done anyway, but it’s matter of principle–it’s–okay, it’s fundamental question of free will and fair housing practices and not having to live with his mother, who publicly called him a lunatic) Sometimes, you are a genius, and a sizable explosion knocks out most of your living space, and you end up living with your research partner, and it's only weird if you make it weird.
Jayvik, the missing years 1\2
We need more of this ❤️✨
(open pages for better image quality)
the moment I heard elphaba's delivery of "there's a girl i know..." in i'm not that girl i knew i had to draw this comic, i strongly recommend listening to it while you read for the full experience!
this comic is a companion to this piece (which was inspired by glinda's delivery of the same line in the i'm not that girl reprise).
pages 1-4 are from elphie's pov, pages 5-8 are from glinda's.
flower meanings in order of appearance:
...as opposed to the outside, where you'd normally expect to see the jewel of a wristband like this. It's a simple fact that still carries so much weight:
Of course, one thing it signifies is simply how it's not for show, not an adornment, but instead something deeply personal to Jayce.
Beyond that, however, there is just something so symbolic about keeping a memento directly on top of your veins like this. Where you might feel for a pulse, or - you know - cut in order to end your life (Jayce's suicide attempt just so happens to be the only time he takes it off, too - he doesn't even take it off during sex).
And while it's not something I noticed consciously for the longest time, everytime Jayce rubs his thumb over the crystal, as he so often does... he is inadvertently also baring his wrist and tracing his lifeblood; his heart, his "whole life".
Jayce is quite literally carrying the stone, the beauty and the dreams it represents cased in gold and close to his heart.
And I don't know about you, but I can just never get over how - even though he won't know it for many years - what this gem really is at the end of the day, is the bond Jayce shares with Viktor across time and space made manifest. Given to him by Viktor in order to set them on their path to each other.
At which point, when Jayce does find out, it is then fully embedded into his body and his very essence; to be - at long last - dug out of his veins, gifted to and shared with his own Viktor during their final moments.
I don't know, man... the layers of symbolism with these two sometimes actually makes it more difficult to write these posts because there is just so much to consider. For instance, in this topic alone we have:
You see the issue here? I feel like I can never truly get to the bottom of every facet I want to talk about in any of these posts (while still remaining coherent, that is).
Then again, I guess all that really means is that you are cordially invited to dig deeper if you wish to.
And I found another very fascinating layer to this which - quite frankly - I have absolutely no idea how it could have escaped my notice in the initial making of this post.
I wrote the entry under the assumption that the crystal is always on the inside - when in fact, for most of the show, it actually isn't.
In every scene prior to the first time jump, it is indeed on the inside (implying that it likely also had been that way hitherto), but after the time jump and up until episode 7 of season 2, it is instead always on the outside.
Ya know - in perfect tandem with how Jayce's changing priorities, his emerging larger-than-life persona as the "Man of Progress" and the dazzling Mel bait of striving for personal influence first in order to do more good later, have slowly but surely pulled him away from his dreams and Viktor.
Until this happens:
So yes: I still stand by everything I said in the initial post, and would merely like to add how you can actually glean even more from the position of the crystal than even I was aware of.
And yes, I did in fact watch every single scene with Jayce in it just to make this addition that hardly anyone will see. 🙃
Y'know, right below the one of physi- shot
So we all already know about the adorable little doodle Jayce did of Viktor, but what I want to do is give some love to the way Jayce just... literally drew their brains as creating sparks of electricity between them in his journal too..??
Like how is no one talking about that.
And we know this is what it's supposed to be because not only is it directly below the aforementioned Viktor-doodle on the page that's all about their newfound partnership, it's also right next to Jayce's note about how he had not expected to be so comfortable sharing his life's work with another person (I repeat: "OUR HexTech dream" literal hours after learning the guy's name - JAYCE...).
Other cute things from this page that aren't mentioned nearly as often as the doodle:
I have a partner: Viktor ... • I don't know his last name. • Ask him his last name.
(Ask him if he wants yours while you're at it.)
And also Jayce writing, as a quote, "When you are going to change the world, don't ask for permission." - I guess that line in particular really left an impression.
Now, if you have no idea what any of this is or what I'm talking about, don't worry - I was the same until literally a few days ago (I went an embarrassingly long time thinking I simply kept missing the shot of his journal in the background or something... 🤦♀️).
"Jayce's Journal", along with other things, was essentially an official Arcane lore drop and you can take a look at it here.
...This well-meaning, painfully oblivious himbo is2g.
Don't get me wrong; it's great that Jayce wants Viktor to be included. But that scene as a whole, to me, has always been one of the most brutal when it comes to the developing disconnect between Jayce and Viktor.
It's the most unguarded with Jayce Viktor will ever be about his anxiety regarding the precarious spot he inhabits in Piltover and society as a whole, his damaged self-image... and yet there is not a shred of recognition on Jayce's face as to why Viktor would decline to make a public appearance in front of "all of them".
After all, they're partners, equals (and in Jayce's eyes, Viktor was never broken), so where's the issue?
This right here is a running theme throughout season 1 - time and time again, Jayce fully fails to assume Viktor's perspective and see what the world looks like through his eyes. Jayce knows he thinks the world of Viktor, but sadly, this blinds him to how differently they are treated, how broken Viktor views himself in anticipation of people's disdain, and above that, just how lonely Viktor feels.
How fully and truly forsaken he feels whenever Jayce fails to support him.
Jayce doesn't understand that Viktor needs him at all.
Once you recognise this, you see it in almost all of their scenes throughout acts 2 and 3. Even in some they don't share, such as, infamously, the sex scene.
(Even the one time Jayce appears somewhat close to this realisation, he says "now he needs me and there's nothing I can do" ...Jayce please. Even Mel understood that the only thing he would have had to do for Viktor was to not leave him alone, yet this pure-of-heart, dumb-of-ass boyfailure keeps wanting to do the most and thereby accomplishing the least. I love my man dearly but Christ alive...)
Because not only does Jayce eventually learn – in a very hands-on way – what the world looked like from Viktor's perspective by losing the function of his leg, clawing his way from the depths of the Fissures to the top of Piltover in maddening solitude (save for the gawking of unsympathetic entities). And not only does he learn that the „impossible dream“ as his mother put it, the beauty and the salvation he was chasing his entire life was Viktor all along.
He also learns that this same dream literally bent time and space solely to set Jayce on his path to Viktor. To save him from himself, to save him from loneliness –
because Viktor needs him.
And I believe the moment Jayce realised this, understood the depth and scale to which Viktor actually needed him, that's all there was. In the end, when given the choice, of course he was going to stay with Viktor over abandoning him ever again.
(Disclaimer: When I refer to Jayce as a himbo or a dumbass, I am not downplaying his intellect, only questioning why he's not using it sometimes.)
This entry is very loosely inspired by a post I saw about how Jayce really ought to be more bewildered by the fact that Viktor just told him he had a vision while tripping balls on his own lung-blood inside the HexGates. /paraphrased
I know on this blog we like to lovingly rip into Jayce for being a serial fumbler at supporting the casual love of his life (or no, I don't really like to do that - I love both my boys and just wish they didn't have to stay miserable until two minutes before annihilation is all), but this made me think of how there is one way in which Jayce is actually much "better" at supporting Viktor than the other way around.
See, Viktor - by virtue of being a person of uncompromising principles - is prone to the pitfall of... not being very generous with regards to other people's perceived failings or weaknesses. Or his own, for that matter.
Jayce isn't exempt from this - furthest thing from it, in fact.
Yes, Viktor does always quickly forgive (and doesn't forget) Jayce's numerous blunders. But that doesn't negate the fact that anytime Jayce ventures outside Viktor's expectations of who he is - or who he could be, ought to be -, the dissatisfaction is immediate, sharp and unfaltering. While Viktor's love for Jayce is unconditional, his approval most certainly isn't.
That's not a bad thing in itself; Viktor is (generally speaking) entitled to his disapproval, and as I said, it is merely the flipside of his strong convictions.
However, compare this to Jayce, who doesn't seem to have any set expectations whatsoever as to who Viktor should be. Or the decisions he should make. Jayce will happily go along with any twist and turn in Viktor's thought processes and actions, not only because they are fascinating to him, but because he trusts and admires Viktor implicitly.
(To my knowledge, the only time Jayce expresses discontentment with an action taken by pre-Herald Viktor is during their argument on the bridge, which is driven by immense worry and fear on Jayce's part, and he also backpedals immediately.)
Here are some examples of Jayce not beating the golden retriever allegations embracing Viktor unconditionally:
The fact that - for however subject to change most of everything else about Jayce was - the love and acceptance Singed told Viktor he would have to forfeit in order to live never once wavered for even a second... it just kind of gets to me, okay?
(I can NOT get over how absolutely livid he looks.)
I always did wonder what precisely Viktor meant by that.
Because although we are led to believe that the main reason for his ire is that Jayce broke his promise to destroy the HexCore, not only would this line be entirely unnecessary for that, but this is the line that sees the focus fully on Viktor's delivery and expression (whereas his comment on Jayce's broken promise is instead "shot" from behind, with the focus falling squarely on Jayce's reaction).
All this - and adding to it how inherently striking a statement it is to tell someone you were supposed to die in the first place - goes to put a much heavier emphasis on this line over the other one, really. But why?
I believe it is because (though their parting was likely already inevitable at this point due to additional factors such as the HexTech weapons) it is in fact a crucial part of what informs Viktor and Jayce's disconnect in this scene. As I see it, one of the various ways Jayce goes wrong here is in dwelling on the HexCore and interpreting Viktor's disapproval as solely targeting Jayce's failure to "cling to principle", when the scene direction already told us he was supposed to have paid closer attention to the line above instead.
So, since the show insists - let's unpack this, I guess.
To me, the key to understanding is the question I posed in the very beginning; the question of which of Viktor's two possible deaths this line is actually referring to - his prognosed death by disease or his de facto death in the explosion (neither of which Jayce was "supposed to" avert by using the HexCore). And after some consideration, I think the answer is this:
It makes precious little difference to Viktor - and a world of difference to Jayce.
Let's take a look at the situation from their respective points of view:
When Viktor made Jayce promise to destroy the HexCore, it's not like he wanted to die (even his suicide attempt was more of a bid to escape his guilt and despair than a death wish), but he was coming to terms with the inevitability of it. He may not know that he has only hours left to live here, but at this point, what's the difference really?
And then, something extraordinary happens:
While we don't get to see it, it is heavily implied - both by the way Viktor saying "We have to make it right" is played over the image of Silco reading Jayce's request for parley, and of course, by how he and Jayce end up presenting it to the council together - that this negotiation for peace with Zaun is a joint endeavour.
After all of the lonely struggles Viktor fought over the course of acts 2 and 3, he spends his final day working united with Jayce the way they used to be, and his final moments seeing his people be granted independence through his and Jayce's own efforts.
With him dying - or at least being knocked unconscious - instantly in the explosion, this was the "roll credits" moment of Viktor's life, and he would never have to learn how everything went to shit.
If your death was inescapable anyway - what moment could have been more beautiful to leave the stage?
...Only to wake up in a body horror nightmare, standing less than human before the person you needed to trust more than anything having broken his promise to let you die on your own terms.
When Jayce promises to destroy the HexCore, he doesn't want to, but he would hate to deny Viktor's plea even more. And I do genuinely believe he would have gone through with it, too.
However, imagine how exactly Jayce is interpreting what is being asked of him in this moment. To a staunch optimist like Jayce, while a devastating blow, this is not the end of all hope. This is not a DNR.
In a way, it is merely a "back to square one" - the prospect of spending however many months remain working urgently to find a different solution, perhaps. But more importantly:
It is the solace of still having those months.
(If nothing else, then just to prepare emotionally. As someone who lost her father to illness young, believe you me when I say that having the time to prepare for what's coming is invaluable.)
Jayce is not imagining the death he is unwittingly promising Viktor here to be a sudden, frantic thing. Bloodied and dirt-streaked amidst rubble and smoke, his body cast aside and broken against stone like another piece of furniture that happened to stand in the way of the blast.
Jayce is not imagining ever looking at Viktor's corpse in a state that suggests he never mattered at all.
And Jayce - no matter what Viktor thinks his promise should entail - did most definitely not promise to be able to keep his head cool and his heart detached in a situation so far removed from anything he was ever expecting to handle when he gave it.
Speaking of fair: that's another thing I want to touch on real quick.
Because even though Viktor acts like it should have been a matter of course for Jayce to accept Viktor's death, I have often wondered what Viktor wouldn't have been willing to do if their roles were reversed; if it was Jayce caught in the blast instead. (After all, Viktor knows he is a doomed man, but not Jayce. That's not how it's supposed to go.)
Now, I don't know that he would have gone full Singed, but luckily, we don't have to know. The show tells us exactly what Viktor would do to save Jayce's life, over and over again if need be.
Forget breaking a promise - how about breaking the very fabric of time and space itself? I know we often talk about Viktor as being the one "doomed by the narrative", and while that is true, make no mistake:
For whatever it's worth, Jayce was "supposed to die" too.
If not in the snow storm, then perhaps by his own hand, or through the Glorious Evolution. All of which Viktor simply... refuses to let happen, cosmic integrity be damned.
Additional thoughts I didn't know how to include:
Jayce fumbled so bad that he pulled excuses like “maybe the HexCore wasn’t so bad, maybe Heimer was wrong” Man how was that ever about the features of HexCore? Of course Viktor was convinced that you experimented with his death and treated him as a sample. Just tell the truth that you were so desperate and couldn’t bear the thought of losing him
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How is this a JayVik line? At first and even second glance it isn't, but bear with me for a moment.
What this line does do initially - seeing as it's said in response to Heimerdinger stating he never contemplates his own death - is tell us how important the idea of "legacy", of leaving something good behind to be remembered by, is to Viktor.
This is not a novel idea; I've seen multiple posts talking about the tragedy that is Viktor, in the end, leaving no legacy at all (if he's lucky, that is - otherwise there would only be the tale of that one time a metal maniac threatened to end all of humanity) because all of his accomplishments and good intentions vanish with him and Jayce.
And yes, that sure is one - very bleak - way to look at it.
Because if you think about it for a moment - think about Viktor's motivations throughout the show -, there are two additional driving forces that contribute to this desire to leave a legacy, apart from his desire to help and his strong moral compass:
Loneliness and a damaged self-image.
People suffering from both often end up believing they will only ever be as good, as desirable, as lovable as the good they do for others. They wish to be remembered in death because they can't imagine feeling treasured in life.
I think for someone like Viktor - having placed all of his capacity to make a difference in the world on his "gifted mind" rather than his value as a person -, to be loved unconditionally for who he is may have been so grand an idea that changing the world honestly seemed more attainable to him.
Yet as I pointed out in part 4, even after ostensibly achieving what he thought he wanted in the commune ("an immaculate physique, community, the ability to help people and 'make the world a better place' - a perfect legacy"), from the way he speaks to Jayce and goes on to think and act after facing rejection by him, you absolutely get the sense that there is something vital missing from the picture here.
And it's scarcely even new information at that point, really, as we already learned this a lot earlier by how - when faced with the loss of both love and legacy - it wasn't the threat of losing legacy which Viktor's mind got stuck on:
It's almost as if... oh I don't know, as if Viktor had thought what he wanted was to bring magic to the world, but ultimately...
Oh.
Jayce, same as Viktor, had big dreams of making a difference in the world since childhood, which - while definitely also driven by a strong desire to help people - is proven here to be equally rooted in the very elementary human desire to connect with someone. For someone to understand him and share his dreams ("our HexTech dream").
He found, and was found by, that someone in Viktor. The fact that the very catalyst of Jayce's dreams - the mage - turns out to also literally have been Viktor all along only serves to emphasise this point.
And here, at the end of everything they've endured, Jayce concludes that maybe, to love and to be loved in kind can be enough. Can be everything. Can be all he wants.
I like to believe that Viktor came to that same realisation about himself in those final moments of perfect connection they shared.
One of my favourite things is how mysterious they keep Viktor at the start of Arcane to Jayce, we get the first scene in Jayce's apartment where he deliberately doesn't give his name, the court scene where there's a deliberate shadow drawn over him and finally the next scene in Jayce's apartment, where he talks him down from the ledge and says he believes in him and his research all before finally revealing his name.
The whole hilarity about this is the reason it's written this way is to have Viktor's identity be a big reveal to League players as him being the Machine Herald but without that in universe it comes across as a huge romantic trope to me for someone suddenly coming into your life, sweeping you off your feet before you've even been properly introduced (Jayce's "I don't even know your name" quote has such unintentional Cinderella nods to me)
