Thats a potion whose effect is “teleport straight to hospital”

when I was a kid I went camping and the adults at the big campsite went around and gave all the kids glowsticks and necklaces to wear at night (kids loved it, and adults knew where the kids were because none of them wanted to lose their prettyshiny)

Mine went straight in my mouth because it had a delightful plasticy feeling with a slight crunch if you really went for it. I chewed on that thing for ages. Until at some point I accidentally actually bit into it and it popper and I got glowstick all up in my mouth and down my shirt and it was horrible. One of (but not the worst) things I have ever had the misfortune of tasting. And I knew it had to be poison because it was probably radioactive goo or something and I was gonna die and my parents and everyone would know I died because I ate a glowstick and did something stupid

So I spat it out and washed my mouth really good with water and then wandered into the woods crying to die alone after everyone was asleep because I was clearly going to die from the poison and at least this way they might think I died getting eaten by animals or taken by ghosts or maybe they'd be happy because they never found my tiny child corpse and would assume I'd gone on to live a cool life amongst the trees.

Except at some point my parents woke up and everyone freaked out about a missing child in the woods and me being smart stuck to the trails so I was easy to find with my stupid glowing shirt and my glowing face and my bucket hat 2 or 3 miles down the path.

I told my parents I was worried people might think I was a stupid kid who died doing something stupid by eating a glow stick so instead I decided to run away into the woods forever or die and then nobody would think I was stupid. My folks listened carefully and then told me that was stupid.

Maybe don't use that blender for food any more...

And the camping story is a good example of "kid logic" - it makes sense in a kid brain, but adults know it doesn't. Right along with responses such as "because" when asked the why of something.

You know what, fuck it. Figure skating is now my favorite sport. Unless there's another one that will let a competitor dress up in a silly costume and do all these silly jumps and wiggles and fall on purpose, IN THE OLYMPICS, there's no contest

As a former figure skater I feel obliged to point out how technically difficult that little Chaplin patter would be. See the kind of speed he's getting up to and then immediately moving into that "walk" - sometimes without even a brake manoeuvre. The momentum you build up when moving at speed has to get released somewhere so stopping like that is usually an easy way to topple over (not on purpose). In the true spirit of Chaplin he is making very hard and potentially dangerous things look easy.

For anyone who might've been searching for who the skater is, @jay42 found out ! The athlete is Petr Barna, from the 1992 Winter Olympics

Absolutely fantastic!

your vibes m’lord………

Check them for me, court jester

(faint jingling, followed by a loud thud)

a-tx-lone-star

Found a guy with a boat willing to drive me around the shores of lake Suchitlán just before sunset. My Spanish is not quite conversational but we were able to share our excitement about each bird despite mutual incomprehension. Here are some of the sights!

Tailor of Gloucester endpaper, by Beatrix Potter, December 1903 .. © Victoria and Albert Museum, London, courtesy Frederick Warne & Co. Ltd. ..

@afaroffsong

@leaving-earth requested the least seen movies. So here we have a list of the top 100 films that tumblr users reported as having heard of but not having seen per results on @haveyouseenthismovie-poll.

TW: A couple of films famous for racism are on this list so please enter at your own risk.

Tumblr's Most Seen Movies

I know there's a couple of these going around but I wanted to make one using the results of @haveyouseenthismovie-poll to determine what tumblr's favorite movies were.

Peanut butter, banana, and hot pepper jam sandwich 😋

That... actually sounds like it might be good except I would die from the spiciness.

standwithus

"Kfir and Ariel were born at Assuta Ashdod Hospital, the place where life begins. Now that they are no longer with us, I want the toys placed in their memory to bring joy to children being treated at the hospital where they were born. Every baby born here and every child recovering here is part of our victory over those who tried to destroy us.” - Yarden Bibas

May their memories forever be a blessing.

Mountain Bluebird.

Coconut dogs

Me: has a bathtub that holds a WWII London amount of water

Capybaras: have their own onsen

Sigöldugljúfur, The Valley of Tears in the Highlands of Iceland. [OC] 1365x2048 - Author: rowdey on Reddit

via taylorndean on instagram

Wanderungen in Begleitung eines Naturkundigen - Karl G. Lutz - 1899 - via Staatsbibliothek zu Berlin

I love a bird that shows an adaptable spirit, and there may be no better example than the Great Kiskadee. This bird is in the flycatcher family and is one of those birds that can do just about anything. You can see them darting out to catch insects in midair, pouncing on mice or other small vertebrates on the ground, visiting urban bird feeders, or even diving into shallow water to snatch tadpoles. They are feisty and clever animals, and about as fearless as a bird can be.

With plumage warm as sunshine and a sharp black mask, the Great Kiskadee has unquestionable good looks. If you agree, you’ll be pleased to know there are a handful of nearly identical bird species with practically the same look (like the boat-billed flycatcher)!

Where I live we call them "bem-te-vi" because of it's call and whenever it starts singing we say it's because someone is coming to visit.

Love those guys.

Also, one of those used to mock my aunt's cat by pecking it then flying away.

Truly fearless

there was a whole meme of editing their cries into various songs a couple years ago, This playlist has over a hundred videos of it

God I love the internet. The first ten seconds of that first video made audibly wheeze