Can't wait to disappoint you with my size

Do not believe ANY of your negative feelings after 11pm. This advice has helped me so many times.

Emotions after 11pm are NOT peer reviewed

I hate modern phones, "oh your location has been turned off. Turn it back on?" Whore I just actively went outof my way to turn it off no duh. "If you turn this off some of the functions of this app will not work" that's the intent! You certainly don't care when I turn off features that actually help me! Curious that!

hears someone pounding at my door immediately before receiving this message

I HAD TO REREAD THIS, I KID YOU NOT, 5 TIMES CAUSE I THOUGHT IT SAID THAT AND I WAS CONFUSED BY THE IMPLICATION IT DIDNT SAY THAT

the rule of AITA posts is the worse the title sounds the more you'll agree with op in the end. if op makes themselves sound like the innocent one in the title they were absolutely in the wrong. basic reddit psychology

nothing more disappointing than a shower with low water pressure. i don't want to feel like a wet sad beast left out in the rain i want to be power washed.

nothing more disappointing than a shower with low water pressure. i don't want to feel like a wet sad beast left out in the rain i want to be power washed.

nothing more disappointing than a shower with low water pressure. i don't want to feel like a wet sad beast left out in the rain i want to be power washed.

my little cousin confidently declared that mother nature had a counterpart named daddy electric and i feel like this concept needs to be explored

Deeply angry that actual companies are using the blaze feature to advertise now. It's not for you. It's for the Christian bloggers, extremely niche fandom discourse, and the entire bee movie script.

your hole looks stupid ngl

2022: why are you only flipping the burgers? I don't care that I only hired you to flip the burgers, I want you to do a dozen other jobs too. Damn this "quiet quitting."

Doctor Doom (2019) #7

hold up is that the “I love cocaine” bear

It is. But why??

important discovery derailing this panel thank you for your contribution 

Still up to the old tricks, I see.