oh your pronouns are he/they?

well that’s mathematically incorrect becuase you can still simplify the fraction since both sides have “he”

making your pronouns technically 1/ty

>:)

[Image description 1: tags that read #WAIT I GET IT THIS TIME #OHHHH THIS IS NOT FUNNY #THIS IS MATH #THIS IS A MATH JOKE #THE LEAST FUNNY OF ALL JOKES. End description 1.]

[Image description 2: screenshot of a reply reading, "even better, 1/ty implies the inverse of thank you. pronouns: ungrateful." End description 2.]

listen up chucklefucks, i just gotta say. I'm not defending zir, but I'm sad zie deactivated. Like, i get that trauma lasts a long time and the good stuff is maybe easy to forget?? so maybe it's just like that. And my beloved mutual @/pompeyspuppygirl made a post about zir clout chasing behavior, which is pretty shitty behavior if it's true (and if we're canceling someone it had better be pretty severe). anyways now that zie's gone pompeyspuppygirl said it was okay to make this post (again, thanks ppg everyone go follow her --really everyone in this whole drama is worth a follow)

ANYways yeah zie was my mutual and like, reblogged a lot my smaller posts. (that isn't to discredit what my mutual pompeyspuppygirl is saying about zie clout chasing ofc). AND idk zie was always reblogging art from new and undiscovered artists and reblogging donation posts (which if you don't know is really bad if you're trying to clout chase...) (again, though, ppg is my mutual i believe her.) and like, remember on valentines day i tried to blaze zir posts and zie told me to stop because zie didn't want the posts to go viral? (but again ppg is my mutual and has a lot of proof in the Google doc I'm not trying to disprove that I'm just saying what else I know)

Idk, like i feel like a lot of people loved zir's blog a while back, bc like zie DID make some good posts?? So idk why everybody's acting like they aren't even a little bit sad.,. like ngl this feels like maybe all the reasonable people left to Twitter and all the Twitter refugees who love drama came here??? shdfhhdhdhdhdh haha but idk...look idk, i just, julie i do miss you. idk. more thoughts later sorry I'm getting worked up shshs

Here's the original text because honestly this is impressive and I don't think it fully hits unless you know the Shakespeare.

I am losing my mind laughing THANK YOU SO MUCH OP

As much debate as there is about tone tags, 90% of the issues would be solved by just typing the word. Like instead of typing /gen or /hj you can just write (genuine) or (handjob) and you'll be doing pretty much the exact same thing.

Of course I personally think it's less awkward to use some rudimentary language skills to form actual sentences and phrases. They don't even have to be complicated. Like "Genuine question, why are you doing that?" Or "I'm being serious. Stop that." Or "I'm going to jerk you off now."

I whole wholeheartedly agree with you on this matter OP. I do feel like it's often forgotten in this discourse that tonetags originated on Twitter where they had to get around a constrictive character count for tweets. I think how we got here makes a lot more sense when you consider the process otherwise of trying to fit an entire handjob in 280 characters.

lately ive been bedridden with a terrible case of i dont wanna

excellent

[ID:

Three panel comic with crudely drawn stick figures.

Panel 1: A green person is holding a pill bottle, saying: "Pills that make you green? No, this is estrogen."

Panel 2: The green person throws a pill into a mouthlike, circular cavity in the middle of their face, saying "nom"

Panel 3: The green person now has wide hips and breasts.

Green: "Yes. Excellent."

End ID.]

Welcome back to Tumblr's Poorest Wettest Saddest Littlest Meow Meow Competition! Before we announce the final verdict, let's see how our "lovely" contestants are doing backstage!

VRISKA SERKET, hailing from welcoming Homestuck, is in the blue corner! She's a TROLL, a TELEPATH, and a THIEF. She has also attained GODHOOD, and I'm informed she did nothing wrong! Just off the heels of a dramatic loss in the recent Tumblrwoman Election, she deeply resents being trapped in this narrative device!

Her attire today is plain by Earth standards, but well put-together by ALTERNIAN ones. Nevertheless, she has been known to dress up on occasion, particularly in the colors of her ANCESTOR, the Marquise Spinneret Mindfang!

She is extraordinarily determined, and extremely manipulative. She will do anything she can to make herself into the hero her story needs, consequences be damned. Her actions have made her the source of eternal, vitriolic discourse. Some believe her entirely justified, some believe her a heartless villain, and others believe everything in between; every one steadfast and passionate about their specific stance! Love her or hate her: VRISKA!!!!!!!!

HARRIER DU BOIS, also known as HARRY, sometimes referring to himself as RAPHAEL AMBROSIUS COSTEAU or THE REINCARNATION OF KRAS MAZOV, is here representing scenic Disco Elysium! He is a DETECTIVE, an ALCOHOLIC, a recent AMNESIAC, and a WASTE of ENERGY. Having just recently recovered from an attempt at drinking himself to death, we thought inviting him to compete might raise his spirits some! Unfortunately he does not seem to be totally aware of his surroundings, as he has already tried to touch himself twice on air!

His garish and mismatched clothes are STAINED with seemingly every substance a human body can produce. His face is locked in an EXPRESSION that can only induce disgust and discomfort in those who view it.

The few memories he can draw from his fractured mind paint him as violent, selfish, cruel, and pitiful. He has been trying to get over a breakup for six years, and has only partially succeeded through near-total retrograde amnesia. Worst of all, he's still somehow a decently successful cop. He has no friends and few allies on Revachol, with perhaps the sole exception of the impossibly patient and composed Lt. Kim Katsuragi. Even among his fans, you'd be hard pressed to find one who'd defend him, and ever harder pressed to find one willing to stand in the same room as him. Nevertheless, from the safe distance of fiction, let's hear it for HARRY!

In but a few moments, the doors in front of them will open, and they will be able to approach the trophy onto which we have engraved the name of the winner. 5… 4… 3… 2…

AND THE WINNER IS: VRISKAAAAAAAA SERKET!

—

Vriska: WH8T THE FUCK.

Vriska: WHAT THE F8CK!!!!!!!!

Vriska: I WON THIS????????

Vriska: You pieces of shit can't supp8rt me to win ag8inst some lanky rain8bow-drinking 8itch, 8ut 8eat one-in-fuck8ng 16777216 odds to win poorest, wettest, saddest, littlest g8ddamn meow8east?

Vriska: FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU

Harry: Is there something wrong with you?

Vriska: I'm not taking that from a walking dumpster, asshole!

Harry: I just mean, you seem upset. I thought you'd be celebrating your win. It’s a big accomplishment, right?

Vriska: Are you kidding?

Vriska: You thought I’d be cele8r8ing this? A vote for the most pitia8le, pathetic person in paradox space? I’m not so desper8 to fill my pity quadrant that I need to resort to CROWDFUNDING! That’s like the lowest form of 8egging!

Vriska: And I WON!!!!!!!! With this kind of competition, HOW did I get all the votes? All of them!

Harry: It was a tight race. You fought with honor.

Vriska: IT SH8ULDN’T HAVE FUCKIN8 8EEN!

Vriska: Look at you! What the fuck kind of su8juggl8or suit are you wearing? Did someone 8leed on it?

Vriska: …

Vriska: You can’t seriously think any of that is appealing.

Vriska: Your clothes look like they were dragged out of 8 different gar8age 8ins.

Vriska: You couldn’t 8e more greasy and stained if you drowned in a pail of 8rooding slurry. From the st8 of your body, you actually might have!

Vriska: Are you seriously crying right now? I might not be an expert on the human metamorphological process 8ut you definitely aren’t a pupa anymore. Shit, you look like you’re halfway dead already. Grow up, Pupa Pan!

Harry: Fuck off, fucking spidery bitch! Leave me alone!

Vriska: Wow. I don’t think I’ve seen a grown man act this pathetic 8efore. How the hell did you not win this!?!?!?!? Do you even have a single thing going for you?

Harry: I’m a pretty good fucking cop.

Vriska: There are no good cops you dum8 8itch!

Vriska: I’ve known you less than a minute and you already disgust me. I feel 8ad for the people that actually have to 8e near you.

Vriska: You deserved to win this. I don’t know how you can live like that. 8ack home you would have 8een culled sweeps ago.

Harry: Oh, God.

Vriska: OW!

Vriska: Oh no you fucking don’t!!!!!!!!

Harry: Wh-wh-what are you doing to me?

Vriska: Shut up I’m trying to f8cus!

—

Kim: Yes, Lieutenant. A fascinating dream. I’m sorry you did not win the competition.

Harry: What do you think it means, Kim? Do you think it could be some kind of message? Should I try to find that girl?

Kim: “That girl?”

Harry: Yeah! Vriska!

Kim: No, Lieutenant. I do not think you should go looking for Vriska Serket from Homestuck. Perhaps try looking for the killer in our murder case?

"Why does Group A deserve human rights if Group B doesn't have them?"

Both groups deserve human rights. That's how human rights work.

Anyone who convinces you to barter one group's rights against another is not interested in giving them to either group.

Hi I'm so sorry I don't mean to embarass you but I think your headphones fell out of your phone, it must have happened at the bus stop, your phone has just been playing out loud in your hand this whole time and you didn't notice. So sorry, you must be so embarrassed, really I wouldn't have said anything but I know I'd be mortified if that happened to me and I didn't notice until I got home or something. I'd be so self conscious, can you imagine people thinking you were being disruptive and obnoxious on purpose. Haha yeah no worries have a great day

If you see someone with a really bad fandom take, I’m begging you to open your emails and write a strongly worded missive to your local government official about something bad happening in your community or country.

If you’re in Canada you could email a rep about concerns about Elon musk interfering in our next federal election.

If you’re in the US the list is endless.

If you’re in the UK you could email about trans health care.

If you’re in Australia, what about dental care in Medicare?

If you’re in Europe, look into some EU initiatives of particular concern. Perhaps something to do with nature and biodiversity? Idk

Just today I emailed my local mla about coal mining in the Rocky Mountains and tomorrow I’m going to pick something else and do it again

Don’t get me wrong I love a fandom wank as much as anyone but perhaps you can take an iota of the energy you’re spending on that and put it towards making sure your elected representatives hear from you on a regular basis

Honestly this seems like a legit mental health emotional de-escalation strategy. New grounding technique just dropped and it's going to revolutionize the world at the rate I see bad takes as a regular tag scroller

i am actually insufferable once I get comfortable with someone

Be My Friend and gain access to top hits such as

What a beautiful thing to be someone a friend feels safe to be vulnerable with

how dare you turn my self-deprecating midnight rambles into a hopecore positive post

Get hoped

Once here in Philly, I witnessed a clearly lost driver trying to figure out how to get into this one parking location when I saw a guy helpfully step over and gesture while yelling "Hey Jackass, the entrance is HERE"

I recently responded to a work crisis with “this is the single most pathetic thing I’ve ever witnessed, get outta my way so I can fix it”.

[Image ID: Tweet from Jordan Green (@/ jordanaut) reading: When I describe East Coast vs West Coast culture to my friends I often say "The East Coast is kind but not nice, the West Coast is nice but not kind," and East Coasters immediately get it. West Coasters get mad. (3 tears of joy emojis)

Quote tweet from Simone de Bivouac (@/ RahneAlexander) on 1/22/21 reading: me: trying ro fix a flat tire

in california: oh, bummer, that must be hard for you

in baltimore: baby, what the fuck is wrong with you, Jeesus Christ here let me do it before you fuck up your car more /End ID]

deadbeat daughter

if you're using the phone app, in the latest not so pleasant ui update the "edit post" icon/option has been moved to the meatball menu top right of the post, so though it initially looks like you can no longer edit posts in the app, that's where edit has gone

my greatest joy of tumblr is when I post something slightly kink adjacent and have someone named bellethefloof reblog saying how they wanna be railed while cumfuckslutboy gives a dissertation on the sociopolitical consequences of my claims

The misuse of the "insult to life itself" quote from Miyazaki on AI burns my yams so bad bc the original context is being disgusted with how a characters movements are dehumanizing to disabled people specifically bc of his empathy for a disabled friend and it's such a sadly rare sentiment, this cognizance of how we casually inflict indignity upon disabled people and how he finds it disgusting, I hate seeing it obfuscated

In the video he sees character animation where the presenter comments on how the AI can be used to model "grotesque movements humans can't even imagine." And Miyazaki immediately mentions that he thought of his physically disabled friend, who struggles with movement, with the implication being that what's "insulting to life itself" is the degradation of people like him to grotesque monsters. Regardless of my feelings about AI art I don't think it's worth obscuring this humane thought process to have a rhetorical weapon

Happy one year writing TGCF fics anniversary to me! I wrote 30 tgcf fics (160k+ words and 5 AU series!). Here's to another year!~ My first tgcf fic My AU Series: Pentiment - God of Misfortune/Wulian AU The Other Part of Me - Amnesia AU The Demon by Your Side - Xianle AU Long Live the Crimson Emperor - Hua Cheng as the heavenly emperor AU The Tale of the Prince and His General - Performing Troupe AU

student: my sister is bullying me over text

me: how old is she

student: she’s my twin

me: oh so this is just how u guys normally talk to each other

student: she says to tell you she’s the better twin

me: how rude!!!! what’s her name???? do i know her??? (cranes to look at phone)

student: oh don’t—

his twin’s name in his phone:

DISGUSTING CLONE 🤮

ok apparently i remembered this wrong. he corrected me today to tell me it’s:

HIDEOUS CLONE 🤮