HEEEY, guess whose brain works so weird? Anyway, this is based on a meme in spanish, idk if you have seen it. I love the idea of V having Sparky as a pet. This is my take on it. (Her baby is innocent. He'll always be) Okay, see ya when you least expect it with more dumb things HEHEHEH-

Bread clip animals

@razzware

Guy who likes music

Is he an alien

This is the funniest thing I’ve ever seen

Image description: a screenshot that reads the following;

“Nobody:

Girls that bullied goth kids in high school:”

Attached images are of Taylor Swift, a white woman with sunglasses, blonde hair, a black tank top reading “this is my fight song”, and green shorts. She is wearing a leather bondage harness. It is backwards.

my favorite genre of humor is alt text being just completely factual and somehow reading the image for filth

I had a friend over once who had a panic attack bc my living room at the time had these mirror artworks my mom used to be obsessed with making where she’d buy hundreds of tiny palm sized mirrors and cover the walls with them and the girl I was hanging out with was fidgeting and overheating and started crying bc my house had “too many portals” so the energy in here was powerfully charged by what she called “a highway of souls from other realms” so she ran out and collapsed on the lawn exasperated and had to be driven home

happy april fools. please take this egg

hahahahahha………………..

youve been fooled………………by the april fools beeper……………..it was a fully grown bird the entire time…..no egg………………it tells u it hopes u hav a good april 1st

I just queued this for a year

You know the Grimm version of Snow White makes more sense than most versions if only because in that version Snow White was like 7 years old.

Like imagine you find a 7 year old in the woods and she’s like my mom is gonna kill me because I’m prettier than her and she’s not kidding. You know this queen is that sort of person. So you and your roommates adopt the kid and tell her don’t talk to strangers. And she keeps talking to strangers and getting poison combs stuck in her hair and whatnot.

Like yeah that’s kinda stupid but also she’s seven. She likes apples.

Also imagine it from the hunter’s perspective. The queen tells you this bitch is prettier than me I need you to take her out in the woods and kill her. And then you see who you’re supposed to kill and it’s a 2nd grader. Like how are you supposed to react to that sort of situation? Kill a human child? No. Because you’re not a brainless evil minion you’re just some guy dealing with a cartoonishly evil monarch. Of course you let her go.

Bad look for the Prince of course. Even if she did age while she was in that glass case. He saw a dead woman and just decided to keep her. And once she stopped being dead he was like we’re married now

He did cause the evil queen to dance to death in red hot shoes though. That was kinda cool.

With the acknowledgement that I'm grasping at straws, is it ever directly confirmed that the Prince wasn't also 7?

See, I think that still works.

You are the guardsman assigned to protect the eight-year-old Prince. You are currently in the middle of the forest because he absolutely had his heart set on "going hunting", and the royal second-grader should definitely not be traipsing around the woods on his own. You let him go a little on ahead and he comes running back talking about how there's a dead girl in the clearing and there's no-one else around and he wants to take her home because she's really pretty, Hans, and she's all alone!

You let him drag you to said clearing and okay, that is one angelic-looking dead child alright, and on the one hand the quality of her clothes and the craftsmanship on the coffin (who builds a see-through coffin?) speak to potential Consequences if you simply carry her off, but also for the amount of vines that have grown on the coffin she looks extraordinarily un-decayed, so you should probably get the court alchemist's opinion on that, and there's no way he's going to come all the way out here in his embroidered velvet curly-shoes. And also this kid is technically assigned by God as your natural superior, or something.

So fine. You hoist the coffin onto your shoulder (it's not like the Prince can do it. He's eight.) and head back toward the castle, Prince chattering blithely all the way. And then you turn your ankle on a rock and suddenly there's a thump and a cough and a lot of shouting from inside the coffin and you have now become a key player in a tense political incident with the next kingdom over.

You should probably ask for a raise.

WAIT NO THIS IS GLORIOUS

I have the most wonderful watercolor fairytale movie playing in my head right now from this interpretation, well done all.

Oh, you think you're safe now?

Nothing can deliver you from these paws!

Reblog to animatedly boop your followers

me: (making a mistake) (eating a hot piece of potato right out of the oven) (breathing and chewing with my mouth open) HAAAAAAFASASFAFHAA

my gf: (in a completely different room) … what is that sound? are you eating a hot potato?

easily one of my favourite tweets of all time

The cousin of "he would not say that:" he would not keep saying that. It was a one off funny line for one particular situation. Every memorable line does not need to become a running gag.

The good news: you get to pick your new soulmate! (You can define "soulmate" however you want: platonic/romantic/partners in crime/etc. But they will be in your life, constantly.)

The bad news: you don't get to pick where they come from.

Spin this wheel until you get a fandom with characters that you recognize. As soon as you do, stop. One of those people* is going to be a constant presence in your life, whether you like it or not. So choose wisely.

*broadly defined

Happy April Fool's Day! More Runaways Memes be upon ye! it's ok Hannah, I don't really understand memes either.

(new here? Runaways is my YA fantasy debut novel coming out this Halloween and you can read about the characters on my website!)

Taglist, sorry for two tags in one day but you're the only people who are going to appreciate the shitposts about the blorbos who currently only exist in my head and manuscripts on my hard drive. Ask to be added or removed!

@tiredlittleoldme @abalonetea @happyorogeny @weaver-of-fantasies-and-fables @quilloftheclouds @rainydaydarling @bladeverbenas-blog @andifthestarsweretodie @thelaughingstag @ladywithalamp @avrablake @prettylittlelyres @rainbowsnowflake @theroseempress