isn’t this a fucking thing

this is like huge news in the scheme of mcr fob 2005 history to me

honestly being around people who are not uncomfortable with you having feelings and desires makes the people who were uncomfortable so much worse in retrospect

like. oh! you were just evil

going out to eat some mold spores. anybody need anything?

can i get added onto your will

not sure why but go wild

people are always like "Oh a vampire wouldn't get horny while drinking someone's blood, that's like getting horny while eating a sandwich" and like man have you never had a really good fucking sandwich?

The sandwich i had for lunch didnt moan and scream and squirm against my body and then become limp and pliable when i was done now did it

(Via @morganpdf )

people are always like "Oh a vampire wouldn't get horny while drinking someone's blood, that's like getting horny while eating a sandwich" and like man have you never had a really good fucking sandwich?

The sandwich i had for lunch didnt moan and scream and squirm against my body and then become limp and pliable when i was done now did it

(Via @morganpdf )

people are always like "Oh a vampire wouldn't get horny while drinking someone's blood, that's like getting horny while eating a sandwich" and like man have you never had a really good fucking sandwich?

The sandwich i had for lunch didnt moan and scream and squirm against my body and then become limp and pliable when i was done now did it

(Via @morganpdf )

LEGO - Rubber Duck 

almost didn’t hit reblog till that last image 

A Man of Few Words

A Man of Few Words

it's 50lbs rodent monday

Well this is awkward...

Woah mama it's my own specter

Well this is awkward...

Woah mama it's my own specter

Today at work a man I was helping showed me his phone and said, “I’m looking for a style like this” to show me a ring he wanted but his thumb hit the screen when it was facing me and it flipped to a picture of Avengers themed butt plugs and I laughed so hard I had to lie down.

It’s funny you should say that because as he grappled with the overwhelming embarrassment of having shown a fine jewelry associate a picture of Avengers themed butt plugs I was trying to be like, “Really, it’s okay, you picked the right person here to show this too, I used to sell sex toys, I’m not offended, this is just the funniest thing to ever happen to me here.”

He did eventually come around to the hilarity side of the equation. He got a ring and a we both got a great story.

were I to create an original piece of media I would create bait so queer in order to create a fanfic environment I like. I find you guys do your best work under duress.

I’d say “jeez can two people not be friends anymore?” and then I’d give one of them amnesia in which they only recognize the other above anyone else

were I to create an original piece of media I would create bait so queer in order to create a fanfic environment I like. I find you guys do your best work under duress.

I’d say “jeez can two people not be friends anymore?” and then I’d give one of them amnesia in which they only recognize the other above anyone else

were I to create an original piece of media I would create bait so queer in order to create a fanfic environment I like. I find you guys do your best work under duress.

I’d say “jeez can two people not be friends anymore?” and then I’d give one of them amnesia in which they only recognize the other above anyone else